Received Friday, June 29, 2007
Hello,
I would like to report the following incident.
This was an altercation between two nannies at the PS 199 playground.
Nanny number one appeared to be from India; she was approximately 5’3” tall, small frame, approximately 120 pounds. She was wearing flowered pants, white sandals and a spring green colored blazer, she had her brown hair up in a ponytail tied with a purple rubber band. She was watching a boy who appeared to be between 2-3 years old. The little boy had brown hair and he wore a diaper under his navy blue shorts and white polo-style t-shirt. The boy’s stroller was an old Navy blue Mclaren.
Nanny number two was African American; she was wearing a red shirt, navy blue shorts, and black sandals. She was approximately 5’6” tall and weighed approximately 170 pounds. She was watching two light brown haired girls, ages 4-5, named Ellie and Caroline.
Address or venue of observed incident: PS 199 playground (on 70th between Amsterdam and West End Avenue).
Date and time of incident: 6/28/2007 at 5:30 PM.
Description: The nannies were having a very heated argument, yelling and screaming profanities at one another, accusing the each other of a wide range of bad behavior, the language used was shocking and full of expletives. All three children were standing in the park dumbfounded listening to their nannies verbal altercation. The fighting went on for at least ten minutes and neither nanny would “back down.” Both nannies appeared oblivious that they were “on the job.” The little girls went to play on the swings (out of nanny number two’s sight) and the little boy (I did not get his name) crawled away from his nanny and would have made it out of the exit gates if a family entering the playground had not called out, “whose little boy is this?” At that point nanny number one grabbed the boy by the arm and aggressively put him back into his stroller, ignored the boy’s crying, yelled one more insult at nanny number two and left the playground. Shortly thereafter, nanny number two looked around the park for Ellie and Caroline (neither of whom was in a stroller). It took her at least five minutes to find the girls on the swings.
I left the playground at approximately 5:55 PM within minutes of nanny number two (Ellie and Caroline’s nanny). I saw that they were headed west on 70th toward Riverside Boulevard.
33 comments:
Very sad that those little children had to be exposed to both of those Nannys bad behavior. I am glad that you kept an eye on those kids while they were neglecting them during their argument. If they can act like that in public, with absolutely no decorum when your supposed to be on your best behavior ... I'd hate to think how they treat those kids in private - especially Nanny # 1, who grabbed the little boys arm.
Hopefully both sets of parents will see this.
Yet another "apalled" observer who stood by and did nothing. Almost as bad as the nanny's themselves in my opinion.
To 1:18 - if someone is observing with their child also present, perhaps the observer does not want to put her child in danger. Both nannies could have turned their rage to the observer or otherwise escalate the situation. While awful, the children were not immediately harmed and in escalation, they may have been. An observer did intervene when the boy's safety was at issue.
2:20
Agreed! It isn't smart to get in the middle of this. The only thing to do would be to report it. And as you said, someone did prevent the child from leaving the play area.
This is a sad story. How awful for the children. I hope the parents find out, and if they already know how their nannies behave, how very sad.
Although we all want to believe we would have intervened, the truth is most people don't. It is cetainly better to post the sighting in the hope that the parents or parent's friends will see it than not bothering with the posting at all.
And no, 1.18, not doing nothing may show lack of initiative, lack of confidence, cowardice etc but don't compare the OP with the horrible and nasty "nannies" she refers to.
On one ocasion I intervened when a man was being verbally abusive to a woman in a shoping center, and I nearly ended with a black eye as the woman decided I was the enemy and went for me.
Please lets keep in mind this is a sighting about some horrible so called "nannies" and not about the strengh of caracter of the OP.
To intervene between two angry nannies might have them turn on you. But since atleast one of them was already treating her child callously and with disregard, you have to know she would only take further hostility out on the child.
How do I know?
I witnessed a child who was spanked on the bottom by his mother at the grocery store. I said to her, "there are so many other ways.." She patted the child's head, smiled at me, grabbed his hand and left the store with him. Before she put him in the car, she gave him 3 hard wacks on his backside.
