Friday

Nanny exhausted by overbearing MIL ....

Received Friday, June 27, 2008 - Rant
Ok, so this is really a rant not a sighting. I am a nanny in NYC for a wonderful family who has one baby who is 11 months old. What I dont love is that the grandmother drives 4 hours away one time a week to come "help me". Words cannot describe this annoying, obnoxious person. First off she is probably in her late 50's and will come with maybe a bag full of groceries, (nothing she cant handle) but she will have the poor doorman actually bring it up. I mean, come on! Like they dont have anything better to do than to bring up your Wholefoods bag . So they bring it up. Most of the time when she comes the baby is sleeping. Its like she picks the time to come when she knows he is sleeping. And she makes so much noise and such a huge production that it basically wakes him up every single time. She claims she comes to see the baby and to help me out since I work about 55 hours a week , sometimes more. But when she comes she doesnt help at all. In fact she makes my life miserable when she is there. She does the laundry the whole time, or she cooks god awful health food from Whole Foods. She literally sits down in the laundry room for hours while she does the laundry even though they have a washer and dryer in the apartment. Dont get me wrong- I dont want nor need her help so I am not mad that she doesnt help me, but just dont pretend that you are helping. And the best part is as soon as the parents get home she snatches the baby from me and makes them think they have had such a great time all day. Even the baby thinks shes nuts. She is obsessed with food and allergies. She has a list of things for me not to feed him. She claims all sorts of normal baby foods are bad and that wheat is bad too. I dont know where she gets this from. She is always on the internet looking at studies . She claimed once that I was trying to put the baby into a diabetic coma by feeding him Gerber carrots and applesauce. She is always insisting that Im either dressing him too hot or too cold. If its 90 degrees out she still thinks I should put a blanket on him. Hes 11 months old. The best is when he used to spit up like ALL babies do when he was 6 months and younger and she would freak out saying he was allergic to formula and that I needed to hold him while he slept and not put him in his crib because he may choke. We have a monitor and an angel monitor that detects the heartbeat . Trust me if he ever was choking I would know. She still wont respect my sleeping routine that I have him on . I put him in the crib before he falls asleep and I let him go to sleep on his own. Hes fine, doesnt cry and puts himself to sleep within a minute or two . She insists in barging in the room while I am doing that to take him, hold him and rock him. Then she wants me to take him and hold him while hes sleeping and she does is laundry. I put him in his crib anyway-I dont have the time to sit there for 2 hours. Shes nuts. She is overbearing and rude to me. Sometimes if Im lucky she'll be done with the laundry by 5 and she'll "relieve me " so I can leave . Wow, thanks. 5 is usually the time Im done anyway. But before I leave I must make 4 bottles for him and put his food out. Are you serious?? Is is that hard to pour formula in a bottle? Plus he only gets ONE more before bed time anyway. And as far as the food, ITS JARRED. Just pick something out of the cabinet and make a decision. I cant stand her voice and the sight of her makes me sick too . She doesnt attempt to make small talk with me like I am hired help and beneath her. Shes always talking about how stressed her son and dil are and how she wishes she could help more. I really hope that doesnt mean she comes around more. She also thinks that cleaning is part of my job, it isnt. Only for the baby and my room. I pick up after myself but I DONT clean. She insists I should be if I have free time. I pretty much tell her thats not what I Was hired for. They have a cleaning lady . I could go on and on but it is just never ending.

118 comments:

Anonymous said...

Seems like you have your hands full with this woman! Can you tell the parents how you feel?
I don't know how much I could take of someone breathing down my neck like that, without telling them off!

Anonymous said...

oh my gosh! this woman does not have enough knowledge to be instructing you this way! i don't care where she gets her info from, she's wrong! the eating, the sleeping and expecially the over-dessing. in fact, hospitals always warn new mothers not to OVERdress the baby.

You need to just communicate the parents that the grandma is very nice (even though she's not) but that she keeps giving you wrong information and you know better.

assuming you haven't already, i would pick up two books - (you may as well since you are a nanny) What to Expect the First Year and What to Expect the Toddler Years.

Read over some of the areas you and her disagree about and read about the age for eleven months. start using this info as your backup and to help you feel educated and confident in your decisions. you can be prepared to disagree with the grandma and also to discuss with the parents.

11 months old is getting to an age where the baby should be more and more independent and there is no need for the grandma to be so fussy. i would tell the parents you really don't need any help because it's more fun for you to do it on your own. i really hope they get the point.

Anonymous said...

10:50
You're right. Doesn't overdressing a baby lead to a higher chance of SIDs? At least, that's what I heard.
OP, you obviously know what you're doing. Could you maybe tell the Mil to back off? If not, I would go to the parents and see if they could say something to her for you.

Anonymous said...

OP here. I have told them and they just say oh thats just how she is, ignore her. Easier said than done, especially when they aren't the ones stuck with her all day. It is only one day of the week so I just try to grin and bear it. I have considered quitting because of her.

Anonymous said...

I know the baby is napping when she comes in, but maybe you should take the baby out for a walk once he's awake. Get out of the house! Take him to a playground and push him in a baby swing. When my charge was 11 months she LOVED the swings. It'll help you keep your sanity, and it might give the MIL a subtle hint.

Anonymous said...

OP here again--good suggestion but I've tried that before, she insists on going with us. And then she will complain she needs to do laundry and will bring him back to the house. I have him out everyday and we go on the swings at Central Park daily. My hands are kind of tied when she is there she doesn't want him leaving the house.

Anonymous said...

Leave the house before she gets there.

Anonymous said...

I think you need to talk to your employers about who is in charge when the grandma is here. If you are still in charge -- and they will back you up -- then you can go on outings and proceed with your day as usual. If she complains that she needs to do laundry, tell her to go ahead and go home and that you'll meet her back there when you are done with your outing. However, if they expect you to defer to her, then you are going to have to decide if it's worth it to stay. I know how horrendous and overbearing a bad grandmother can be. Luckily, the grandmother I had like this lived across the country and I only had to suffer her a couple times a year. If she came to visit every week, I'd probably have quit much sooner.

Anonymous said...

Wow, this is insane. I would definitely bring it up with your boss--the one who is not the child of the grandmother! They will be more understanding of what you're trying to say and will hopefully be able to communicate to the spouse what's going on. But that does sound horribly annoying. I don't think I could do it. Good luck!

Anonymous said...

jesus mary of god
is all i can think of to say..lol

I would take him out before she
gets there...even if he ends up falling asleep and then i would
go hang out at starbucks or borders
and not come home until 5 :)
if the parents know then...thats
that...

kathleencares said...

I think you should talk to the parents, but you have to be very careful with your words as you don't want to offend anyone - this is their mother after all. I agree with the last post - it might be good to approach the parent who is NOT the child of the grandma.

Anonymous said...

