Wednesday

Davis Park in Scarsdale, NY

Received Wednesday, June 2, 2010
negative emoticon 1 I saw a terrible nanny today who seriously made me fear for the children in her care. Location: Davis Park in Scarsdale, NY (off of Grand Boulevard). Date: 6/2/2010, I arrived at park around 11 AM, she was already there with 2 little boys. Nanny: I think her name might be Sofia. Older, my guess is at least 40's + looks rather worn out. Either African or West Indian, had an accent but I could not really place it (was speaking in another language to another nanny, but I couldn't place the language). Medium Tall (about 5'5" to 5'8"), fairly thin (probably about a size 6?). Wearing lime green t-shirt, black sweat pants with "Las Vegas" across the seat, and a cap on her head (could not see hair length due to cap). Children: 2 boys, I believe the older was Mason and the younger Alex. Older boy was probably 4-5. Curly brown hair, blue top, very calm demeanor. Younger boy probably 2 1/2- 3 1/2. Younger boy had light blonde curly hair (very wild hair!), wearing orange striped polo shirt + blue plaid shorts. He seemed like he was a bit of a handful, but he also was not getting appropriate attention or guidance, and I never saw him do anything actually naughty. Both boys wore crocs + had scooters. At one point I thought I heard the nanny call the younger boy "Mr. Ellis", but I may have just misheard Alex, not really sure.


WHAT HAPPENED: Arrived at playground with my niece. As we were on the slide, Nanny was just behind me having a very angry sounding conversation with another nanny in a language that I did not recognize. Shortly after, I noticed her raising her voice to the younger boy (Alex?) and forcing him towards the sandbox, where she wanted him to apologize to another child. The little boy was crying + didn't want to, so she picked him up by his arm (he was dangling in the air) to move him to where she wanted him. She picked him up this way at least twice. Once she had him there, she held him in place by his arm, obviously squeezing at least slightly, until he said she was hurting him, then she let go. Many good nannies in the vicinity were obviously horrified. She noticed me staring at her + gave me a dirty look. The entire time, her voice was raised as she berated him. She never cursed at him or anything like that, but her language in my opinion was not how someone should speak to a child in their care ("What is wrong with you? You are bad!"- That kind of thing.). She then picked him up by his arm and sat him on the bench where she made him stay, all the time being loud + angry with him as he cried. Eventually she carried him over to a baby swing, sat him in it, and walked away to sit across the playground with several nanny friends. She sat there chitchatting, never looking at the boy, as he sat there for a little while. He eventually stood up in the swing + started swinging back + forth, but she never bothered noticing him. At this point I noticed the older boy half lying in her lap, and she was smiling at him + stroking his hair. I hadn't even realized that this little boy was with her as her group of nanny friends had a pack of children all playing together and this child hadn't played with the group at all. He had been by himself the whole time, quietly doing his own thing without interaction or supervision until that point. It seemed like this child "Mason" was (to her) the "good one" + "Alex" was the "bad boy". For the next hour and a half, it seemed like I was hearing her scream at him for something else, most of which was standard behavior, and never once did I see her attempt to be positive with him, give him any instruction or guidance in play, or redirect him in an appropriate manner. At one point she put the older boy in a baby swing + left him there for awhile, he just calmly sat there- I'm not sure how long- he was such a calm child + I was keeping track of my niece so I couldn't always pay as much attention as I liked. At another point, Alex came over to the nanny + started to climb in to her lap, when her friend reached over + smacked him on the bottom! I don't know if it was a playful tap or a swat from where I was, but either way, I thought it was inappropriate. Then the friend began swatting Alex in the face! I think this was intended as playful, but again, I found it inappropriate. Not too much later, the nanny was rounding up the kids to leave- I noticed because she was screaming at Alex, asking if he'd worn shoes to the park. (He was at the oldest 3, and she's paid to take care of him. Shouldn't she make sure footwear is worn to the park? By the way, neither boy was wearing shoes the entire time at the park, which is covered in woodchips + sand.) Again, she was pulling him around roughly, being nasty + loud while he cried. They left the park, Alex still upset, the nanny still being mean, and Mason seemingly oblivious to it all. Leaving the park, they turned right on to Grand Boulevard, nanny walking + boys on scooters, so they must live nearby. I am at that park frequently, so I will keep my eye out for their parents, but if anybody recognizes them + knows their family, please pass this along.

