Wednesday

Borders Book Store on Broadway in NYC

Received Wednesday, May 9, 2007
This occurred Tues 5/8 at the Borders on Lower Broadway-right near Trinity Church. This happened between 4:30 and 5:15 ish. I was reading to my charge when a little girl of about 30-36 months appeared and was swaying behind my charge listening to the story. She was causing no harm. I looked around for her nanny or parent and saw no one. I continued reading. The little girl started twirling my girl's hair {playing with it between her fingers}. She is semi listening to me read, perhaps 2-4 minutes pass. Then the little girl interrupts and says, "can you take me to the bathroom?". I said, "you have to go to the bathroom?". She answered "yes". I said, "Who are you here with?" The little girl says nothing. I say, "do you need help to find your mommy?". She says, "no, not my mommy". I said, "are you here with your nanny?". She says, "No with mommy but ...{indecipherable}". I am about to offer to help her find her mom when an ashy haired woman, about 5'6 in black pants, with black pumps and a red sweater snatches the girl by the hand harshly. The woman says, "I told you not to move-why did you move?". The little girl says, "I said I have to go to the bathroom". The mother said, "You always have to go the bathroom, don't you? It never ends". The mother is now dragging the little girl away and lamenting her {in a way that is clearly inappropriate for a child so young}. The mother, {cold as ice} doesn't even glance in my direction. Never says word one to me. I felt bad for the little girl, but could do nothing more so I picked up my charge, put her on my lap and continued reading the story. Ten minutes later, we are leaving and what do I see? The same mother in the magazine section {the section with House Beautiful type magazines}. The little girl is standing right next to her not moving at all. She has the saddest look on her face and a big wet spot on the front of her little pink pants and down one thigh. The little girl had a sweet, round face, delicate curls, a white, grey and pink long sleeve shirt on and was very pretty. I hope that the little girl's FATHER or grandparents or NANNY sees this posting so they can take appropriate action. The oblivious mother's ashy hair had white looking highlights and was loosely curled. She was about 5'6" and maybe 125 lbs. The little girl was wearing white tennis shoes with a graffiti design on them.

58 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ouch. Just Ouch. That hurt to read.

jmt said...

Horrible. See doubters? There are horrible moms reported on here. This would be a good time for an incompetent, heartless mom to have a nanny in tow to take her baby girl to the toilet. For god's sake! Yes little kids have to go all the time. It's a consequence of having to give them liquids. I know, horrid mommy, you never saw a care manual before you got this child otherwise you may have decided it was too much trouble.
Like someone said here recently, you need a license to have a dog, but any old bitch can have a child.

br nanny said...

I bet that child does have a nanny and that nanny worked her ass off potty training that child!

This is why, I as a nanny never take a sick day. I wouldn't do that to the little boys I take care of.

Anonymous said...

Awful story...but I'm a little puzzled. Didn't the child say she wasn't there with her mommy? What let you to conclude that the woman WAS her mother, after all?

Mika said...

jmt I've always believed people should fill out an application to have children! Poor little girl, she sounds like a sweetheart....parents you know what it is like when you have to go to the bathroom badly-you can't get there fast enough...now imagine what it is like for a child who is so young and whose bladder is not nearly as 'well trained' as ours!

Anonymous said...

Maybe it was a stepmother or aunt (as to why the little girl didn't call her Mommy). Just an idea about what you could do in the future if you see them there again - if you can get the girl around the corner from the woman, if the girl can tell you her name (including last name) - sometimes they can at age 30 - 36 months - that would be really helpful. Even if it's just her first name.

I sent this in said...

Good point. While there were parts of what the child said that I could not hear, {indecipherable} I thought I deduced something along the lines of "not mommy...mommy said". So when the woman appeared and told the child "I told you to stay still" I made the jump to think that the little girl didn't ask "mommy" to go to the bathroom or had tried but mommy said no and stay still. But you are right, this very well could have been a wicked aunt or stepmother! The woman tugged the child away and treated her in a way that did suggest "ownership". I know that sounds awful. But even the way the woman spoke to the child suggested, "she's mine, I do what I want".