So if you decide to intervene, you really need a plan. The last thing you want to do is make things worse for the children.
I think the fight was over a man. I'm pretty sure of this. That can be a very ugly situation.
No one said she was supposed to jump in between them, but I don't know anyone over the age of 10 who doesn't have a cell phone. Call the police or park security. Do anything other than stand there when kids are in potential danger and then run home and put it online. Even if it broke up before cops could get there, at least she made an effort.
ble, this is likely a bad nanny- but it is not a criminal act. people are permitted to swear and argue. Are you in NYC? Do you know how pissed they would get if they heard a call come in that two nannies were arguing and saying 'bad words' in front of children?
I think there are plenty of great details here to identify the offending schlubs.
I would never get in the middle of an argument between two new yorkers, and NEVER between two new york nannies. I still have nightmares over that Park Slope Nanny Photo Tribute...
April - there is a big difference between abusing and neglecting a child and a mother spanking a child. Hell, the is a difference between a mother and a nanny when it comes to spanking. I have worked with 2 children where spanking was the only thing that worked! The one child I was a nanny for, and no I did not spank him, his father did. The other is my neice. I admittedly have spanked her, and yes, even in public. Sometimes it is necessary with some children.
knl-
The difference is in your head.
People who find reasons to justify a parents right to strike/cause phsyical harm to AKA spank a child are really the most ignorant people on earth.
I got spanked when I was five years old. I remember everything very clearly. My mother told me never to sneak into the "orange flavored medication" ever again. As soon as she stepped out of the bedroom, I climbed my way up to the medication and started chewing away.
I was such a little monkey, there was nothing I couldn't climb or open. And if I couldn't open it with my hands, I always found some kind of tool to use. My mother caught me eating the medication, and spanked me. I never again ate the orange flavored medication (or any other medication).
I am now in my fifties, and as an adult, I found out that my mother is actually not an advocate of spanking, and spanked me and my siblings only in extreme situations. My mother actually advises people against spanking because she believes that some people neither have a good reason nor any knowlege of how much force is too much.
My two brothers got spanked for trying to find out who could break a window fastest (and they did). They never dared each other to break anything ever again. I am not an advocate of spanking, but I'd like to say that those who find it necessary better have a very good reason to do so because the kids will remember, and if they believe that they were unjustly punished, there will be questions to be answered.
I don't believe in spanking. It doesn't work. It only teaches kids that adults are stronger and have power over them. It doesn't teach them anything other then fear.
I don't agree with spanking either. Children are a lot more intelligent than we give them credit for, and there are better ways than resorting to violence to teach our youth right from wrong (after all we don't want them hitting each other do we?!) I grew up in a family (of 3 children) and none of us were spanked. I am 24 years old now. I was never sent to the principles office growing up (not even once, nor were any of my sisters), we were all on the honor roll each year, and I have not had so much as a speeding ticket in my entire life. My oldest sister is a doctor. I am almost finished with a teaching degree (High School English), and my other sister is a nurse. My point is, you can teach your children right from wrong without resorting to the violent behavior you are trying to prevent. I respect and admire my parents, and want to make them proud. I have learned to use my "words" rather than my "hands" to get my point across in life, and I thank my parents for that huge life lesson!
I was spanked twice as a child, that was all it took, I learned my lesson. Both times were when I had done something that I knew better than to do and would have caused harm. The first time, I was 4 and started to run into the street without looking and there was a car coming. My parents spanked me and I never did it again. The other time I was 6 and attempted to pushmy 1 year old sister down the steps. Again, I was spanked and never did it again.
Now, at 25, I do not remember either of those times. I only know of them because my parents have told me about them.
I do not believe spanking is appropriate in every situation or for every child. But some children simply do not respond to time outs. But I believe there is a BIG difference between spanking and beating.