OP here-I cant take him out for the whole day, she is there to see him thats why she comes to visit. I cant just leave her there alone with him until she gives me the go ahead because I am being paid to be there so I cant just do that. She doesnt really visit him and just complains and does housework but in her mind and her sons mind she is there to visit. Neither of them would appreciate me taking him out for the whole day while she is there. I WISH I could but I cant. I have talked to them about it to no avail-they already know how she is:( I LOVE the baby and the parents she is just unbearable. I am considering quitting because of her, its THAT bad. thank you everyone for your suggestions.

Unknown said...

Good god.. this woman sounds so bad. Ask if you can just have that day off or something. Or let them know, if there is nothing they can do I would seriously find a new job. And by the way, they know her well, they know how annoying she is. They aren't going to be shocked if you let them know nicely that her "assistance" is a nuisance.

Anonymous said...

Wow OP, you sound stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Maybe if you told them it was serious enough of an issue that you would quit over it, maybe they'd listen and try to work something out?
I know if I cared enough about my nanny that a family member was making her life hell, I'd intervene.

Anonymous said...

There is nothing wrong with letting a child of this age cry themselves to sleep. It is perfectly OK to let them cry, especially if they are overtired. I have a little guy in my class who cries himself to sleep at naptime, and he is 18 months old. Secondly, when it is hot, a onesie, sunblock and a floppy hat are perfectly fine. Depending on the stroller, a blanket can be used as a shade, which is so important for them. Let's remember that this is Grandma, and well, Grandma is Grandma...

OP, you have receieved some great advice here, and I would suggest one more thing. You work 55 hours per week, and that is a lot. I have worked 2 jobs and went to school, so I know what it is like to work as many hours as you. I would have a heart to heart with the parents, and explain to them how having the MIL there makes you feel. Upon speaking to them, see if you can have a day off, like "Granny's Day", where you, the parents and MIL can arrange a time for you to get done early (like working a 1/2 day) or a day off with pay so that you can get some time to yourself. I know MIL's visits drive you crazy, and they would me too, and I can't help but wonder if you maybe burned out since you work so many hours in a week. Just a thought, and hooray we got the Net at work! Love ya guys!

Anonymous said...

Maybe, set up a playdate at the house. Even if its only for two hours. That way maybe, she will watch how she acts in front of another mother or nanny. At least two hours will be spent with another sane adult. She may leave you alone for that time. Its like you can get a break away from her.

Anonymous said...

That's actually a really good idea, eric's mom. Maybe op could try that.
I was reading through the posts, and it just seemed like she was running out of ideas to get away from Mil!

Anonymous said...

If the parents think her behavior is alright and that you need to just deal with it ,they are in the wrong. I would tell them that if it continues that you will be looking for another poistion. Why can't that fruitcake come and visit when they are home?
I had someone like that too, my own mother. If the baby cried, she was hungry and wanted to stuff a bottle or food in her mouth. Never let a baby cyr. on and on and on. I started to make sure my car was in the garage at all times and if her car pulled up I woud take the baby in the back bedroom
and not answer the door LOL
FInally I had to tell her to stay home, I did not need her help and she needed to mindher own business.
It went over real big (NOT) but it stopped it. I think I would tell the grandmother point blank that you came with very good references, that you know what you are doing and that you do not need her help. You just need to put your foot down and if the parents do not like it find a job without babysitting an woman who is off her rocker.

Anonymous said...

hmmmmmmm... what i see is a woman who wants some involvement and drives for hours to get it. if she's doing the family's laundry every week, then she's definitely doing them a big service. she does sound overbearing, but that's life. you have to learn to live with all types.

Anonymous said...

i agree with Anon at 1:35 PM.

i believe if the parents felt that you were actually considering quitting, they would realize the seriousness of the situation. don't be afraid to actually tell them that you feel like you can't take it anymore. i really believe they will work with you to alter the situation before losing you as a nanny.

Anonymous said...

well, I am sure I will be jumped on for this post but here it goes anyhow.
The post I just read was filled with intenese hatred, anger and sounded as if it were written ,atbest, by a sophmore in HS.
Grandmas dote on babies. They are old school and do things differently than we do. It is there job to protect there families..to make sure the nanny caring for her grandson is doing her best..her very best and of course as we all know, No one can care for baby as well as mom or grandma.As a nanny that is the first thing that I came to learn.

OP..you need to let go of your anger for MIL and learn to deal with her. She is afterall the grandmother of this baby .
Why do you care if she spends all day downstairs doing laundry? That should thrill you if you really hate spending time with her?!
And why do you care if she puts the snag on JR just as mom and dad get home? Are you really that insecure that you care who the parents think JR spent the afternoon with?
This issue is not a new one. It dates back to the dark ages..my suggestion..grow up and be the bigger person.
Let her have her way for 6 stinking hours out of the 50 or so that you work..and remember..when you move on to the next job..grandma will still be grandma..her time with her grandson is precious..don't take that from her.

Anonymous said...

6:05
Nah. I don't think you should get jumped on. It's your opinion, and you said what you had to say without being really nasty.

Hey, it IS one other way of looking at it, ain't it? OP needs to do what's best for her .... to bring herself some peace.

UmassSlytherin said...

6:05,
Not jumping on you here, just disagreeing a bit is all.

If the grandmother wants so badly to spend time with her grandchild, why is the nanny hired to be there at all on the day that she comes? I do not know OP or the grandmother in question, but it is difficult to be in a work environment where you are unfairly harassed, as OP feels she is by this woman. I do not think it is immature of this woman to rant about this issue, nor do I think her post was poorly written, as you implied.

Furthermore, I don't agree that it is the grandmother's job to make sure the nanny is doing her job. The grandmother is not the nanny's supervisor, so she should not act as such even if she visits for one day. And it doesn't sound like this grandma is old school to me at all: sounds like she's a wacko Whole Foods nut. (no offense to wacko Whole Foods nuts.)

As I said before, let the grandma spend time with the little tyke, and do it all herself on that day. Obviously she is either a) not capable by the mother's standards or b) unwilling to do it herself

I think you were a little hard on OP.

Anonymous said...

umasslytherin, I know you have children from the delightful stories and posts. I am guessing here that you are not a grandma yet as you seem to hip and youthful in thought. If I am wrong..sorry. I think that may be why you don't see things from grandma's point of veiw.

Can you honestly tell me that you do not feel a grandma or aunt has more authority over a baby than a nanny?Of course they are going to feel that they have more "say so "or "power"(for a better lack of words)..that is her sons child!


