Mother seeks advice regarding succesful nanny search....

Received Friday, March 9, 2007
I am a mother in Riverside, CT and because the agency we have worked with has not produced any viable candidates, I found myself searching Craig's List this afternoon. Mostly, out of curiosity as I had been warned. Most notably, I had been warned by both agencies that I signed up with.
One agency charges $3500 to find a nanny and the other charges $4200.
Imagine my surprise to see ads such as this:

Wonderful Westchester Family Seeking Experienced Nanny...
Reply to:
Date: 2007-03-09, 2:46PM EST
Nice Westchester Family seeking a live in or live out nanny for four active children. Must have experience working with multiple children close in age and physically fit to keep up with the children. Hours are long with a break during the day. Must drive. Great family, nice opportunity. If you are qualified for this position please e-mail You MUST send a resume; only candidates that send a resume will be considered.

This is NOT the agency that I am working with, but never the less; I found this to be quite disconcerting. If the nanny has a resume and is ready for work and I pay for the background check myself, what is the agency doing? I can go online to a link on this very page and get my own background check (for $49.99). Money is not the issue, but I don't understand what I am paying for? And why are the agencies warning us against using free tools like Craig's List? And why have had I no success in finding my ideal candidate?

Mothers & Fathers, I beg of you. Lend me your expertise. Does this sound legitimate to you? I want a kind, happy, active, intelligent, swimming, driving & fun person who speaks proper English. Salary is open for the right candidate and I think that I am a good employer! Why is this so hard?


Anonymous said...

maybe you're not?

Anonymous said...

The agencies don't want you to go on Craigslist, because you might find a nanny on your own, and they won't get their fee. I have posted for myself on Craigslist, and been contacted by agencies that saw my ad there, and wanted to place me.
I suggest you place an ad with a thorough job description, including things such as fluent English, college graduate, on the books and anything else that will help eliminate candidates you would not consider. You will get a lot of responses, and most will not be suitable, but you may find the right one.
This is a bad time of year to be looking, as most nannies change positions either at the beginning of the school year, or the start of summer vacation. Good Luck,
A nanny

Anonymous said...

The only thing I know of Craigs list has to do with the woman who posted she lost her husband to a woman who he found on CL to blumpkin him.

I don't get the correlation between a sex site and childcare?

Anonymous said...

Nanny Agencies used to be the only way to go. Now with the advent of the internet they are absolutely non essential!

This ad doesn't even read well. I am sure the family requires SOMETHING other than a driver? I would hope.

DFO said...

The right nanny is better than the sleekest handbag or a swiss chalet.
In fact, the right nanny makes your whole life work better!

I know because I have it!
Thank you, Elena!

Anonymous said...

Craigslist is like the classified ads in your newspaper. In fact, they are quickly *completely replacing* the classified ads in your newspaper. There are "adult" sections of craigslist, but most of it is people buying and selling furniture, placing help wanted ads, etc., etc.

Anonymous said...

I answered an ad like this on Craigs list and after I went through the (very brief) interview process- the coordinator told me she was checking "walk in" as for how I got there. She specifically said "craigs list leaves a bad taste in some of our client's mouths"

Anonymous said...

You're describing my last nanny. If you find her, tell her to leave that bum of a husband and come back and work for us!


Anonymous said...

I'm perplexed... What specifically do the agencies "warn" will happen if you use Craigslist? I used CL to find my son's nanny... it's just a type of classified advertising, so what's the big deal? - Mom in San Francisco, CA

Anonymous said...

I think Craig's List is better than agencies. Look at your agencies fee agreement very closely. Most of the agencies claim they give you a "trial period" or a "guarantee" however their agrements say you have to pay before the candidate starts and then you can't get your money back if the person is horrible. They will help you find a replacement, but if their candidate pool is poor, why would you want a replacement from them? If they really did a good job of finding quality candidates, they would stand behind them better. If you have no issue with paying high fees, I would look at the English Nanny and Governess school at least that group are candidates who invested in acquiring the training and education to be professional nannies. I was impressed when I spoke to their placement office, but the fees (and salaries) are beyond what I can afford.

Mel said...

I have been warned about Craigs List Horror Stories by the agency I used to find my "baby nurse".

But this ad? Are they kidding with that? Looks like a rush job to me. Their qualifications are so open, basically all you have to do is be able to walk and drive. I think there are a number of cabs listed alphabetically in the yellow pages that can do that job.

Raise the bar!

And this person just sits back and waits for resumes to come in from nannies?

I just do not understand. I am happy with the baby nurse I have. I have learned so much from her, mostly how the business works. She told me that she was given 2 hours of down time during her last 24 hr a day, 7 day a week gig and during the 2 hr break while the mother had the child, the child fell of the changing table and broke his shoulder AND THEN tried to blame HER.