Anonymous said...

I wonder who she was? Tuesday? Hmmm. Maybe parents are divorced and have dual custody. One has child one week, next the next? Either way- how awful for this little girl. Potty training is hard. Little children need the bathroom. Especially at this age. The little girl might even request a diaper after this!

Anonymous said...

Poor baby. This makes my heart ache.

ro said...

Is this down by Wall Street?

Anonymous said...

Someone should fire that Mommy for being negligent to the child she is caring for...oh wait, it isn't that easy. Damn, poor little girl, she probably got in trouble for having an accident too.

Little sweetie, if you can get someone to read this to you...next time, sit on Mommy's lap and pee...maybe then she will listen and take you potty when you need to go. This accident was not your fault!

Anonymous said...

This adult individual must be surrounded by sycophants. How else would a people possibly think it is any way ok to treat the baby like this? I would have taken a picture of the bitch with my cellphone and plastered it everywhere.

Anonymous said...

It's bad, yes, but horrible? I don't know about that. Horrible is physical abuse, sexual abuse and more digusting things that can happen in all walks of lives, I can't bear to write. This is a privlidged girl who will figure out this person is a bitch someday and more than likely has many other caregivers who do love her.

The woman is not a good caregiver. But, then again, it's up to the parents to determine who their kids spend their time with.

Anonymous said...

154,
ewww someone is drinking mid day!
priviliged girl?
Are you the anti priviliged person poster? As in, yee hah a blow has been dealt to a person of privilige?

What is wrong with you?
I think you are seriously F-d in the head.

"many other caregivers"
what are you basing this on?

Anonymous said...

This post sounds fake to me, who would stand there doing nothing while their child was soaked with pee? Highly unbelievable.

heather said...

You must live in on bluebird lane, my darling.

Hum, WHO would do such a thing to their child?

Oh I don't know.
A crappy parent or caregiver.
Not convinced?
http://parentsbehavingbadly.com/

Anonymous said...

154--

First of all, this wasn't a nanny, the OP said it was a mom or a step mom.

Second, blatant neglect is still horrible. The behaviors the caregiver was exhibiting were also somewhat indicative of physical abuse. Dragging your child around like a ragdoll while she wets herself is really not one of those "okay" things.

Anonymous said...

I am so lost. I can't even get through the original post.

Anonymous said...

Heather.. of course someone in that "walk of life" has "many caregivers" count up the sitters/nannies/camp counselers/teachers, etc. Poor people just can't afford to pay so many other people to parent their children. That's a fact.

I agree though, the post sounds really unbelievable. Even someone as bitchy as this woman sounds would care enough what others think to clean the girl up/go home.

Anonymous said...

So, you have no problem believing that a flat out nanny would behave so terribly, but if it is a mother- we want to say- no way. Are you freaking kidding me? Are you seriously freaking kidding me? I quit a nanny job after 4 weeks because the mother- a Stay at home mom was so utterly cruel to her OWN children.

Anonymous said...

Moms like that care more about what other people think of them. Seriously. They wouldn't let her sit in pee probably. I thought the girl said it wasn't her mom!!!

Anonymous said...

CLEARLY the mother/caregiver thought the child should be able to HOLD her urine. Perhaps OP used word oblivious because the Mother/Caregiver was busy with her all consuming task of magazine browsing and did not realize that the girl had went ahead and peed.

Lisa said...

This post broke my heart!

Anonymous said...

This post makes me so, so sad. What a selfish, awful person that mother is to make her little girl pee herself so she can read a magazine. :( That poor little girl.

jennifer lecarlo said...

Interesting post. I would like to know more. I have a hard time believing that this was the child's mother.

Anonymous said...

the nannies are having a field day . . . but it still doesn't make this site isawyourmommy . . .

Anonymous said...

I will go the two parks tomorrow in an attempt to secure a solid nanny sighting. perhaps complete with pics. I am not comfortable with this post.

