Tuesday

I have three days to decide what to do...

Received Tuesday, May 20, 2008- Perspective & Opinion
In January, my good friend and I accepted a position with a very nice family in the suburbs where we go to school. The family had just had a new baby in December. The parents gave my friend and I each our own private room in the house with a private bathroom. The family provides 100% room and board for us. In exchange, they ask each of us to provide 20 hours of childcare per week for their baby. The baby is perfect. The job is very easy, it involves only childcare. Because my coworker is also my friend, we have been able to cover all the times our employers needed us and been able to keep to our school and social schedules. As the child has gotten older, I have enjoyed taking the child out to the parks and playground. She is too young to do much of anything but sit in a swing, but I enjoy getting out. As a result, I have met a number of mothers. One of the mothers has asked me about working for her this summer. She doesn't need me for the school year, just for the summer. My employer had already established this Friday as a day we would all sit down and talk about our summer schedules. This other woman has offered me $1,000 a week, which sounds wonderful. Then I have to consider that it is only from June 9 until August 28. The hours would be full time from 8-6 which is 50 hours per week. This would leave me unable to help the other family with the twenty hours I am committed to them. At the same time, this woman is not looking for a live in. I told her I really needed a live-in position and she suggested that we could work something out with the laundry room which has a full bathroom and plenty of space for a cot if I was interested. As a student, the $1,000 a week would be amazing. Of course, I wouldn't be able to take any summer classes and I would probably have to permanently quit my regular gig which works out nearly perfectly for my school schedule. My employer doesn't know I have an offer on the table. I just don't know what to do. I haven't discussed it with my good friend/coworker because I am afraid if given the option she could jump on it for herself, if I turned it down or even hesitated.I have three days to decide what to do.

43 comments:

Jennifer said...

I think you should stick with the job you have. You said it works out great with your school schedule. You could use the extra time to take a summer class or just chill out for the summer.

JS said...

sounds like if you take the other job you will be screwing over your friend, your boss (who gave you a sweet deal) and your own education!

The woman offering $1K is the devil.

UmassSlytherin said...

I think you should keep the job you have now, since it works out with your school schedule. Sometimes money isn't everything. Plus, if you take this temporary job for the summer, you will have to spend a good deal of time finding something for the fall that fits your schedule. It sounds as if the live-in situation you have now is great for a student. Don't let the money entice you, since it is a temporary position. What would you do with the money anyway: you mentioned your "social calendar." Are you a student who is putting herself through school, or is your tuition paid for by your parents? If you don't have to pay tuition, why not use this less demanding job, which has more longevity and stability, so that you can focus more on your classes?
But you need to do what feels right for you. Good luck either way!

mpp said...

I'm surprised you would even consider the new job. Money isn't everything.
You could find yourself very unhappy in that situation, and your stuck with no where else to go.
It sounds like you have it pretty good where you are right now ... why give that up?
The money will come later.
Best of luck.
Let us know what you decide.

Anonymous said...

why not share the summer gig with your friend/co-worker? That is still $500/week and you don't loose your other job. Plus you may be able to take 1 summer class?

Anonymous said...

Unless you want to be job hunting (and possibly apartment hunting) again in a few months, don't burn the bridge to the sweet deal you have now.

Room and board, a pay check, a flexible schedule, and a job you seem happy with--we should all be so lucky.

Anonymous said...

The only way this would work is if your friend took up your time shifts for the family you currently work for and you shared your earnings for the other family - maybe not 50/50 but enough to cover whatever the friend makes at the other job plus more. Does this still work out to be more financially attractive than the current situation?

atl nanny said...

Talk to your friend ASAP. It's possible that she would like to work the full 40 hours at your shared job this summer in order to earn extra money. If so, approach your current boss and tell her that you love living with them, you love the baby and your shared part-time job, but that you both need something full-time during the summer. Tell her that your friend would like to stay full-time with her and you have procured another position for the summer only. Stress that you very much want things to return to your current arrangement come fall and that the only reason you are considering another position is the temporary nature of it. It may work out perfectly. She may even let you live there for the summer without working for a small amount of rent. (Think carefully about whether you want to spend your summer sleeping on a cot in someone's laundry. I certainly wouldn't. Don't let the money cloud your eyes -- a thousand a week is good money, but it's not worth being miserable.)

Of course, if your friend doesn't want a full-time job over the summer or your employer really wants two PT employees rather than one FT nanny, then this scenario won't work. But it's worth a try.

Anonymous said...

Just remember one thing...Those you see on the way up are the ones you can see on the way down...
Money isnt everything...sleeping on
a cot...omg....nooooooooooooooo
keep what you have other jobs might come along later that are
more than you could dream of!!

