15 February, 2011

Nanny is being Enticed into Selling Passion Enhancers

Received Tuesday, February 15, 2011
opinion 1 This may sound like a horrible question to be asking BUT I am in a large amount of debt from back when credit cards were easy to get. I know it was stupid of me but now being more mature I need that debt gone. Unfortunately, I don't make the big bucks as a nanny so I'm looking for other options. A friend of mine sells "passion enhancers" if you get what I mean. The parties are usually married women and very tasteful. She is moving up in the company and is willing to give me all her contacts. Since the only free time I have is on weekends I was thinking I'd take it up. But as a nanny I worry how people will view me. I know I could take jobs not in that area where I work so word wouldn't spred but still. I'm desperate and Beauty Products and Jewelry are WAY over done around here. So my question is: how would you view your nanny if she sold these products? Keep in mind I'm quite modest and actually not all that interested in what the products are for but this is a good opprotunity!

31 comments:

Alex said...

I wouldn't do it. Obviously it is entirely up to you but if you are having doubts about it or feel uncomfortable at all then it is not the right company for you to work with. There are other ways to get out of debt. What about taking a weekend only job? Selling things on ebay?

Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

As a Nanny, it would reflect badly on your character if you sold this stuff. You sound like a nice and decent person and I sympathize with your debts. But there are other ways to make money w/out compromising your character.
As nannies, I think we have to set good examples even when we are not on duty..for example, I would die if I ran into my employers at a bar!! While the product sounds tasteful and the people sound decent, I would pass on it and do something else. Perhaps negotiate a raise in your current job? Get another job? A side nanny job??

Anonanny said...

If you're comfortable with it, and you'd be willing to do it if you weren't a nanny, I'd say go for it.

Back when the economy first tanked I could only find part-time nanny work that wouldn't pay my bills, so I actually took a job as a stripper in the evenings. I worked in the suburbs, so I never saw anyone I knew from my day job, and I often made as much in one night there as I did all week at my day job. You do what you have to do.

I'm a great nanny and I have a good job now. I don't consider a few months in the "sex industry" to have hurt my reputation in any way. I think it just shows that I have the determination to make it on my own no matter what.

Hippiechick24 said...

There is NO reason you should even think about feeling bad about this! It is NOT their business what you do in your own time. They don't need to know about your personal life, just don't advertise it to them or any of their contacts. There is nothing embarrasing about the pleasure enhancing industry! Go for it, if you need to make that extra money then you do what you need to do.

Phoenix said...

Being a nanny has nothing to do with this. So as a nanny you are expected not to have "passion" LOL

I would do it in a heartbeat. Hell right now I am thinking about opening my own strip club. But every woman is different. Some are more prude then others.

I think that if you uncomfortable with the products you shouldn't do it. This will make the other women uncomfortable and they won't buy from you. If you are not familiar with these types of things it will show.

TC said...

Dildos are not bad. I would imagine a good majority of women do have them (and no you don't all need to chime in if you don't have one, I don't care) Hell my boss has one, found out my accident and of course that's something I really didn't want to know about her but, hey that's what she likes then so be it.

It should not matter what you do on your off time as long as it doesn't interfere with your job. Meaning you can't do drugs illegal drugs because that could interfere with your job be it going to work high or being arrested but selling dildos or being a stripper isn't illegal and shouldn't affect your job.

If it makes YOU uncomfortable then don't. If you are truly only worried about your boss then go for it, you might be surprised and she might want to attend a passion party.

I will say though that if I ever decided to get into that business I wouldn't tell my boss but I also wouldn't be worried that she would find out and fire me. People are allowed to have sex so who cares if they use toys, blindfolds, cuffs, or whipped cream?

OP said...

OP here: You are right (those who say it's ok)...it's not like I'm trying to sell something illegal (I'm sure lots of mommies use this stuff!) and I would not bring my outside job into my nanny work (like phone calls and such).
These are two seperate worlds. Example: Just because I have ummmm relations with my husband doesn't mean it takes over my life (I don't make odd shaped cakes or dress like I'm going to seduce someone all the time). I think I can easily keep these worlds seperate.
Thanks for not bashing me and UNDERSTANDING this it means the world to me. And again its not illegal...and I'm not really into using it at all (I find it weird but that's just me).

TC said...

op two words you've used make me realize that this is not the job for you.

First you called them passion enhancers and then in your comment you called having sex with your husband having relations. If you are that uncomfortable saying sex or dildos on a website where no one knows who you are, what state you live in, or what you look like then how would you be able to host a party and take down people's orders?

I'm not dogging you, I used to be that shy. Up until a few years ago I would turn bright red when going up to the pharmacy counter to pick up my birth control...and at that time in my life I wouldn't have been able to sell sex toys. Now at almost 30 that sort of stuff doesn't bother me. I don't turn red when picking up my birth control or going down the isle that has condoms and lube and if I needed the extra money I wouldn't mind hosting passion parties.