14 comments:

grammax2 said...

aren't crocs shoes? In the first part of your post you say "both boys wore crocs..."

other than that, great post, if I were the parents of these children, I'd definitely want to know about this. thanks op.

larchmont stoner said...

Im guessing they came with crocs and kicked them off and nanny did not care about the heroin needles in the woodchips.

Stay-at-home Auntie said...

Hi, I'm the OP of this item. Yes, in the description of the boys, I mentioned that they wore crocs. However, while playing neither boy wore shoes. They were only put on to go home. I am very bothered by this situation and fully intend to keep my eye out for these children + their awful nanny (+ hopefully at some point their parents). If I see her pulling something like this again, I'm calling the cops...I was second guessing myself today, didn't want to be overly dramatic, but if it happens again that means she behaves like this all the time + is probably worse when alone with them.

FrogBabyNanny said...

that's so sad :(

Kat said...

Omg... OP thank you for this sighting! If that were my child, well, let's just say she would be deported ASAP.

Phoenix said...

OMG that poor little boy! I hope the parents see this. What an ugly nasty being. I really hate it when people choose favorites. How awful. Made me want to cry

Just a 'lil confused said...

I read this with an open mind but I guess what kind of turned me off was the negative tinge each word seemed to have. I'm going to say this isn't an objective observation lol. Oh and Katlee85, what makes you think she's not a citizen? Just because she was speaking a different language? Gosh, that's just a disgustingly quick assumption...
Anyway, I don't have kids (yet) but when I do, I think I'd like to know what my nanny is doing with my kids. I remember nannies I had when I was younger (some were terrible!!!) and it would have been nice to have someone speaking up for myself and my sister.

nannykeeper said...

O.K., blown away here! I pride myself on being a wonderful 47 year old nanny and am caring for children from 2 wonderful families on different days (been with each family 2 years or more). I just need help understanding why children any age need constant attention and assistance at THE PLAY GROUND, yes, THE "PLAYGROUND". I was just telling my 26 year old daughter the other day how ridiculous the world has become when these children go to the "PLAYGROUND" and cannot entertain themselves for very long. You've got parents and nannies practically holding the childs hand as they walk through the playground and they guide them onto all the play equipment, swing them for a good half hour and are not allowed to just relax and observe their children/charges? HUH? We are raising a generation of absolute sissy children. They cannot step outside unless they are coated with sunscreen, bugspray, wearing a goofy hat and we got the first aide kit in our pocket. I remember going out as a child riding my bike through the neighborhood, heading to the playground with friends, walking over to friends' homes, etc. just as long as my mom knew where we were. God forbid the nanny sits and takes a load off at the playground and watches instead of participates, we're adults not children ourselves. I insist the children that I keep to "go have fun guys" at the PLAYGROUND. I have no problem with helping these children to learn to be creative within themselves and not look for an adult to constantly be stimulating them, good grief, let go, please. (I actually did not read the entire OP's blog but am mainly responding to Nannypoppinpills's freaking out over some nanny not entertaining a child by swinging him non-stop). I know the little guy I keep, 2 l/2would do nothing but have me swing him at the park, but I only wish to stand in the hot sun 20 to 30 minutes to do this, after that, we count it down and time for him to try something else! The "I spotted a nanny sitting" sightings are getting real old on these blogs. Try "I Spying" something else. We all sit occasionally, believe it or not!

MaryPoppin'Pills said...

Nannykeeper,
If you were a frequent Reader of this Blog then you would know that I am an Editor... I do not write these stories or sightings... so I will forgive you for your ignorance.

anon-nanny said...

repost for anonymous:

Anonymous said...