Anonymous said...

I agree with the previous posters. Your current arrangements sound really good. I would not jeopardize it.

Anonymous said...

Op by the time you rent an apartment or a room and pay rent ,utilities, food gas for a car, what are you going to have left over? You need to sit down and add all of that up and see if it is worth it.

Anonymous said...

As tempting as it sounds, I would advise against it for a couple of reasons. There are too many variables that could change for the worse. What if the full-time family doesn't work out for one reason or another? Now you've ditched your other part-time job and missed the chance to register for summer classes. What if your friend decides she likes working full-time and doesn't want to go back to job sharing with you in the fall?

However if you do decide to go for it, I would be sure to get a contract IN WRITING from the full-time family, stipulating the details such as hours, work load, salary, etc.

Good luck!

just anonymous said...

If it were me, and I knew what I know now 5 years ago, I would stick with the job you have now. Another family swooped in and offered $1000/week and I took it b/c that is undeniably a lot of money for a nanny. Well...it was too good to be true and I was miserable. If you're happy now, then stay where you are.

Anonymous said...

Um ....

Too.Good.To.Be.True.

Don't do it.

Anonymous said...

Stay with your current job.

Anonymous said...

My current nanny job (soon to end -thank God! - due to family moving) seemed too good to be true (big bucks!)...and it was. Sometimes people pay REALLY well because they are REALLY awful to work for. I can't wait to move on. Beware of the BIG MONEY! If you're happy where you are -STAY!

Anonymous said...

Um, darlin, a COT in the LAUNDRY ROOM? I know the lure of money is great but please consider the caliber of person who would offer you a cot to sleep on in her laundry room for the summer. You will have zero privacy and not to mention......it's a laundry room!!!!
Please don't take this job you will end up regretting it, guaranteed.

Anonymous said...

9:46
Thank you!!! You took the words right out of my mouth. I almost fell out of my chair laughing when I saw:
cot
and
laundry
room!!!!

Are you friggin' serious?
How classy!

Hey .... at least it's not a dank basement, right?!

This employer knows exactly where the nanny belongs!
And she's putting you in your place even before you get there!

A thousand a week? And she doesn't have an extra bedroom?
I call bullshit!

DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

calif nanny....A summer only job..then what? Dont give up your living arrangement for a summer only job with no living arrangements. Cot in laundry room is not living arrangments. And if everything is so great at your current job dont let a 1000 a week for SUMMER only job ruin what you have. Think of your future..not just the money and summer.

Anonymous said...

In my experience as an employer, those of use who pay a thousand dollars or more a week have laundry rooms that are pretty exceptional. I am not saying that a laundry room is a desired location but it sounds like OP pressed the would be nanny poacher for a place to stay. Some of these huge houses out have guest rooms that are otherwise occupied or never on the same floor as the family- which would be a no no for a nanny. Honestly, I have a mud room that I could house two coeds in and it has a private bathroom with a shower in it!

Anonymous said...

$4,000/month plus a place to stay?

Sounds like a dream, doesn't it?

Beware---any employer who offers this kind of money but doesn't offer a decent guest room is suspect.

Supposedly elegant "mud rooms" notwithstanding, there's something odd about an employer who poaches nannies anyway. And be prepared to work you arse off--long overttime and lots of "extra" duties-- if they're paying that much...you will be worn out by the end of the summer!
A good employer goes through personal references or angencies.
But if the money is really important to you, go for it.
Take your vitamins...you'll need your strength!

Anonymous said...

Apologies to the spelling-police.

"agencies", not "angencies".

Anonymous said...

12:23 Are you insane? Who would work for you? I don't give a crap how nice your "mud room" or "laundry room" may be it is not a suitable place for a human to sleep in let alone the person looking after your children 10hrs/day. Get a grip.

UmassSlytherin said...

Agreed that "nanny poachers" are creepy. It is just bad business. I too think that a desirable employer would go through the proper screening process, regardless of how great a nanny may appear to them or how much their neighbors rave about the nanny. I personally would not want to work for the type of employer who hunts nannies down in a public park.

A Fabulous Nanny said...

OP, take my advice and stick with what works for you in the long run, which would be your current position.

From what I can tell, you're really happy with the way things are now. You didn't even complain about your current income; you just said you'd enjoy the $1000 a week.

I would definitely stick with it throughout the summer, and that way you avoid any sticky situations when it comes to employment AND a place to live in the fall.

Anonymous said...

A cot in the laundry room?! What is she offering you, an indentured servitude? We live in the US not India.
Keep the job you have and get an education so you can move up in the world. Someone who offers you the laundry room does not have very much respect for you as a person.

Anonymous said...