As a mom, auntie ,great auntie and former nanny I can tell you that ,in our little corner of California here, family members most certainly do lookout for the young-ones in the family and grandma's most certainly do look over the nanny's shoulder every chance they get.Family looks out for family.
When a grandma is in the home she should be treated with respect. Period!
Any nanny should try to understand a grandmas protective and even overprotective nature.
It is a "mother bears" instinct to protect the young in the family.A mom does not stop being a mom once she becomes a grandma.
Shoot, when my mom comes to visit , while she does not say a word, her eyes are continually asking me"why are you doing that? We did it so different 40 yrs ago!"
She also does this to my neice and her great grandson. It is called human nature and it is normal.
OP'S post was just too angry and filled with spite to be targeting a budinsky of a MIL..There is something else going on here.Something missing from the story.

UmassSlytherin said...

6:52,
I most likely seem hip and youthful in thought to you because of the fact that I am extremely juvenile. But thank you.

That being said, one of the lessons I have learned in life is that all family situations are different, and that the way we were raised does not always apply to everyone, nor should it.

OP's post was a rant. Rants are, generally, angry. Nothing wrong with anger if it is managed effectively. OP does not seem like a monster to me.

Yes, grandparents and parents are important. But in this day and age of nannies, the "old school" rules don't always apply. If I were OP, I wouldn't deal with it, and that is not immaturity. It's quite the opposite: it's knowing your limit. Personality conflicts go beyond terms such as "nanny" and "grandmother." OP is trying to do her job, and to be happy in her work. Sounds as if this woman is making her unhappy. Why should anyone stay in a situation they are unhappy with? I know from personal experience that there are many, many people who need nannies where the grandparent does not grace the nanny with...ahem...these lovely visits every freaking week. Once in awhile, sure, put the hell up with it. But every week? I'd look elsewhere.

Just my two cents.

(still lmao at being called "hip." so so not accurate.) :)

Anonymous said...

Umasslytherin, Just wanted to clarify ..I did not feel the op's post was written poorly but rather had the immature understones of jealousy and HS drama.

Anonymous said...

UMass
Big fan here, and I would love to know how old you are. I have a feeling I would otherwise be shocked except you've given us a head's up on your immature ways.
Hell, I think you'd be fun to hang out with. You remind me of a very dear friend of mine, only she's quite a bit edgier than you .... at least from what I've seen of your writings.
You're a great comic relief around here sometimes - when it get's to be a little too much.
So, thank you for that.

7:08
I think UMass would be the first to tell you that that is right up her alley! Her honesty amuses me!

And just my 2 cents, this IS a rant. OP is just trying to get some issues off her chest, and I think there may be some resentment there, and this is a healthy way of releasing it, I think.

UmassSlytherin said...

7:14,

thank you for your kind words. my own blog is edgy (perhaps I am your dear friend, who the hell knows?), but I try to tone it down for isyn because I do not like to be disrespectful. This blog, isyn, is by far my favorite blog on the net. so I do try to behave.

yes, I do enjoy high school drama. and High School Musical as well. Great movie.

Agreed that rants are for ranting: I wish OP good luck.

Anonymous said...

Awwww, ya still didn't tell me how old you were. Are you avoiding the question? lol

UmassSlytherin said...

I'm as old as my tounge and a little bit older than my teeth.

-Santa in Miracle on 34th Street.

Anonymous said...

OP here. Umass, thank you so much for defending me. To the person who doesnt agree with me, that is your perogative. You are entitled to your opinion. They call it the rant section to let off steam and yes I am angered. That doesn't make me sound like a sophomore in high school( well in my opinion at least). I in now way shape or form have ever disrespected her. I am polite to her even though she is not nice to me. She doesn't sign my paycheck so she really isnt at liberty to boss me around and be so meddling. I do not care if she is down doing laundry, in fact I prefer it but the point is that she is supposed to be there to help ME and spend time with her grandson and she does neither. Do not pretend that you are helping when you arent. I understand that she loves her grandson and its in her instinct to protect him but there is a nice way to do it. Thats all I have to say in my defense. Again, thank you everyone for your advice. Im not sure what I am going to do but I am afraid Im gonna lose my cool one of these days!

Anonymous said...

OP here again-Also I just wanted to point out something. My parents have 2 grandchildren who have a nanny. When they go over there they stay out of the nanny's hair and they let the nanny have control and do her job. They don't try to give advice or meddle whatsoever. They stand back and let the nanny do her job!!And the nanny in turn doesnt mind them being there( at least I dont think she does). They are there to play with my neices not to butt their noses into the nannys job. Thats all I ask from this MIL,

chick said...

6:05/6:52 - I get along well with my charges grandparents for several reasons. First, they adore the same kids I do. Second, they respect me and let me do my job. Third, I respect them and their desire to have time with my charges. Fourth, my employers have told me that they will back me 100% if there is an issue with a grandparent. They may then need to talk the issue over with me, but if a g'parent does something foolish/dangerous, I am allowed, nay, EXPECTED to speak up and gently correct the issue. Mutual respect is key to a successful relationship.

OP, I think at this point you have a few options left:

Be pleasant to the g'ma no matter what.

Talk to your MB, explain the issues, and ask her whether you are in charge during G'ma's visit or whether G'ma is in charge.

If G'ma is in charge, ask if there are things OTHER than direct childcare you should be doing at that time. Sorting toys and clothes, planning out future activities, etc. IOW, let G'ma have control, and find other work to do.

And, last but not least, if you feel you can't take it any more, explain to MB that the current situation is stressful enough that you are considering seeking other employment. Ask her how you can work together to reduce this stress. Maybe giving you the rest of the day off when G'ma comes is the solution.

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

O.P. Do your parents give the nanny a break when they see their grandkids? I don't mean all of them playing together. I am talking about taking the kids out alone. So nanny can do something else.

Anonymous said...

i still think most of you are being too hard on grandma. she's making a long drive, showing up with groceries, cooking for the family, and doing their laundry for them. that's grandma doing things to help her son and his family, not the nanny. she's clearly interested in the baby if she's been researching child development issues online. i can tell the nanny thinks grandma is nuts, but i actually agree with some of what she's said. many nutritionists are now questioning whether or not this country's obesity epidemic is related to inappropropriate first foods and too many of them. many of us have changed course and avoid processed baby cereal and save fruits to be the last foods introduced, instead nursing and starting at around 9 months with veggies, meats, avacodo, and yogurt. also, i disagree vehemently with anyone who thinks it's okay for infants to cry themselves to sleep. i find that completely neglectful (not that you are doing that, OP. i know you said the baby goes right to sleep). geez, is it really so awful that grandma wants the baby held and cuddled and fed healthy food?

if it's a personality conflict, well whatever. we all have those. either learn to deal with her or quit if you can't handle it. i do wish you all the best and i understand you were just letting off steam somewhat.

and, oh my, does it pain me to agree with my favorite anonymous jackhole. heh. ;)

Anonymous said...