I have actually called the police to report a mother beating her toddler in a mall parking lot. I witnessed her dragging him - literally to the point that his knees were both cut and bleeding - through the parking lot, tossed him into the minivan, and beat him. I immediately wrote down a description of the woman, child, vehicle and license plate. I then pulled out my cell phone and called 911 and gave them all the information. Another person who witnessed the incident went over to the van to calm the woman down so she would stop beating this child. The police showed up and arrested the woman on the spot. I gave a full report of what I witnessed, as did a couple other people. I also testified in court against the woman.
I do not have any children of my own yet, but you can believe that when I do, my child will be spanked if I or my husband feels it is necessary.
8:24
It's "none of us was," and "principal's." Go study some more.
wow ... somebody pissed in your cheerios.
8:24PM, Are you really going to teach English to HIgh School students? Are you for real?
7:36 & 1:36
Ya'll are just mad cause she said she was gonna spank her kids.
I don't blame you for picking her apart, lol.
ooops ... that was meant for 1:54 anyway.
Hello, I am 1:36am. I am not mad at anyone, I just want to find out if 8:24pm is seriously considering teaching the English language to HIgh School students.
7:36, I'm pretty sure it is "none of us were spanked" as she put it. "none of us was spanked" doesn't make any sense....
1:36,2:32
I was only joking, honey! Bad attempt at humor.
Anonymous 9:16am:
You don't make any sense. Why would you correct someone if you are only "pretty sure."
Whether none was or were, please do some research on the effects of spanking before you have children! It will have a much more significant effect on them than your grammar.
I agree with 12:23am. I was spanked for doing something stupid and life threatening. I was a crazy kid, and would probably have endangered my own life. The one spaking I got saved my life. I don't recomment spanking for everyone, because not eveyone can reason. Also spanking is not for frustrated parents because they may have trouble drawing the line between just enough and too much.
If your employer chopped a finger off every time you were late, I am sure you would never be late.
That said, spanking is 100 percent not acceptable.
Physical force is for animals and beasts.
1:44
C'mon ... not even for animals. Could you imagine beating a hamster?
Evolved people do not beat up the likes of childrem. Evolved people do not resolve disputes in the street with baseball bats, knives, gunfire and fists. We are the species with the brains, the powers of speech and reasoning and everytime I hear a parent attempt to rationalize spanking I chuckle. And to those people who know look back and justify the reasons your parents used physical force against you, I urge you to cut the apron strings. It is okay to admit that your parent made mistake. You are old enough to look back now and realize your parents hit you to release their own angst over being parents. There is never, never- not ever an excuse to smack, spank or hit a child. Ever.
Are you any closer to understanding?
I think it's absolutely hilarious that this nanny sighting turned into a spanking debate.
I'm betting that most of the people against it either 1.) don't have children of their own, or 2.) have the horrible children that I'm forced to deal with when I go to the grocery store or out to dinner. For the person that said "study the effects before you do it," listen to your own advice. The studies performed by UN-BIASED groups state that spanking does not have any long term effects on kids. Look at the majority of adults out there...we were all spanked and I, at least (I guess I can't speak for you people out there) am not damaged.
Oh darling, we are all damaged. Every one of us. And for a variety of reasons.
Are there any studies that link spanking children to profound ignorance in adults?
2:12 ... you gave me a nice chuckle for the day. Love your post.
As for 2:07 ...
Are you saying that a childs behavior is greatly diminished because he is NOT spanked? The child that you are referring to that is disrupting your pleasurable shopping experience is probably one that IS spanked - how would you know any different? I am a parent that doesn't believe in spanking. I use time-outs, revoking of privilages, etc. My child is extremely well behaved. But trust me, he didn't get that way over night. It takes a parent with patience and consistency to raise a well-behaved child. I was spanked as a child, and it was detrimental enough that as I grew up, I swore to myself that if I ever had a child, I would never spank it. I know I made the right decision, and I feel blessed to have a happy, sweet, thriving 6 y.o.
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