Anonymous said...

yes, someone would do this. it could have been a mom, nanny or stepmother. the person would have to be annoyed by the child and just a wee bit sadistic. don't tell me you don't know any sadistic people!

Anonymous said...

I have several comments so I will post them all at once.

11:44- LOL@sit on mommy's lap and pee

1:54- whatever. If this was a nanny people would be all over it calling it horrible and a disgrace to the nanny profession. But since it wasn't then it's not that horrible. I guess 85% of the posts on here about nannies shouldn't be thought of as horrible either then right? Or is it because nannies are paid that they should treat the kids better? Parents, step parents and family members can treat kids however they want?

2:24 & 3:33- oh yeah MUST be fake since it wasn't a nanny huh? **rolling eyes**


3:49-after all this typing I read your post lol I AGREE!!!! They jump on the bandwagon when it's a nanny. Everything is taken as truth, but ohhhhh never could it be true since a nanny isn't involved!
Disgusting!

6:39- that's right! there are moms and family members who suck! i bet you nanny haters don't like that now do you? LOL there doesn't have to be an isawyourmommy site....we know you sorry moms exist. it's just most of you hide behind the (fake im-a-great-mom) smiles in public and save the real you for at home!

Anonymous said...

A friend of mine told me a story once where he was working in a block buster, and a little girl kept begging the mom, and telling her that she had to go to the bathroom. The mother told her to wait repeatedly and the little girl kept begging to go.

My friend over heard this, and finally, when the little girl peed herself, he went over to the mother and told that she had to mop the floors. "Store policy."

I think that is awesome. If more people would put bad parenting, whether it be nanny or parents, in their place at the time it happened, the embarassement alone would possibly cause it to never happen again.

Though I admit, I don't think I would have had the nerve to tell the mother to go "Clean it up." But I would have given her the evil eye and then regreted not doing anything for a very long time.

first wive's club said...

Dollars to donuts, this was the father's girfriend, fiance or less likely new wife. She probably volunteered to take the dd to the bookstore (in an attempt to woo him). Probably told him she would read to the little girl or take her to story time. It makes sense that only an up to no good, evil snake charmer would mistreat a child like this and then when she met back up with her boyfriend-fiance, etc. she could look totally worn out and roll her eyes at his DD like "look what I went through for you".

We see it all the time.
Mothers who think you need to nanny cam the nanny or do surprise check visits on the nanny, do know you should do the same to Daddy's new girlfriend. And not when Daddy is around. And especially if the woman is younger!

tinka2u said...

For the idiot who doesn't think this is "horrible", are you forgetting about the humiliation that little girl endured, along with the discomfort?

jmt said...

To all the nannies who bash this site: There are lots of bad, incompetent parents. The children are stuck with them, short of a family court removal. What is preventable is hiring a bad nanny. If the bad nanny manages to get hired, then blogs like this help drag them out into the open so they can be replaced. Outing horrid parents to their community is simply a bonus.
Remember the goal is to protect those who can't help themselves. If you aren't a rotten nanny, you have nothing to fear and everything to gain when your profession is rid of it's worst members.

Anonymous said...

I CANT BELIEVE SOME OF THESE PEOPLE. I mean theres women or men defending this woman. It does'nt matter wether shes the girls mother, aunt, step mom, care giver, or magical immaginary friend for God's sake. SHES A LITTLE GIRL! Get this through your heads a little girl, and yes there are bad moms out there and just because your a good mom does'nt mean everyone else is. I was heratbroken to hear about the girl. Bottom line it's wrong and you would have to be an idiot to deny that.

Anonymous said...

Well said, JMT!

Anonymous said...

Oh yes! there are really bad moms out there. Three years ago, I was walking on the Upper East Side of Manhattan (78th Street & Lexington) in NYC in the evening, and was waiting for the light to say "go" so I could cross the street. Way behind me was a woman who was frantically calling out to her son "Pablo!". Little Pablo was approx 5 years old and running to cross the street. He ran past me, and was crossing the street despite the rushing traffic, I came to the rescue by quickly pulling him back so he did not get run over. I said don't cross yet, you'll get hurt! He was still trying to cross, so I held his hands & waited for the mother. The mother yelled at me instead, and screamed "He wasn't going to cross the street!" Next time I see a little brat trying to cross a busy street, I will look the other way. I am sorry, but this woman yelled at me for saving her kid, and it haunted me. The witch made it look like I was going to snatch her unruly kid.