OP here. Lindalou---its carrots and applesauce. I am not feeding him a steak dinner and pixiesticks! I have done my research and have been a nanny quite some time I know what infants can and cannot eat. Youre entitled to side with her if you want but trust me this woman is a nutjob , plain and simple. The problem is she is supposed to be there helping ME out and spending time with the baby which she is NOT. This was agreed when I was hired that her help would lessen my hours. I would rather her just not be there, at least I can just do my job properly then! And furthermore she doesnt need to do their laundry, they have a cleaning lady that does it already, she is just nuts and feels she is helping. They have told her time and time again they dont want her cooking or cleaning , that she is there for the baby and to help me but shed rather just play the hero and "help"

Anonymous said...

Steak and pixiesticks? LOL
Hilarious, OP. Love that one!

..... Brings back fond childhood memories -- those pixiesticks!

Anonymous said...

You could suggest to the parents that the Grandma comes one day on the weekend instead of the weekday. That way Grandma will still feel needed and you won't have to deal with her.

Anonymous said...

I have to say I can see what LindaLou is saying. And I also completely disagree with letting a baby cry themselves to sleep, though it sounds like this baby just relaxes and gets himself to sleep fine on his own.

OP, if the agreement when you started was that G'ma's "help" would lessen YOUR hours, then I think it would make sense to propose to the parents that when G'ma comes, you get off early. Or as someone suggested, you busy yourself with child-RELATED duties, but leave the child-CARE to G'ma. Explain to them that you feel that in order to do your job efficiently with G'ma there, you need to clarify what YOUR duties are and what HER purpose is. I think it is perfectly reasonable to just say that the two of you are not working well together and it would be more efficient to define the roles for this time so you can truly help each other, not just work against each other or have to grit your teeth and tolerae each other ebing underfoot. Because it sounds as though she shares your feelings and wishes you were not there when she is.

Anonymous said...

OP here--If she wishes I wasnt there then she can easily say Ok, Ive got it handled you can go now! If I could just leave , I would!! The parents said that when the grandma doesnt need me anymore I can leave. My hands are tied. I will ask if she needs me anymore and her answer is always yes because she has things to do which is b.s . because she is there to see the baby and thats it, she just doesnt do it. Its a CONTROL thing.

Anonymous said...

You work alot of hours. Can you tell the parents since the grandma comes one day a week, if you can leave early? Lets say you work 7-6pm. Can you leave around 12pm. That way you can get a break and do your errands or relax. And grandma can take over for the remaining six hours.

Ask if you can do this on a regular basis. Sit down and talk to your employers. Get to an agreement. If you are paid hourly do you think they would dock you?

Anonymous said...

You could ask to be paid extra during hours spent with Grandma since it's so painful.

This would be a motivation for you to be let go early when Grandma is there.

Not sure how well this request would go over, though.

Anonymous said...

Wow OP, I feel for you. That is awful and must be so hard for you to work under those circumstances. Its such a tough decision because you dont want anyone's feelings to get hurt--but for your own sanity you must do something about it. Since its not possible to leave with the baby while she is there why don't you ask the parents if its ok for you leave when grandma gets here. Dont let her control you and dictate when you can and cannot leave! Just ask them-and if they say no gently explain that you have a hard time working with her and it would be best for everyone. I think if they understood the depth of the problem they would accomodate you!! Good luck. And dont listen to anyone who says this woman is innocent , it sounds like she is a real wacko!

Anonymous said...

There is something more to this story. There has to be, Op has much to much hatered for Gramma.

Op..you sound very young . You also have no concept of what Grandmothers do.

My mom comes to see our babies twice a month.(we have 2 under 2) She too lives four hours away. My house can shine and laundry can be done..she will find the one dishtowel and pair of dirty undies that need to be washed. She loves to feel as if she is helping as she knows our hands are full. She is a wonderful grandmother. She too always puts her 2cents in when someone else(if we have guests over) handles the baby. She also watches them like a Hawk. I would be dissapointed in any grandma who didn't!

Anonymous said...

I am a grandmother too. I would not dream of going to my daughters home and start bossing her help around, and waking the baby up from the nap.
This is not a grandmother this woman is the MIL from hell.
SHe has nor right coming over there and telling her how to do her job, making terrible food that no one will eat. The woman needs a life.
There are MIL's out there that think they know better than anyone else how to raise their kids. I am thankful that mine had a life and we took the kids over there to see her and she came to our home and minded her own business.
If a woman wants to let her mother or mil come around and take charge of her house that is fine with me
but most woman who are adults want to run their own homes without anyone causing problems with their nanny or anyone else they employ.
Grandmothers are supposed to help out if they are asked and come se the kids and spend time with them they are not there to point out every mistake they think you or you husband or help are making because "you are not doing it right" because she "thinks so".

UmassSlytherin said...

3:52,
You have no idea what this grandmother is like. Many, many grandmothers are just not good people. Being a grandmother, or a mother, does not automatically make you a class act. Not all grandmothers are like your own mother, and not everybody sees your mother in the same light as you yourself do.

Perhaps "putting your two cents in" when someone else has the baby is fine to you, but many would consider it rude and irritating. Of course you love your mom, as you should. But all grandmothers, including your own mom, are not necessarily just "doing their job." Some are downright rude and unpleasant.

Also, to say that OP has no concept of what grandmothers do is just rude and presumptuous. What grandmothers do? Each grandmother is different. As I have said before, OP works at this place: she deserves to be happy in her work environment. She should not have to put up with being harassed. I doubt there is much more to the story. OP was pretty detailed. Long story short: she can't stand this person. Being a grandmother doesn't give her the right to be a you know what to the poor girl. Plus, she's a drop-in Grandmother. Maybe if she wants to spend more time with her grandkid, she should move closer and take over the nanny job herself.

Anonymous said...

Well said, Umass I couldnt have said it better. 3:52 you could not have been ruder. The OP does not sound very young and even if she is what does it matter . Her bosses hired her to watch their child for 55 hours a week, I doubt she is THAT young. I highly doubt there is more to the story as she was very detailed and it was a long post. The point is 3:52 is that the grandma is there to help HER and spend time with the baby not to boss her around and give her unneeded advice. If MIL wants to give advice to her son and DIL that is fine but she needs to mind her business as far as the nanny is concerned. It is NOT her place . You are just plain rude 3:52 and I doubt a nanny would enjoy being bossed around by YOUR mother.

Anonymous said...

436...do you feel better now that you spewed all over the screen??

Wow..I am sorry you don't agree but anyone that goes on and on and on about the fact that "grandma is suppossed to be there to help her but is not and rather is spending her time downstairs doing laundry "(Something she has brooded over now atleast 4 times in the same blog)tells me that :

Grandma obviously does not want to be around the nanny and is sacraficing het time with her grandson just to avoid nanny. The nanny said herself, as soon as mom and dad get home grandma is there snatching the child up!!
Things are not always what they seem. Those of you who feel there is only one side to this story are VERY narrow-minded!

