Friday

The Name Game

Received Friday, December 31, 2010
Opinion 4 My bosses just gave birth and named their daughter the name that I was going to name my future daughter. They took the whole name (first and middle). I feel hurt because I told the mom months ago how much I loved that name and was attached to it. Now I will be caring for a child that has the name I have been dreaming of for YEARS for my child... Am I right to be upset? I haven't said anything to the parents and don't plan on it. What's done is done.

20 comments:

Lila said...

Don't let it bother you. If you have a daughter, she will have a different last name than your charge and you will probably not be working for this family any more.

Jacqui said...

Do you have a copyright on the name? Just kidding.
Be flattered that the name you chose is so beautiful that they chose to go with it as well. That is a HUGE compliment. And who knows if you will ever have a daughter someday?? You may have all boys.
Don't let it bother you. In this world, this should be the least of your problems dear.

Just My Two Cents Just Now said...

I am confused OP. Are you preggers now with a daughter? If so, I would be slightly peeved, but still keep the name for my daughter regardless. If you mean your potential future daughter waay waay off in the future, then I wouldn't worry too much about it. That is a long way off and you just might change your mind later on.

Tales from the (Nanny)Hood said...

Unless you are currently pregnant, know you are expecting a girl, and knew that when you mentioned the name(s) to your MB, let it go.

Or just think of it as a huge compliment to your good taste and sense of stgyle!

Wow said...

Really? You're actually asking opinions on this?

First of all are you married? Does your husband also agree with the name or do you think that when you have a kid the naming rights are strictly for you to decide with no input from the father?

Who freakin gives a rats ass what they named their kid?????? If you like the name then name your child that when you finally have your kid.

My cousin was named after my grandfather, and because I admired both my grandfather and my cousin that is the name we chose for our first child. My cousin's wife was very upset that I used 'her' name but even my cousin explained to her that they could use the same name.....which is exactly what you can co.

nycmom said...

I think you are greatly overreacting. Until you have gone through a long pregnancy, debated with dh, and spent long hours researching and discarding names, you really can't be even a little bit sure you would actually use this name.

And if by some miracle you still love this name if you have a daughter, then use it. Unless you give your daughter a very unique name (which is not always a great idea anyway), she will meet lots of other people with her same name.

Mariah said...

Assuming you live in America, this is a free country and everyone has the right to name their offspring whatever they want. That is why people name their kids Apple, Shiloh, Suri, etc.
Such is life.

alex said...

I know it bothers you now but don't let it. You can still use that name. How do you know they weren't thinking of the first name and then when you said the middle name with it they loved it? Take it as a compliment. The kids will not be the same and really this isn't a big problem. Just try to let it go. I know it will be hard but it is just a name :)

world's best nanny said...

Are you out cha mind? Try and act like you got some sense. If you ain't ready to drop a lil gal in the next few weeks, let it go. More than likely by the time you have a kid you'll have changed your mind.

nc said...

I can kind of see OP's point on this. As a teacher, there are some names that I will never use as they will always remind me of a hard/crazy/difficult student I had...

As others have said though, chances are you will change your mind on the name when you actually become pregnant.

Liz said...

The same thing happen to me..I had told my sister a name that i am going to name my daughter if and when i had one, and she got pregnant had a girl and gave the baby the name i loved. I was upset but when i did have kids i had only boys.Never got the baby girl i wanted.

Vanessa said...

Uh... Unless you've trademarked the name, you can't really say much about it. My cousin just informed me that if she has another boy she's going to name him Nicholas. That's the one name I've always wanted to name my kid (if I have a boy), and it pisses me off for obvious reasons. But there's nothing I can do about it, other than beat her to it. Here's to hoping.

sick said...

Give OP a break: it was a sort of shitty thing to do. I really hate asshole moms who employ nannies. I really do. They in fact make me sick.

Just saying said...

If someone "stole" my name they could kiss my butt. I would still use it. I mean who cares. It's just a name and millions of ppl out there prob have the same name. If names are so sacred stop sharing them before hand!!

nanny2 said...

OP- I agree that unless you are currently pregnant, it's not such a big deal. I even think it's likely they don't remember the context in which they heard the name. You remember saying to them, "When I have a daughter, I want to name her xyz." But they have gone through dozens of names and for whatever reason that one just stuck with them. I really doubt they purposely "stole" the name.

Steph said...

OP..it sounds kinda irrelevant, but I would be mad too. I know it's irrational to get angry over little stuff like this, but truthfully I hate it when other people copy what I do. It's annoying to me.

Nanny nanny bo banny said...

well the silly woman that you work for knows that she didnt come to that name on her own, and that her naming of her daughter lacked originality and consideration. just give her a big congrats, and tell her that you also love the name and will be SURE to name your daughter that when she is born. give her a taste of her own medicine

Naphtali said...

You guys are all a bunch of freaking jerks. Of course she has a right to be upset. Op, don't listen to them. I'm sorry the name that you have been dreaming about for years will (probably) now be ruined by some spoiled brat. Ugh.. That's awful.

MonkeyNanny said...

Wow I can't believe how insensitive you are all being to the OP. Tes, people can name their kids anything they want, but that was extremely insensitive of your employer to take your baby name. The fact that she used both the first and middle name you picked means she blatantly copied you. Your employer should be ashamed of herself. I can't believe she could even look you in the face.

I wouldn't say anything to her about it, but you should probably look for a better job, with employers who show common decency at least.

neva_eva_always said...

I know this is after the fact but it just happened to my niece in oct. She liked the name Imani since before she knew she was having a girl so when she had the baby she named it Imani. 6 weeks later her cousins girlfriend had a baby girl and no one's telling me the name. Grandma won't answer my question (we're not related but on good terms)and neither will great grandpa who acted weird about it. My niece who knows my temper (as do grandma and great grandpa lol) tells me oh by the way the 'new' baby's name is Ymani. Sounds exactly the same but spelled with a Y. Everyone is pissed and the girl is claiming that it's not the same since it's spelled with a Y. Sorry but my niece had the name picked out before she probably even knew she was pregnant much less what she was going to have. That's disrespectful and dad shouldn't have let her since they are pretty close. That's like saying screw you.