So when I look at such a broad ad like that, I am concerned for the people who will respond to it. Finding a nanny job is not something to rush. Finding a nanny or baby nurse is not something to rush. And just as I required three references from my baby nurse, I also gave her the phone number of the baby nurse I used in 2004 for my twins.

Just like hiring the wrong person can be determental for a family, accepting the wrong job can have life long complications for a well intentioned childcare provider.

If the my present baby nurse hadn't worked in a house where a full time housekeeper was employed, she may have very well lost her ability to work with children!

Gretchen said...

dear Op,
I think there are a number of reputable agencies that headhunt professional nannies in more respectable ways. I don't think it is at all a positive reflection for an agency to advertise on Craigs List. Frankly, it looks like begging. I reside outside of Boston. Get a copy of Town & Country Magazine and look at the agencies that advertise in the back of that magazine. Those are the most desirable agencies. They are used to working with upscale clientel. Since you said "salary is open for the right employer" I am led to believe that money may not be an issue. Spend the very most you can securing the best care you can for your children. One day they will thank you for it.

Anonymous said...

I would never, ever hire a nanny through an agency. There is no reason to. I am more than willing to personally screen candidates, do a background check, check references, etc. In fact, I *insist* upon it in order to be sure that it was done correctly.

My boss can share a horror story with you about someone she hired through a reputable agency. I'll spare you the horrible, sad details. In a nutshell, she is suing the bejesus out of them.

The only think I don't like about Craigslist is that it attracts a HUGE number of dummies lurking there.

For instance, my ad said "POLISH SPEAKING NANNY ONLY" in the subject line" and I had a good dozen Caribbean nannies apply. And no, they did not speak a lick of Polish.

In the end I hired an amazing nanny from Craig's List and I have had several friends who have done the same.

Incidently, the nanny I hired doesn't like agencies either. The one bad family she encountered out of 6 was through an agency.

Anonymous said...

"She told me that she was given 2 hours of down time during her last 24 hr a day, 7 day a week gig and during the 2 hr break while the mother had the child, the child fell of the changing table and broke his shoulder AND THEN tried to blame HER."

Newsflash: it is imposible to survive on 2 hours of sleep per day for an extended period of time, sucker.

Anonymous said...

newsflash poster,
are you an idiot?
Babynurses get paid to work 24 hours a day. They SLEEP with the baby in the room. Of course they get to sleep when the baby is sleeping but the OR was talking about a situation that occurred when the mother specifically requested to have the child with her!
You sound like the fool!

Anonymous said...

Many agencies have their jobs listed on craigslist- it's nothing new.
Since I have delt with most nanny placement agencies or have nanny friends who have- I can tell you the agencies that list their jobs on craigslist usually have a bad rep.- and are known for sending unqualified nannies to clients.

Do you research into the nanny world-
just google - "hiring a nanny" and you'll find lots of helpful sites with great info.
Another good way to learn about the "real nanny world" is to contact a nanny support group-

By not using a nanny agency you can save $3,000-$10,000.
Really what the heck does a nanny placement agency really do that is worth thousands of dollars? take that money and put it toward the salary for a highly qualified nanny.

For a list of nanny support groups throughout the US-
visit this link:

or just do a search for
nanny support groups and your state

Anonymous said...

The only possible excuse this agency could have is if the family they are placing the ad for is a problem family. For example, most agencies will give you a refund after x number of days or find you a replacement if the nanny doesn't work out after 30 days.
A 30 day guarantee means the agency isn't going to be choosey if the family cant make things work with the family. Also, consider that sometimes things dont work because of the employers- not the nannY!

nanny in Baltimore said...

As a nanny who works with an upscale agency, I can tell you that I would find it personally insulting if I was sent over for an employer's review along with some incompetent and inexperienced person lifted from Craig's List.

I went to an agency specifically because I have an education, 10 years of experience and I have certain qualifications I demand of my employers. Rather than coming off as demanding, I use the agency I use because they only deal with affluent and upscale people and because they represent me as well as the family.

And I always ask for family references. Most families are more than happy to have you speak with their regular sitter or former nanny. And good families usually have a period of orientation where the new nanny has a lapse over with the old nanny. But I think most of this is over the heads of anyone that thinks advertising on Craigs List is any way okay!

Ask yourself this- if it is a nanny's market (and it is) why wouldn't a truly experienced, well referenced nanny use an agency to broker a deal for the most money, healthy insurance and benefits?

Answer- they wouldn't.

hannah said...

I would not pay 10 K for an agency to post a vague and crappy ad on a (virtual) sex site for me! Are you kidding?
Why not post a more discriminating and detailed ad yourself on Craigslist?
OP, thanks for bringing this to my attention. Some news person should scour CL and blast these agencies for these practices!