Anonymous said...

BTW...My mother would have full authority over any nanny I would ever hire and that would be made known to the nanny first thing!

Anonymous said...

anyone feeding a baby jarred babyfood has not educated themselves as claimed!

Jarred babyfood is horrible!

get off your lazy butts and cook your babies real food. The same things you eat are fine for them! With the exceptions of course of nuts, honey and strawberries before age 2! Goodgreif nanny..grandma is right here!
Jarred carrots and applesuace..yuck!

Anonymous said...

I have 3 children. All born at home. I have never bought or used jarred baby food. My children were raised on breastmilk and then introduced to food between 4-6 months. They eat the same foods we do everyday. I use a babyfood grinder and that is that. They also drink goatsmilk which is very good for them.
There is no good exscuse to feed a baby that horrid stuff they sell in jars,except laziness.
Any idea how they get food to last sitting on a shelf for a year? Why would you let your precious baby eat that crap?
I am a working mommy,I know time is precious but really, it only takes a few minutes to grind up whatever you have made for yourself..then throw the grinder in the dishwasher for the next day!
Since 6 months all of my children have eaten fish,pasta,veggies and fruit..chicken,tofu and eggs. They will eat any fruit or veggie you set in front of them because they were introduced early to real and healthy foods..not that jarred crap!

Nanny..the nasty MIL is right on this one.She may be wrong with everything else but your obvious anger for her is hindering your ability to be objective here.
She is right about the food!
Think about it, do you eat out of a jar or box everyday??

Anonymous said...

7:16 said " Any idea how they get food to last sitting on a shelf for a year?"

Um, yes, it's called heating and vacuum sealing. The same thing I assume YOU do when you do your canning and you make your own jams, jellies, sauces, pickles and preserves. Are you the same one who was freaking about how "lazy" all moms were if children were not fully potty trained by the time they turned 2?

UmassSlytherin said...

7:16,
My daughter was raised on Jim Beam and Lucky Charms.

Should I be worried?

Anonymous said...

i thought it was weird that an almost one year old was being spoon fed jarred baby food. aren't most babies eating table food by then? or were mine just weird?

Anonymous said...

My son still likes some baby food. Hes such a picky eater. Its easy to say someone is "lazy" by feeding their child jar foods. But what do you do when they spit out what you try to feed them?

Hes two and a half and gives me grief with eating. It stresses me out. I am always calling the doctor. The only way he will eat veggies of any type if they are the Gerber blended stage two. He loves veggies. He doesn't like texture I guess. He gags. I rather give him the veggies and sweetpotatoes even if its jarred food. I feel at least hes getting his vegetables. Better than him not eating any at all.

I was one of those moms that use to say when he was an infant. I am not going to introduce him to fast food. Oh no, everything is going to be healthy and organic. LOL yeah right!! But I do try and make healthier choices even with fast food. Instead of fries at Mcdonalds I get the apples for him, and milk and chicken nuggets.

If any moms or nannies have suggestions on sparking a childs appetite I would love to hear it. Hes not really the type interested in food. He never lets me know when he is hungry. So any suggestions on foods that may increase his appetite?
P.S. hes a delayed talker so, he can't really tell me in a couple of words what he wants etc. Its usually one word here and there. Milk, juice, cookie, apple

thanks

Anonymous said...

Cali mom, in response to your rude comment: I have never canned anything in my life. Never learned and don't care too.More power to the women who do!
My family and I eat fresh food everyday.
Stop being so freakin nasty! I think you need to send your son to grams house for a few nights and get some lovin' cause you have been a real bitch this last couple of posts that I have read! Good lord woman..pls go get laid, take a Valium ..whatever..but chill out!!

Maybe all the preserves have gotten to you!wow you are wound tight!!

linda lou..your children are not weird! any one yr old being spoon fed jarred baby food (Unless medical reasons exist) are simply the product of lazy parents!! period!

chick said...

So is the next salvo in the feeding wars going to be that homemade baby food is all things good, and jarred food is all that is evil and bad in the world?

Does this mean the breastmilk vs. formula war is over?

Anyhoo, I give babies jarred food. Organic if I can find it, but I don't freak out if they get non-organic. I also intro bits of table foods as soon as baby is able to manage them, usually around 8 months. By 12 months, all the babies I have cared for have been on table food, chopped up, not passed thru a food grinder.

That works for me. And the babies I have fed this way are all pretty terrific eaters, loving veggies, fruit, etc.

Call me lazy - I prefer the term selectively obsessive. I try to pick and choose what I worry about, because these days, everything you might choose to do is wrong somehow according to someone.

P.S. for Lindalou - it's possible OP's charge has texture issues that would make it difficult to feed him chopped food. Or maybe the OP's bosses are not ready for him to eat table food. There are any number of reasons he would still be eating jar food, IMO.

Anonymous said...

chicken nuggets are worse than a burger. juice is worse than whole milk!! good job mom!!

mcdonalds is a big nono. stop at safeway and buy fruit and water or take an icechest with boiled eggs,apples ,cheese and other goodies! kids love this and it is easy!

chick said...

And Cali Mom, you do need to watch out for the "preserves". I find the blueberry and boysenberry make me incapable of tolerating fools gladly, but I can usually correct that with a bit of blackberry and strawberry.

One to always avoid though is fig. That makes everyone extremely pissy!

Anonymous said...

Calimom. Just Curious. Do you work like 50-60 hours a week?

Anonymous said...

I cannot tolerate people who actually feel they are somehow better than others, usually for no other particular reason than that they have more money. No one should be subject to this kind of treatment, and to me, that's the crux of this situation. It sounds as though she has nothing to offer advice-wise or help-wise. She needs to be confined to the laundry room and out of your hair.

Anonymous said...

10:47 there's a childhood obesity epidemic in this country. offer your child a plate with small portions of healthy foods he likes at each meal and then let him eat what he choses. he's not going to starve and he can likely feel all the angst your putting out over his eating. don't comment, don't cajole. just leave him be. you don't want him to have an eating disorder. he's in charge of what goes in his mouth.

10:54 i think we've established that i'm plenty lazy. i just figured that once my kids could pick up food with their fingers and get it to their mouths, my involvement (aside from nursing) was mostly over. i provide the food and everyone in the house eats it whether age 1 or 43. if anyone's not happy with the choices, they can grab a yogurt and piece of fruit from the fridge, but i'm not cooking anything new. see? completely lazy!

the one thing i think i'm fairly good at is careful shopping. i buy a lot of produce and keep fruit bowls in strategic places in the house so that's what we all see and think of grabbing. i keep chopped veggies in containers right at the kids' eye levels so they're easy to grab, and i only rarely buy junk food.