How about a mat on the floor in the kitchen. Then you can get the breakfast going before the family wakes up.

Better yet that mud room. Nothing like living where people tramp through and leave their dirty shoes. How tacky is that?

mom said...

Leaving an ideal position for some short term monetary "gain" seems foolish to me. In the end, between your job search (which you will need to begin almost immediately because this is such a temporary situation), moving, the very unlikley possibility of finding such an ideal job to coincide with your schooling...not to mention the damage to your friendship when you screw your friend over...this "windfall" would end up costing you much more in the than you could possibly gain.

mom said...

To be fair, the "new employer" had not intended for her summer nanny to live on a cot in the laundry room. It sounds more like nanny pressed her for a place to stay and she made a comment off the top of her head. Maybe she doesn't have a huge house with extra bedrooms. Maybe she is trying to put a lot of her disposable income to high quality childcare at the expense of having a bigger house and more stuff (as we always advise people to do on this site.)

Not that I think you should take the job OP. I just think this is getting silly attacking the woman for something that she was put on the spot about and was not her original intention at all. I'll bet she doesn't even really want you living in her laundry room. I wouldn't, no matter how big it was. How inconvenient. It would really cut down on available laundry hours...and with kids it seems there is often some "urgent" laundry need. Puys a large laundry room often serves several functions...all of which would be lost to the family when you were "in your room." I think the whole thing would get awkward really quickly...on both sides.

UmassSlytherin said...

I agree with Mom. The woman in question did not want a live-in nanny. I think it would be unwise to pressure a family into making you a live-in when that isn't what they originally intended.

Anonymous said...

LOL to the Cot in the Laundry room....sorry thats a little too Harry Potter in the broom closet for me.
You've gotten some great advice here....I hope you're wise enough to take it.
I think this $1000 proposition has TROUBLE written all over it.

mom said...

And you might just find that, when they realize you intend for them to provide your room and food and extra drain on their utility bills, that $1000.00 paycheck might just dwindle a bit. Live ins tend to make less.

Or they may really hate having you underfoot 24/7 more than they could ever have possibly imagined and fire you after a short time. Then where would you be? Trying to convince your old employer that, although you dumped her flat for a better situation, she ought to trust you once again?
It costs my son in college (and he has three people sharing one apartment...in Texas...where rents are comparatively low) over $1000.00 per month for rent, utilities and food. And his apartment is not even particularly nice, and he shares a bathroom. I bought his car for him, and I pay for his auto insurance, gas, books and health insurance myself, separately from that $1000.00.
You have a goods situation. Be incredibly grateful, and do not blow it. For 20 hours a week work, you are lucky to get such a nice living situation paid for and have it work converniently around your schooling, even if they paid you no extra money. (Not that I"m advocation that.)

mpp said...

Mom is on a roll, watch out! LOL
You're really contributing some wise advice today!
(Not that you usually don't, of course ... but 'especially' so) ☺
Hee-hee
(You're leaving me with nothing to say!)

Anonymous said...

stay were you are..this sounds soooo nasty..dont go for it...

this will not work out...

mimi said...

Wait...what...did I miss something.

great housing,flex hours and permanent while finishing a degree...

vs.

temp. position, a cot? and more hours...with having to find a new job and a place in a couple weeks.

Please work for the devil that offered you 1,000 bucks because you have no clue how nice you have it and I can't bear to watch one more clueless college grad figure out the real world.

wake up

undercover regular said...

Hee-hee. And that about wraps it up in a nutshell!

RedKat said...

Are we overlooking something? Are you two students getting paid where you are now or are you only getting 100% room and board in exchange for baby care with no salary? Please clarify.

Anonymous said...

You can come work for me for the summer. I have a tree house in the backyard you can sleep in. Bring your own sleeping bag and mosquito net! hahahahaha

t.r. said...

Are you going to pay $1,000 per week? You get that the money is the draw, right- not the cot.

mpp said...

You couldn't pay me $1,000 to sleep on a cot.
However ... that treehouse ....

OP said...

So much advice. Hah. I don't think the cot would have bothered me that much, I was thinking of the money. In the end, I decided you were all right. I have a good situation now that works with my #1 goal and that is to get through school quickly and with incuring as little debt as possible. When all is said and done, my arrangement is very generous on the part of my employers. The stipend is only $200 per week, but I have no expenses. I have no expenses except text books. I won't spend another minute thinking of what I could do with the thousand dollars. I don't think it was a bad situation but I am certain it would have caused me to lose this position. Okay, so that's it. Thanks to you and Happy holiday weekend.

mpp said...

Good going, OP! I'm sure you did the right thing. ☺

UmassSlytherin said...

You absolutely made the right choice, OP! Congratulations! :)