Anonymous said...

This could have been the mom, many moms treat thier kids like this, as bad as it is to think. Like were I come from, Flint Michigan some people do much worse things than just make a kid pee on themselfs. Its not right but it could have been the mom, maybe not. It could have been a cousin or aunt just babysitting.

Anonymous said...

i vote that it was a skanky girlfriend.

Anonymous said...

I forwarded this post to everyone I know in the NYC and surrounding area. Whoever the adult was- mom, stepmom, girlfriend, aunt- needs her sadistic, selfish behavior outed. This woman should not be left alone with an animal, let alone a child. Perhaps when she is elderly and in need of care, this girl will allow her to urinate on herself in public and then sit in it....something for sadistic caregivers, be it parents, stepparents, girlfriends or nannies, to think about.

For the person who said she was privileged...how is be treated cruelly, ignored and having to pee on oneself a privilege? Grow up. This womans behavior was despicable.

Anonymous said...

Pablo's mother was just trying to get him run over so she could get on with her pathetic life.

Anonymous said...

i didnt read all the posts, so i dont know if anyone has brought this up, but GO TO THE POLICE when you witness this. file a report and describe the people to them etc. take a picture with your phone if you have one.. i agree about getting some information about the girl if you can. this sounds a lot like The Boy Called It, if anyone has read that... we have to TAKE ACTION

Anonymous said...

I work at a major retail store. You'd be surprised by some of the stories I could tell. Don't be so quick to think this post is so unbelievable that it couldn't possibly be true. I have seen worse. Some offenders are caregivers, some parents or relatives. The bottom line is that it doesn't matter who the person is, wrong is wrong. We have called the police to the store on many occasions. One couple brought an infant into the store in just a diaper and a tee shirt while they were all decked out in parkas and winter clothing because there was 6 inches of snow on the ground. The cops made the mother drive home for warm clothing for the baby to wear before they were allowed to leave the store. (Yes, charges were pressed against them although we never know the outcome.) I see children walking around the store with wet britches all the time. Accidents happen, but it is cruel and humiliating to make the child remain like that while the adult continues to browse. Small comfort is the fact that the woman kept the child by her side after that. Many parents will drop their kids off in the toy or music department and pick them up when they are ready to check out. Last summer we had a 4 year old in the office for about 2 hours before her parents realized that they had left the store without her. While the police were also called for that incident, I believe the parents were let off with just a warning.
When my daughter was younger, even after she was potty trained, she felt the need to visit every restroom we passed while we were out and about. I'd get frustrated and tell her that I didn't jump in the car to drive out and use the bathroom, but we'd go to the restroom anyhow. And if the store had 2 restrooms, we'd go to both of them. Frustrating and inconvenient, yes, but still not a big deal. The store didn't sell out of groceries while we were in the bathroom.

jmt said...

Re: the Pablo thing. LOL @ foiling the mom's plan to be rid of the pesty Pablo!

And no good deed goes unpunished, right? It's humbling to have a stranger help with your child (keeping him from getting killed, no less!). She probably cleansed herself of all traces of humility ages ago. All that's left is defensiveness and anger. Stupid. We all need help now and then. All she had to do was smile and say "Thanks!"

Anonymous said...

There is no such thing as mothers vs. nannies. Is there? I mean aren't we all just a little sick with the fact that children are not free to be children anymore? They are being preyed upon by strangers and abused by the people who in some cases are being paid $20 an hour to look after them? I am a mother and anyone who mistreats a child gets on my S list. Nannies, don't fool yourselves- we mothers know who the "bad" mothers among us are. And if you think what you have read here is troublesome, you should hear what I have heard over espresso and sponge cake. No one gets railed like a mother who fails to protect or demonstrate affection for her own children. These women are lepers living among us. These women are the reason the term "frenemy" was born.
Please don't ask me to have respect for a nanny not doing the job she is paid to do. I won't do it. But do know, I cut mothers NO slack! No one is perfect but some parents really are getting away with m u r d e r.