Anonymous said...

linda lou,my comment about lazy parents was not aimed at you, but at the parents and nanny of the 1 yr old in the post being fed jarred baby food.

At one, a child should no longer be on jarred food.(unless medical reasons exist) And for all those bashing me and bringing up "texture issues" you can puree ANY food in a blender and it will come out just as smooth as your wonderful jarred food. It just depends on what your priorities are and the time you allow yourself to spend preparing your childs food!
Any mom trying to convince me that fast food is okay to feed to your child is nuts!
Making good choices by choosing apples and juice at McDonalds is ridiculous..a good choice,mom, is skipping fastfood all together.There is a market on every other block anymore,stop there instead and feed your family healthy foods!They will be healthier and you can take pride at working a little harder to support healthy eating habits!

Anonymous said...

Lindalou..

A little guy in my preschool class went 3 days without eating and was on the verge of passing out. Not all kids will eat if they're hungry enough. This little guy only wanted to eat cookies, candy and white bread. We had a talk with his parents about his little body needing nutrients to grow healthy and strong (he was always VERY pale and unhealthy looking). When we told the dad that his child needed protein, calcium, fruits and veggies etc.. he asked "what's a protein?" UGH! Anyway in the end I had to sit with the child at the lunch table until he finished a few bites of everything. He was so weak he could hardly keep his head up. It took almost two hours and in the end I was crying, he was crying but you know what? The parents and my preschool center stayed consistent with ONLY offering him healthy food AND making sure he ate at least a few bites of everything. In the end he was a happier, healthier child with loads of energy that he never had before.

The reason I'm sharing this with you is because although I do believe some behaviors cause eating disorders sometimes it's necessary to take drastic steps.

That being said I do respect the advice you gave 10:47. I also like hearing how you have bowls of fruit and cut up veggies within reach of the children. Kuddos to you for being so health conscious!

Anonymous said...

cali mom when you assume you make an ass of U and me!! So stop assuming things!

Anonymous said...

seattlenanny, sorry but a forced feeding experience that takes hours and ends up with child and caregiver crying is just plain f*cked up. you may think you did a good thing, but i have to disagree. what the hell was wrong with that child's parents anyway? did you call cps on them? you were a mandated reporter...

Anonymous said...

also, what seattle *preschool* has time for a 2 hour, individually supervised lunch? how did you teach the other children? or did you mean you worked at a daycare center?

Anonymous said...

OK, so 7:16/10:54/12:14 (who has been frothing at the computer and jonesing for a response from me so she can finally jump on it and get her jollies) has confirmed that her question about how baby foods get preserved was either rhetorical or just ignorant, since she has never heard of vacuum sealing and thinks she is God's gift to babies because she can push a button on her blender.

Sweetie, I'd tell YOU to lighten up and pull the pickle out of your a**, but on second thought, I think you'd feel better if you stuffed a couple more IN.

Anonymous said...

LindaLou...

This was all done under the advice of our hospital feeding team. The parents weren't being neglectful they we're young and uneducated on nutrition. If they were unresponsive and uncooperative then yes we would have called CPS. I know I'm a mandated reporter, I've called in numerous times.

If you have a problem with the way this was handled take it up with the professionals on the feeding team at our local hospital. Not me.

I respect that people have many different opinions. Your entitled to yours just as I'm entitled to mine. I was merely pointing our that every case is different. Not all children will eat when they are hungry.

Side note:

Most major hospitals have children's feeding teams. They will help with many different scenarios including..

Limited or poor intake
Food refusal
Slow or inadequate weight gain
Problems tolerating tube feedings
Suspected or known problems with airway protection and swallowing (aspiration)
Choking
Sensory problems (reacts emotionally or aggressively to touch)
Lack of appetite
Swallowing and chewing difficulties
History of gagging
Oral sensitivity
Picky eaters
Fear / anxiety related to eating

They're a fantastic resource!

Anonymous said...

seattlenanny, i'm now officially throwing the bullshit flag. you've lost all credibility with this nonsense. i live in the same area as you and i'm quite familiar with chidren's hospital here. i've know people who have taken their young children to the feeding clinic there and the advice they got was quite different from what you are describing. also, do you actually expect people to believe that the daycare you worked for had a *hopsital feeding team* for you to consult? and that you were responsible for carrying out the advice while the stupid parents stood by doing nothing but feeding their kid cookies? sorry, dear, but you've just exposed yourself as a liar, so disappointing. and yeah, if a child is so malnourished that he's falling over from lack of food and you have to call in the *hospital feeding team* in order to revive him, that's pretty much the textbook example of the kind of neglect you call CPS over. have you ever actually cared for children AT ALL, or is that a lie too? what daycare/*preschool* is this again?

Anonymous said...

Oh man.. You're right Lindalou, I'm a complete liar and I've never worked with children. You've figured me out. Shoot.. I thought I could con everyone here. You obviously know WAY more than I do. I'll hand the trophy off to you. You win! :)

Anonymous said...

nice deflection.

what daycare/*preschool* is this where you had a *hospital feeding team* (what hospital has this mobile team again?)on hand and you were in charge of carrying out the plan (forcing the child to eat for two hours while both of you wept, was it?) instead of the child's PARENTS?

if you're going to say ridiculous things like this, i don't think you can expect not to be called out. perhaps it would be better to cut your losses now and tell the truth instead of dragging this one out to the bitter end.

too bad about the lying. i thought you were one of the decent ones here. i'm always disappointed when my instincts fail me. damn!

Anonymous said...

OP here! Wow! LOL . I feed him what the parents instruct me to feed him. Plain and simple. They leave me a list of what to feed him day in and day out. SO he gets jarred foods. This is not my choice here. Once they give me the go ahead after his 12 month checkup table foods will be introduced. This baby is not overweight and is in all of the right percentiles . We give him yogurt, cheese, cut up veggies and fruits and some bread. Thats it for now, but like I said the parents are the ones who tell me his mealplans for the week which is pick out a jarred fruit and veggie and pick out a meat for dinner. This isnt my choice so you can stop the bashing on me for feeding him jarred food. I am anything but lazy and I not only have years of experience with infants but have taken countless childhood development classes in college so I am not dumb either. And for the record I am 29 for those who think I sound like a sophomore in college. I would like you to spend one week with this woman and I guarantee you'd be ranting like me( but probably worse). If she doesnt want to be around me she can #1 --come when I am not there #2 let me leave when she gets there. Plain and simple. I am a nice person and I am very nice to her so she would have no reason to not want to be around me---but if she doesn't thats fine to me. She doesnt sign my paychecks and her advice goes in one ear and out the other. Its just annoying to deal with on a weekly basis. Im allowed to rant about it. Its better to do it on here then to blow up at her!!!

Anonymous said...