I can't believe that's a real ad!
PostingID: 291200975

hannah said...

dear nanny in baltimore,
i think you meant
they WOULD.

Anonymous said...

I am confused by the ad OP posted which I clicken on & saw on Craigs list. It is so vague. Seems to require nothing besides driving and a very general fitness. I have to wonder what kind of nannies does this agency have on file that those on file don't fit this basic job description. Live in OR live out?

Anonymous said...

maybe they tell you not to look at craigslist because they put a lot of their ads up there and they do not want you seeing that they are doing something that you could very well be doing yourself.

Anonymous said...

To the nanny in Baltimore,
If you would be insulted by interviewing alongside people who post on craigslist, then you need to get over yourself. That is just ignorant. Craigslist is a classified ad board, nothing more, nothing less.
Childcare, (yes, the nanny profession included) is a very interesting field in that there are many different people who are in it: you may find the best nanny in the world who is not educated, and likewise you may meet an extremely educated woman who is not the kind of nanny you would want. It really depends on finding a match for your child and for your family. You can find that on craigslist. Of course there are bad experiences: I myself nannied for a family I found on craigslist and they turned out to be a horrible family to work for. However the teaching job I have now is one I also found on CL.
As far as the ad in question, what is wrong with it? The interview process is quite lengthy. As a mother, (and I am one!) I would want to sift through as many nannies as I could before I chose the right one.

bw said...

As a father of two children who went through this same experience and is currently in litigation; I do have an issue with the ad. I think one of the respondants nailed it head on, because we were in a similiar situation.

We had one nanny quit after 3 days. The next nanny quit after getting her paycheck the second week. The nanny agency per their contract was obligated to find us a replacement or REFUND us the money. They chose to expand their candidate pool to lasso in more incompetent, unqualified morons than you could shake a fist at.
When I called the agency and asked what was going on and why she bothered to send us such candidates, she said "There have been complaints about your wife and quite frankly I don't think the kind of nanny you are looking for would be interested in working with your wife". She then explained her policy on refunds and the fact that she had already filled our position twice (after expending great time and resources) and said that she thought they should REWRITE their refund policy to include a disclaimer that invalidated the refund clause if a parent was "difficult or emotionally impaired". This obviously ended our relationship with that agency and we had to began litigation to get our $4000.00 returned to us.

Anonymous said...

I don't know what to tell you. As a reader of this blog, I do notice that many of the stories have to do with children 4 and under.
I just hope the four children mentioned in this ad are old enough to speak up for themselves if something is not right.
All parents need to teach their children to speak up for themselves and especially to report behaviors in the sitter that frighten, alarm or even make them uncomfortable.
Listen to your children.

Rhea said...

This doesn't sound legitimate.
I don't understand why with such a vague job description the agency doesn't have people to fit this job description. I would be more concerned if I were the nanny answering this ad than I would as the parent.

Anonymous said...


You're a bigger sucker than I thought.

--someone who knows baby nurses all too well

Anonymous said...

As a nanny I can tell you that the agency might not do all they tell you they do.

For my first nanny job I went through an agency. They family paid the agency $2500 to place a qualified, background checked, reference checked nanny (makes it easier so they don't have to do it).

Well, the agency never rana background check - never asked for my social or fingerprints to do it. They never checked my references either. They simply took the 20 pages worth of application and repetitive questions and faxes it over to the family. It was then up to them to run a background check and call references.

Anonymous said...

I've used CL to find many of my of my previous nannies told me about it. I just make sure to do a background and driving check on the applicant, and then really make sure they mesh well with my family.

Anonymous said...

I will find you a nanny for $500.
cash in my pocket!
I'll weigh her, measure her, finger print her, Run a background check on her, even spring for a liscence plate for her stroller.
Of course, I would use Craigs List.
Agencies are for suckers!

Anonymous said...

The nanny should get the money as a signing bonus. 925 is correct. Agencies do nothing but bombad nannies with 20 page applications. The nanny is the one who has to sit and fill it out. Then all the agency does is fax it over to thed family. And even though the agency I used said they did background checks, something came up within 2 months of my nanny being with us that brought to light her criminal history. Never underestimate the power of the scorned boyfriend who tipped us off. The nanny agency claimed it was an oversight on their part, a technical error. Not buying it. If you work with an agency (and I would never again), you paid for the background check, it should end up in YOUR hands!

Anonymous said...

I am a nanny and would like to respond to the baby nurse story.
The person who repeatedly uses the word "sucker" is incorrect.

I started my nanny job 7 months ago taking care of twins, age then 4 months. After I was hired, I was oriented to the job by "Patience" the baby nurse. She was a wonderful woman, almost 60 and very loving. Patience showed me where the bottles were, where the formula was, where the toys were, where the emergency contacts were, etc. Patience had been there for 4 months taking care of these beautiful twins 24 hours a day. One day a week she would get 24 hours off (if she wanted) and if she took it off, they would have a "relief baby nurse" sent over by the agency.