Anonymous said...

People on here are such liars. Who in their right mind leaves a kid in wet clothes? Secondly if it is true mind your business. The story probably got changed like 5 times before it was put on here just like everything else. What are you accomplishing by posting your story here? And why does she have to acknowledge that you were there? Maybe she thought you were a pedophile. I would if you were staring at my kid. Maybe its a lesson for the mom to make sure her kid goes to the bathroom before they leave home, because if you don't you might have the parent police after your ass!

Anonymous said...

oh angry nanny, i just read your commment on another post. you are as redundant as you are confused.

Anonymous said...

I'm not angry, its just funny that people see something and run to their computers to report it. Are they looking for approval from someone. If they are sick of seeing people "abuse" these kids go volunteer at a shelter for abused kids or a homeless shelter. Then you will see something. But if there was REALLY a kid getting abused no one would do a damn thing about it. They would say "I'm not getting involved" See it all the time. And for your info I am not a nanny.

Anonymous said...

why do some of you people think this is sooooo unbelievable?? What the heck is wrong with you, do you live in fairy land where nothing bad ever happens? I can tell you horror stories that you obviously wouldn't believe, parents, nannies, step parents relatives, etc. do all kinds of horrible things to children, have you seen the news, have you ever talked with an abused child? What this caretaker (parent or whoever) did was NEGLECT. Neglecting a childs NEED to use the bathroom, ignoring her, yelling at her, humiliating her, and letting her sit in her pee, which i would imagine after a while would be rather painful with the rash that would be forming.

And for the one who said this child is privledged, YOU are one SAD individual, i imagine you only say that because that is how you (would) treat your own children, or the children you are around.

Anonymous said...

I think that the person who described the poor child as priviliged is the same person who was conflicted about whether she was rich, white, affluent, upper class or a minority.

To me, that statement shows a sadistic bias. A hatred towards anyone who you perceive to have more than you.

I don't care what you feel about the parents, caregivers and adults- these children are innocent!

Anonymous said...

To those who think it's ridiculas to think a parent would keep on shopping after a child has peed on themselves. It happens. Mt mom did it to me. I was little and I told my mom I had to go bad while we were grocery shopping, unfortunately I didn't make it to the bathroom in time and I peed on myself. My mom kept on shopping with 5 kids in tow, one wet with pee. I was 5. I am 33 and still have that embarrasment etched in my memory.

Anonymous said...

2:44 are you kidding me?? You're 33 and it still bothers you?? You don't need this blog then you need Dr. Phil.

sprak said...

If this WAS a mother, I wish her the worst Mother's Day possible.

sprak said...

If this WAS a mother, I wish her the worst Mother's Day possible.

jmt said...

2:44 I believe that you still feel the embarrassment from when you are five. You were humiliated, that stays with you.

Anonymous said...

The last time I wet my pants (in the daytime) I was three. My mother put a diaper on me and made me go stand outside. Yep, that humiliation stays with me to this day. I am in my fifties. So, don't tell me anything about what humiliation can do to a child's self esteem forever.

Anonymous said...

Maybe you all should start a support group for pissing your pants. So now lets start swaping stories about how we all peed our pants and how bad our parents made us feel afterwards. Bunch of crazies on this site. Including me because I am actually commenting on this crap.

jmt said...

Lovely, 10:33.
I suppose your childhood was a rosy memory unblemished by any harsh feelings. You must be so very well adjusted.
But then where does all that angry, bitter venom come from?

Anonymous said...

10:33 Actually you were commenting on pee but brought up crap. Crapping one's pants is another story. Nicknames are derived from such incidents. I know one guy in his thirties, still known as Shit Fingers.