OP here again--just one more thing--she is NOT right about the food. Her issues with food are food ALLERGIES-not what WE are feeding him. He doesnt have allergies he will eat anything that I feed him . EVERY jar of babyfood he is fed is organic( yes GERBER makes organic or Earth Best). So its not that she is saying dont feed him the jarred its that its dont introduce him to this yet ( whatever it may be like pork or something like that). I point out that I dont buy his food and she needs to take it up with his parents who buy the food. I am instructed what to feed him I dont buy it. And like I said before he does get tablefoods , ones that he has been given the go ahead to eat already by the pediatrician. Like I said, he goes in a few weeks when he turns 12 months.

Anonymous said...

I think that everyone is losing sight of the problem at hand. It is not to criticize the poor nanny on what she feeds the 11 month old baby. That really is not anyone's business. Who are you to say that she or the parents are lazy because they feed him jarred foods?? That is an opinion and it does not make it right or wrong. I fed my children jarred foods from Gerber and then introduced table foods. I do not feel that this is lazy. I did not have the time to make my own baby food. If you read the ingredients there are no fillers or anything weird added to it! For example the carrots is just ground carrots and water. Ground up carrots isnt the best tasting whether you puree it yourself or you buy it in a jar. Either way you look at it, its basically the same mush. This nanny is not doing anything wrong and the MIL needs to stop her nonsense. Nanny, if I were you I would just stand your ground and kill her with kindness. Best of luck!

Anonymous said...

Come on, all parents bring their kids to Mcdonalds once inawhile. I don't bring him ever week.
Twice/three times a month I don't think is going to cause damage.

Anonymous said...

I do agree there is an obesity epidemic especially amongst children but, come on. She was talking about carrots and applesauce. Lord! And as far as the McDonalds thing goes --in my opinion it is fine as a treat once in awhile. The problem with America is the portion control. Once in awhile its ok to treat yourself to something but just have some will power and dont indulge often. Best of luck to you OP. I hope you dont quit because other than the nutty MIL it sounds like you are happy with them and you sound like a great nanny.

Anonymous said...

anon 1244..you stand corrected!
No, not every parent takes their kid to McDonalds every once in a while. Some children are NEVER exposed to fast food.
What a broad and arrogant statement!

Anonymous said...

SeattleNanny, Pls do not go away.

Give LL what she is asking for.

Give us the names of the daycare and hospital ..otherwise you are going to let LL get away with calling you out, proving you a liar.

Don't let that happen.

Too many people are bullied off of here.

If your story is true, why not give the details.

Anonymous said...

7:05,
I agree: we have never brought our child to mcdonalds: it's so nasty, all those places. Wendy's, BK, KFC. So freaking disgusting. Didn't you all see that documentary Supersize Me? It's a real eye-opener, you should check it out.

Anonymous said...

Lindalou
I don't know what possessed you to act like a big shot know-it-all, but I think your behavior towards seattle nanny was despicable.

Why is it so important for you to prove her right or wrong?
There are other posters here that are wrong some of the time - do you want to call every single one of them out? Why did you ride seattle nanny so hard?

Normally, I really like your ballsy attitude, but this time it was a big turn off.
There's nothing worse than being called a liar. How could you do that without having all of the facts to prove it?
Criminals have a better chance at Trial than what you gave seattle nanny.

You should have more class, being that you're one of the more prominent posters on this blog.

Now, go ahead and slam me.
I have said my peace, and will not respond any further, so have fun with it.

Anonymous said...

That analogy is like saying that anyone who likes to have an occasional glass of wine with dinner is an alcoholic. Did you even know that they have things like salads and milk on the menu at McD's and many fast food places? A burger and fries with some soda once every month or two is NOT going to kill a child or make them learn to read at a later date than your organically-fed soy-head child.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, that was meant for 7:23.

Anonymous said...

8:16,
I do not recall saying that my child was an "organically fed soy-head." Even if we were organic and ate soy (neither of which are true of our family) I would not refer to my child in such a way. Are you 12 years old? I was merely making a point that those places are disgusting, which they are. And the salads have sugar in them: the fruit and walnut salad? check the sugar content sometime. Yes they serve milk at McDonalds. Big freaking deal. lol So what? It is still a nasty place to eat. I don't have anything against parents who take their kids there though. It is just my opinion that fast food is nasty.

I never said it would kill a child to eat there once in awhile. I never spoke at all of the reading level of my child.

Your own reading comprehension skills must be lacking if you saw all that in my post.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

I know in the private school (NJ) I was working in they had a feeding therapist. Personally, I never knew about this before. She worked directly for the school.

Also, heard at St. Josephs Childrens Hospital in Patterson. That there was a feeding team there. I guess parents would bring there kids in for feeding advice,etc. Not really sure. Has anyone heard of this?

Anonymous said...

7:55, oh, please, her lies were obivous and the whole thing is just stupid. the way she treated that child was borderline abusive and nothing any feeding clinic would recommend. i'm not going to sit idly by and be fed some complete line of bullshit.

Anonymous said...

For anonymous @11:15 Your language is totally unacceptable and makes it hard to take you seriously. Jane is evidently away this week according to what I read on here somewhere, but I feel that she'd hardly approve of your dispicably crude and vile verbage.

Anonymous said...

I know Jane doesn't like to censor, but I think that was going way too far.

Anonymous said...

Never in my post did I say the feeding team was at the center ( private full day preschool center). On the advice of the center the parents took the child to his primary doctor to get a referral to the feeding team. As far as I know you need a referral to be seen. Anyway after the team observed the child and went over the parents concerns they then wrote up a plan of action. They also encouraged the parents to sign up for classes to educate them on nutrition. We received a copy of the plan of action. The document advised us to have the child help prepare the meal and made suggestions about making meal time a non stress time. Normally the amount if time you spend at the table should be no longer than 30 min. Because this situation was a bit different because the child was not eating he stayed at the table longer. At the end of the day the child needed to eat and he did. I didn't cry in front of him. He went into the room with the other kids and support teacher and I went into the office and broke down. Go ahead and have a fit about how the situation was handled but stop calling me a liar.

LindaLou I'm not going to tell you what center I was at because it's non of your business. I'm not a fan of giving out my personal information on the internet. The feeding team was through CHOC hospital.

I'm done posting and I'm done on this blog. I've always tried to keep an open mind and tried not to make anyone feel bellow me. Unlike you LindaLou I realize I have faults and understand that I'm not better than ANYONE on here.

Anonymous said...

Seattlenanny
Please don't leave the Blog. There are a lot of people that appreciate your contributions.
I think you're a great poster.

Anonymous said...

Seattle Nanny is a great poster and Linda Lou is also a great contributor. That doesn't mean they will always agree and it certainly doesn't mean that one should leave because of a disagreement or any vigorous debate they may have as a result. Peace, ladies.

Anonymous said...

Beautifully said, Lorenza.

Anonymous said...