Phoenix said...

I agree with TC. You should never approach a subject like this as wierd. You are not going to have a good time. If you feel like it is wierd then it could reflect on how you speak to women about the products. You will need to know how to answer intimate questions that women have and you can't show the least bit confused or ashamed.
Personally if you haven't used a dildo or a vibrator (they are different things) then you can't really talk about them. How embarrassing would it be if you accidentally called a butt plug a dildo. I'm just saying... things to think about.

agreewithTC said...

TC said it best. I couldn't agree with her more!

Texas Nanny said...

What TC and Phoenix said. Google "symbolic interaction theory" - the language you use to describe something says a lot about how you really feel about it.

The other thing to consider is how comfortable you will be living a "double life". For instance, I like to party and go to concerts. I'm responsible about my drinking and don't stay out late or drink when I have to work, but a lot of MBs don't understand that and want a little angel as a nanny.

I quickly learned that I can't live with people like that. I'm an honest person, and the more I work for a family the more I open up to them. Having to live two lives - the quiet, proper nanny by day and the girl dancing with the band at night - drove me nuts and made me feel really unhealthy.

My current boss knows exactly what I get up to and is totally fine with it, which is much better for my mental well-being!

MissMannah said...

I agree with previous posters. First, there is nothing wrong with selling these products and it wouldn't surprise me if a lot of MomBosses use them! I actually love these parties because it is a bunch of ladies getting together and just letting loose without husbands getting in the way.

But, you definitely seem like you wouldn't be comfortable selling this stuff. If you think it is weird that people use it, how do you expect to be a good saleswoman? Plus, you can't even type the word sex...how do you expect to be able to talk frankly and probably graphically about it?

MissMannah said...

PS: If you do end up selling, let me know! I just got married last week and would love a little spice. ;)

OP said...

The reason that I referred to sex in that way is because I want to maintain the modesty that I have as a nanny. Not going to lie, I go out every weekend and have SO much fun. In my past I slept around (not a good time of my life). My MB knows about my wild weekends and enjoys hearing about them. Most of my friends laugh when if they see me with my charges as when I am in "nanny Mode" I am COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. You wanna know if I'm going to have fun with this? I am...I am going to have A BALL!
and yes I do apologize for lying (but me and my spouse really do not care for weird lubes as I am allergic) but we have an image as nannies to uphold and I hate to tarnish that rep. But now knowing that its ok...I signed up to do this and turns out the woman who is in charge of training has another nanny she knows doing this! I can't wait :)

OP said...

P.S. I know its terrible to say that you are a good nanny (poor taste really) but I am. My work is my work...my play is seperate. Plus I'm at work 55 hours a week and I only play about 10. My job is my life...those kids are my life...I teach them the best values and love them as if they were my own. Those who know me as a nanny would not recongnize me on the weekends. I keep a good balance! It's not a double life... it would be no different if I worked in an office.

another nanny said...

I agree with those who say there's nothing wrong with doing this. I had a pre-k teacher invite me to a "passion party" (selling lingerie and sex toys, etc) and it certainly had no relationship to her ability to do her job.

That having been said, you really do need to decide if you're comfortable with it. If you're not, business probably won't be that great, and you may end up feeling guilty for no reason.

chick said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tales from the (Nanny)Hood said...

I think you need to consider that this is really a small world, and that you may very well run into people who either know you as "Nanny OP" or who know your MB and will connect the dots and figure out who you are.

After all, who is going to be your target audience? Women, married and unmarried, with and without kids.

Now, if you can completely picture yourself telling your MB, "Hey, guess what? I am going to begin working as a "Pleasure Enhancement" Salesperson!" and you don't think she would give a rip, or would even find it funny/be happy for you, then go for it, but if you can't see yourself letting her know, or you think she'd be horrified if she did find out from a friend of a friend, then think twice.

In-home sales aren't going to be good income sources for everyone, and if you did lose your job over this, and then had to deal with getting semi-negative references, what would you do?

Vanessa said...

Are you people serious?

Unless you're selling prostitution, I don't think it's not of anyone's business what you do outside of your working hours, as long as your actions don't negatively affect your children in one way or the other.

There's nothing wrong in hosting sex toy parties or selling "passion enhancers". I have been in those and never thought anything bad about the seller, because I'm a grown woman able to understand that it's a business and there's nothing wrong with that. Just like it wouldn't be wrong if you were indeed interested in those things. It's your life.


You're not selling it to kids, so where is the problem again?

Isawsomethingnastyinthewoodshed said...

do it, mabie you should sell this stuff to the moms so they keep their husbands interested and away from nannies like monkeyshines

Anonymous said...

Well it's done! I'm proudly a consultant! I'm not going to say where in Wisconsin I am but if you are in WI and would like a party maybe there is something I can do! I could hook you up with someone else in your area as well
There also is a full line of bath and beauty products! Even a tattoo inhancer!!!

from a nanny! said...

