Received Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Overwhelmed Nanny Sighting
Third Street Playground, Prospect Park, Brooklyn, Tuesday, March 11th. in the afternoon.
Description of child: Absolutely gorgeous 4 year old girl named either Sophie or Sophia with long, wavy, black hair
Description of nanny: Slim African American named Nicole or Nadine (or something similar that starts with an N)
The situation: Your daughter was pushing younger kids around (she pushed my son down, which is why I noticed her). She threw sand and toys at kids and adults in the sandbox. She scratched your nanny when she tried to intervene. She barked orders at your nanny for her to push her in the swing or bring her a snack.
Your nanny is engaged and seems to be working very hard, but she's chasing your child all over the playground and the child just doesn't listen to her (or anyone--other caregivers tried to step in to help).
I don't want to get this nanny in trouble because, as I said, she's working very hard, but your daughter seems pretty out of control.
9 comments:
I hope I'm wrong. But, parents who raise children with behavior like that normally don't care how the child is treating the nanny.
I hope these people will care!!
Sarah, I think you're right. In situations like these, usually the parents are too wrapped up in their own affairs to care how their children act; after all, isn't that what the nanny is there for?
I nannied for a family similar to those you describe - the parents (well, the mother) constantly screamed at and berated the children, and in turn, they took it out on me. The mom turned a deaf ear when I told her her children were acting out towards me; apparently, she'd also heard it from their piano teacher, their dance teacher, etc. It seemed as if she didn't want to acknowledge the monsters she'd created. After the mother berated me for supposedly breaking one of her wine glasses (one of the kids threw something into the sink, which hit the glass, which broke, which was obviously my fault), I quit. My time and skills aren't worth the abuse.
Parents fault ... Parents fault ...
The family I just left had a 5 year old MONSTER! She ruled the roost and absolutely tormented her baby sister. The parents thought she was just the sweetest thing. I lasted there 2 months and ran screaming for the hills!
I am glad you took note of this. Overwhelmed sitters make mistakes or sometimes they just cannot handle their charges, and what happens? Someone gets hurt. For all of the horror stories we read on childcaregonewrong, I do think that before the tragedies happen, there was someone like you who saw something. Thanks for speaking up.
The parents are not setting limits and inforcing rules. Poor nanny, and poor child. She is going to be disliked by her teachers, and other kids.
And every parent in town.
This child will be unwelcome everywhere.
A skillful nanny and child care provider will KNOW what to do in this situation. Certain/Right disciplined should be reinforced at anytime regardless parents' presences. This is no different than in a PRESCHOOL setting. That's why there are Chaotic classrooms due to incapable teacher and classrooms lead by skilled teachers are smooth and less conflicts. Anyway, How can everyone be sure the child is just pushing the nanny to her edge? They child could be perfect in front of her parents because her parents DISCIPLINE?
Just my point of view
I have seen a lot of chaotic classrooms over the years, which I attribute directly to the frightening trend of parents not teaching their children proper respect and discipline at home before they go to school, coupled with the schools' hands being so tied by these helicopter parents who think their kids can do no wrong...so they now work against the schools, instead of with them, to try to get the kids' behavior in line.
I have seen so many completely out of control kids over the years, and it is usually not the teachers' fault. Teachers are there to teach, not to instill the basic discipline and self control that should have been taught at home before the kids were even in school.
We scream when the schools "overstep their bounds" in teaching some topic that we feel is our personal right to teach as we see fit, and then we turn around and yell when schools don't do our jobs by teaching our kids the things we OUGHT to thave taught them ourselves. It's time for some of these irresponsible parents to step up and take some responsibility for the problem children they are creating.
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