I really enjoy the wealth of posters that we have on this site and don't want any of them to leave. Some seem like old friends now. I do respect anyone that shows concern for those who cannot help themselves be it defenseless children or the elderly and infirm.

Anonymous said...

seattlenanny, i'm not going to discuss it any more. you know where i stand and all the backpedalling in the world isn't going to change that. change your story all you want. i know what was said. it was there for all to see.

Anonymous said...

Lindalou
So instead of being mature and letting it go, so that we don't lose a valuable poster, you want to kick her while she's down?
Well, I'm through respecting you as a poster, and I'm sure I won't be alone.

Anonymous said...

lorenza/12:40
sounds like your beautiful words fell on deaf ears.

Anonymous said...

Well look at it this way, at least it's not the mom who behaves this way... imagine that!

"Even the baby thinks she's nuts"? thats pretty funny

Anonymous said...

Lindalou
I know you've been flamed on more than one occassion. And I've gone to bat for you on more than one occassion. But here, you're being pretty mean and I'm sorry, but I'm kind of disappointed.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and seattlenanny --- please don't go. I'm so tired of posters that I've come to really enjoy, or just really think highly of because of some of their opinions, disappearing from the blog.

There comes a time when a person has had enough, and they can't take anymore bashing, and those with any kind of compassion should just back off.

Please don't go. I'm sure it'll upset more than a few people.

Anonymous said...

Bullies (yes, Lindalou, that's you)lurking even here, waiting to pounce and shove some unsuspecting poster's face in the dirt... Tsk.Tsk. Don't take it to heart, seattlenanny. Lot's of support and appreciation here, too, for your contibution. I say "thank you", and look forward to hearing from you again.

Anonymous said...

Lindalou, I have looked back on all of your posts and you are such a know-it-all rude poster. You dont offer any advice you just judge and criticize people . Why dont you leave people alone and not be such a bully. Get a life and get your fat butt off the computer that you use all day long!

Anonymous said...

I guess I never looked at it that way, but looking back on the posts myself, yes, I agree lindalou was quite the bully.

SN, please do come back.

Anonymous said...

Calimom, You stick to your guns. There are more important things than watching what your kid eats and potty training.( I saw your remark about the potty training and followed that blog as well) Who cares if your kid is in diapers at 4? So not a big deal. And people who are busy or just not into the whole"health food craze" have fed their babes canned and jarred food for ages.
You are right.
These uber moms who spend every waking moment contemplating their childs lives make me crazy. Hopefully your nasty post(about the pickle and the others I have seen you post) scared her away.You are right, she is a bad mom and crazy know it all.Blended food for a baby..really,how ridiculous.!Thats why god made jars.

Anonymous said...

I am sorry, as much as I hate to I have to agree with Linda Lou on this one. The scenario which Seattle Nanny spoke of was not at all an ok situation. There is no way any responsible adult would not call CPS if a child is SO malnourished that he cannot hold his own head up!!
The story wreaks of embellishment!
Any mandated repoerter would have called CPS asap!!
I don't like lindalou for the most part, she can be a bully..but none of you are being objective at all here..you are simply protecting one of your own and clouding the subject!

Anonymous said...

Seattlenanny, I think your opinons here are every bit as valued as everyone else's. A variety of opinons is what makes this place always interesting, and I hope you don't leave. Ihinkmost people here take their turns getting flamed regularly, and most stick around anyway.

11:51, were you pretending to be someone else that time?

Anonymous said...

12:01
"You are simply protecting one of your own and clouding the subject!"

Um, last time I looked, both Lindalou AND Seattle nanny were regulars.

Ridiculous statement.

Anonymous said...

Yeah LL is rude.. Still all you have to do is look at Seattle Nan's two versions of the same incident and compare them. What she did was not following the plan for feeding.. Forcing a child sit and eat for two hours to the point of crying is emotionable abuse. She called it "our" feeding team. What? She needs to decide whether or not the parents were a pair of yokels from the Beverly Hillbillies or people with the sophistication to seek the help of a feeding clinic. Lot's of inconsistancies here..

Anonymous said...

Way to take down the meal time stress there ~ Seattle! Lovely that you went the extra mile making a preschooler cry and gag down food for an extra ninety minutes ~ such dedication!! You must have been running for minimum wage daycare worker of the week that time ~ Did you win?! Good job.

And Linda ~ You are just a bossy snot, aren't you?! You seem bored. Get a job!!

Anonymous said...

Yikes! this is becoming a very scary place.

Anonymous said...

can everyone please just let this drop? i said i wasn't going to discuss this anymore and i haven't. now it's just mudslinging all around. seattlenanny, i apologize. you may have noticed, i get worked up at the idea of children (or animals) being mistreated in any way. my heart breaks for the poor little guy you described, and no, i don't think you handled properly, but what's done is donw. now will everyone please just let this die?

Anonymous said...

Lindalou
That's exactly what we thought would happen after the nice post Lorenza left, but you still came out slinging with your 2:01 post.

But ... I guess now because YOU say it's over, it will be, huh?

Unfortunately, I think it's too late. We may have already lost Seattle nanny, and that's some messed up shit.

I hate it when a poster "quits" because they've been pushed too far.

Anonymous said...

9:36, i don't control whether or not someone leaves this blog. if she leaves, that's her choice and it's got nothing to do with me. i don't have the ability to *bully* anyone by stating my opinion in blog comments. how absurd! your comments are just more shit-stirring and i won't be playing, ta ta. @@.

Anonymous said...

LL
You've got some nerve calling somebody else a shit stirrer, when that's all you do.
You have a very grandiose attitude and mentality and you think your better than everyone else.
Putting someone else down and calling them names because you think you know more than them makes you look really hateful and mean.

Anonymous said...

That was an intresting read. What did I miss? SN said 2 hour crying/feeding was part of a plan. LL said bullsnot, you're lying. SN came back and said the plan was really no more than thirty minutes and make mealtime stress-free. In other words, SN nanny did lie the first time. Why is this complicated to some of you? SN admitted that she lied.

Anonymous said...

Who flippin' cares .....
it's certainly not worth losing a poster over all of this.

Anonymous said...

Are you kiding me? You all can sit here and tell me SN made a bad choice by getting this child to eat? Have you read any of her comments on other posts? I can't believe she tortured or harmed the child in anyway. From her other posts she always seems empathetic to children and all you posters too. I havent seen a negative post from her. So the child cried so what. Like your kids never cried before because they dont like what your doing to them. LL you are a bully even though you say your not. Ive respected what you have said in the past but no more.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you %100 7:07.
I haven't seen anything in her other posts to indicate SN is nothing other than a caring and compassionate person.
Problem now is, SN hasn't posted since Lindalou's tirade, and I'm starting to doubt she will ever come back.
Even though I was a fan of LL's, I won't be any longer. Sorry.