I completely understand where you are coming from with needing to increase your income...but what would you do if word got back to your employers? Others may disagree...but I would be upset if I was your employer...I would not want my nanny selling "passion enhancers"...and the double life thing makes me uneasy.

When I worked at a catholic school, I signed a cardinal"s clause as a condition of employment...that basically said I represented the image of the school and agreed to conduct myself appropriately.

Could you find a side nanny job...or ask for a raise?

from a different nanny said...

I have to say I find any mention of a "double life" (as several posters have done) a little ridiculous. It's like presuming if you care for children, you are not allowed to have/enjoy sex. Um...how do we end up with children in the first place?

Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

A few years back there was a story on our local news here in San Diego about a woman who owned a home daycare and they found out she was selling sex stuff on the side. The news practically blasted her for doing so.
It may be unfair and shouldn't be a big deal, but realistically there are some families out there who would not want their nanny selling such products. You know how there are some families who wouldn't hire anyone with tatoos, piercings, or who was a lesbian, etc. Yeah, it's unfair for others to judge, but reality dictates that it happens a lot with us nannies. For some reason, our characters are scrutinized much more since we work with children and have a moral responsibility to mold them into decent human beings.

cali mom said...

Unless I'm misunderstanding something, you are considering selling sex toys, right? Not going into prostitution or robbing banks, so what is there so immoral about that? My only concern would be if you had to make some sort of financial investment of your own in order to "join the business", as many scams work that way, and it may not be profitable after all and end up being a lot of work for nothing, but if it's just sex toys, what the big deal?

CuriousDad said...

There is nothing immoral or inherently wrong about what you are doing.

That said, from a boss's point of view. If it comes up you are doing it, and the boss is not all that keen on it. It wont be about right or wrong, but all about appearences.

You may actually have more of a problem from the father, rather then the mother. When they find out their nanny is selling sex toys.

I suggest keeping the two jobs as far apart as possible. In the end most people end up getting fired over apparent problems not actual ones.

Kourtney K'shian said...

While I agree that it is not illegal or immoral what you are doing, I would truthfully feel uncomfortable if I found out my Nanny was selling sex gadgets. I understand the need to make $$ in this horrific economy. Believe me I do. But I would not want a Nanny who sold sex toys on the side. It would be too weird for me. My son is just over a year and would know nothing, yet I would be afraid he may see or hear something as he gets older.

Bostonnanny said...

You can do whatever you fucking want to do on the side. Selling passion enhancers is legal and if I needed the money I would do the same thing. It's not like you are selling your body for sex or anything like that!

Shelley (yup that's my real name guys!!) said...

From a personal perspective, I wouldn't do it. Not because of the actual product, but because rarely does anyone make much dough off of at-home sales. I have done Avon, Tupperware, Magic Chef, Mary Kay, Arbonne, and Silpilda and have time and time again walked off with a lot of product and no money in my pocket.
These companies work on a pyramid scheme and it is just too hard to get ahead and make a decent salary selling stuff. I tried for years to get the Mary Kay car and never came close. I also tried for the White Mercedes Benz in the Arbonne company and while I did get to drive it, sadly I had to give it back 3 1/2 months later when I couldn't make my sales quota. :(
OP, I advise you to work at Target or Wal-mart. You will have a much better chance of making add'l money, I guarantee.

Nannies are people too! said...

This is geared more toward the parents who would not agree with their nanny having a job selling sex toys. Ok, first of all your nanny is a PERSON who has her OWN family, health, bills, home, car,personal time, etc to take care of too. So she was not put on this earth to only serve you, she needs to make a living just like you. Secondly, what your nanny does in her personal life is none of your buisness, just like what you do in your personal life is none of her buisness. You wouldn't like it if she judged you on your personal life and wouldn't stand for it, neither should the nanny be judged! Last but not least, if you and your family have fallen on hard times and put in a position where you needed to get a second job to make ends meet I highly doubt you would not do what it takes to feed and take care of your family. You wouldn't even hesitate on how or where as long as it was safe right? You should never judge your nanny on her personal life, as long as she is wonderful with/to the child or children. Sorry this kind of stuff upsets me, I mean heaven forbid a nanny be a PERSON and not just "the help."

OP, there is no reason you should worry. It's your life and you do what you need to do to make a living. Just be safe. Like others have said I would just worry about it becoming a dead end second job since I as well have tried to sell Arbonne and eneded up with a ton of product and could not meet my monthly quote. However I do wish you good luck with the new job!

Debra said...

Nannies are people: I selled Arbonne too and didn't make any $$. What a scam it was for me. They promised me a white Mercedes Benz, chocolates on Valentine's Day plus a cruise with other Arbonne sellers, but making the quota was difficult at best since many people were not very sold on the product.