I am often at this park and I see TERRIBLE nannies here all the time! I am a nanny myself but I am embarrassed and horrified at the way other nannies at this park behave. They come there to chat on their cell phones and talk to each other. One nanny the other day (nanny to 2 boys 4 and 8 approximately) told the 4 year old that she would not push him on the swing because "he should be running around and getting exercise not just sitting on his butt on the swing." This kid had been running around for a half hour. It was so transparent; she just didnt want to stand there pushing him. It was really sad. Parents should really keep their eyes on this park and the nannies that frequent it.

Jane Doe said...

Nannykeeper,
I did the same thing as a child. We didn't even wear seatbelts. Then, of course; my mother wasn't paying someone $17 an hour to care for me and make sure all my needs were being met.

There is a huge difference in sitting to take a break and being cruel and indifferent to your charges or just plain LAZY.

Stay-at-home Auntie said...

OP again- To Just a 'lil confused: First off, how would you like me to be objective in what I saw? I did describe the nicer behavior of the nanny (such as, her affectionate behavior towards the older boy)- unfortunately there just was not much of it. I also stated in it that I was not observing her the entire time, as I was also there with a child that needed my attention. Unfortunately, her actions grabbed my attention quite a bit, as they were not only negative, but LOUDLY negative. I also mentioned that while I thought the other nanny slapping at the child was inappropriate, they seemed to think of it as playful (as opposed to my reporting that they had just done it, which would naturally make people assume that they had done it in an angry manner). I have been working with young children for a long time: working as a nanny in college, former preschool teacher, and I currently stay home with my niece while my sister works. It can be hard + tiring working all day with children, but I can assure you, the behavior of this nanny was nowhere close to being appropriate.

Nannykeeper- I have no issue with a nanny sitting at the park, as long as the child they are watching is old enough to play on their own. I watch my 20 month old niece, so I don't get to rest at the park, as I try to stay within arm's reach to ensure safety on climbers and other equipment. Naturally as a child ages, the person watching them can relax their guard about it. If you actually read my post, you'd understand that sitting was not my issue with this nanny. The only time that was a problem was when the nanny put the boys (at differant times) in a baby swing + left them there- keeping them contained in an inappropriate manner- + then ignored the younger child when he began engaging in unsafe behavior on the swing. At 3 + 4, of course these children were old enough to play on their own, + I would expect them to, unless they asked their nanny to play with them. I would have been ok with her sitting- but being abusive towards children is never ok.

mom_of_one said...

OP - I think you did an excellent job with trying to be as objective as possible in describing your sighting.

Many times I see posts that are so understandably angry from what the person reporting the siting saw that you can see it spew forth in their words.

It is typical for the OP to be challenged around here, don't let it bother you.

A mother mysef said...

First off, Stay-at-home Auntie, you need to stay at home.Based on your comments you sound like an old lady that has WAY too much time on your hands. If you're bored and need something to do, may I recommend volunteering your time doing something more productive for your community. You must have taken an essay writing class because your opening sentence; sure is eye catching and just like a good story, totally exaggerated, I'm sure. Much of the seemingly negative things the nanny did were all your assumptions and opinions, which is the basis for your entire story. "She looked rather worn out" you said, kids have a tendency to that sometimes.Did you say she should have redirected him,given instruction and guidance. You don't know the child specifically or what disciplinary action work for him.So again you're making assumptions. You also mentioned that you were keeping track of your niece so you couldn't pay as much attention. With all the details that you gave, I will now make the assumption, that there's no way you could have given your niece the type of attention that you feel the nanny should have been giving her kids.Unless you're superwoman of course. Next time you're at the park pay attention to your niece like you're supposed too. Then if you see something thats really worth reporting do so. Don't try to get people in trouble out of boredom.

Katlee85- your statement about the nanny being deported ASAP.Lets just say "ignorance is bliss" and maybe you should pick up a book,newspaper or watch a news program and learn something sometime because not all nannies are illegal immigrants.