I worked with Pashience for two months, even though as my boss told me they were keeping her on at this point "only for the nights". Pashience was at that point required only to sleep in the twins nursey and tend to the babies when they woke. Prior to that, she did have them all day long too.

And since Patience had them all night long and I had them all day long, I believe the nanny story of above. The mother herself told me she wasn't good with babies and found them boring. She couldn't wait for them to be able to walk and talk.

I don't know what your baby nurse story is. But when a child is born, anyone who is going to hold him and her to their chest and sing songs too is aces in my book!

Anonymous said...

I am a nanny that uses Craigslist to find nanny jobs through the years. I am very frustrated because craigslist is FULL of nanny agencies (I would say about 80 percent of the jobs are from agencies in my city). I use craigslist to communicate directly with the family. If I wanted to use an agency I would but I choose not to. The worst agencies that post jobs about 3 times a day are A NANNY ON THE NET, AND Amai Bebe Nanny Agency I'm not saying you find bad care on craigslist, but if you are thinking about using one of these companies, you mind as well do the searching yourself because I'm starting to think they only use craigslist.

Helen said...

I have known for awhile that inferior agencies advertise on Craigs List, that is why I think something must be wonky regarding this particular job.
I have never seen the Pavillion agency advertise on CL. I thought they were more upscale.

Anonymous said...

Alot of agencies start out as trying to be upscale- and then they become unprofessional and it's all about getting their placement fee.

Just and FYI...for everyone out there....
there are almost NO professional agenices in Northern NJ....
I've heard horror stories about all of them except one.

Anonymous said...

Nanny in Baltimore: I'll tell you why "a truly experienced, well referenced " nanny would use Craigslist rather than an agency. I also have very specific criteria for the families I work for. It has been my experience that agencies send their best candidates (me) to the most difficult families. Some very wealthy and upscale families are a nightmare to work for. (See the father above who had two nannies quit after three days and one week respectively.) I look for families like the one I am with now. I answered their ad on Craigslist. They are loving, involved parents, and we work as a team. They are not wealthy, but consider paying a good salary for quality childcare a priority. Yes, I could get a higher salary through an agency, but job satisfaction is more important to me.
I work in Manhattan, where there are a lot of good families and nannies who use Craigslist. This may not be the case in Baltimore.
A nanny

Anonymous said...


I didn't say anything negative about baby nurses at all. Saying that they don't work 24 hours a day nonstop is not saying something negative.

I give them tons of props were doing the work they do, because I wouldn't be able to do it. I love and adore babies more than anything in the whole world, but I would not be able to ever get over the parents sleeping through feeds. For this reason, it is not the job for me. Unless, of course, they are both ill, which is not often the case. To me, it's mommy and daddy bootcamp and part of the territory to rise and shine every 2 hours with a newborn. I realize that is just my opinion and it is worthless and it will probably not go over well, but it's the way I truly feel nonetheless. Personally, I would NEVER hire a stranger to care for my newborn so I could get some beauty sleep. Again, if I were sick and didn't have family or friends around ot pitch in I sure would.

Hiring a nanny to watch children so the mother can get to work and pay bills is another story and not the same at all.

Back to the point. I know many, many, many friends and biz associates who have used baby nurses, and none of them have required 24 hour NONSTOP care. If the nurse did the night feeds, they'd definitely get daytime sleep.

Any idiot who would require their baby nurse to truly work both the day and night shift without any rest of break is just begging for trouble.

I think the baby nurse who said she had to work 24/7 was being a drama queen.

Anonymous said...

Having JUST hired a baby nurse, I can tell you that the agency told us that we should expect that the baby nurse will sleep when the baby sleeps- day and night and that if and when possible we should try to give the babynurse time to sit down and have her meals. I pay the fee. I know quite well that many parents are looking for 24 hour care, so who do you think these agencies are looking out for?

Nevermind that the cost of a baby nurse (who is not really a nurse) is now $2700 per week for us. And we have one child due in 2 weeks.

Anonymous said...

I have never noticed the Pavillion Agency advertising on CL before. And I am a nanny. This raises a red flag about the family!

furious sahm said...

Who uses agencies nowadays?
Perhaps busy wohms who don't have time to screen resumes. Perhaps the same people who pay a stranger to come over and teach their son to ride a bike or to potty train their daughter.
Stop outsourcing the raising of your children!

Anonymous said...

To the father who can't understand why nannies keep quitting on his wife... how funny! Have you thought of the possibility that the problem is your wife and not the nannies?
Some people make me laugh.

Anonymous said...

actually it doesn't matter if his wife was hard to get along with or not. The first nanny that didn't work out should have been able to fill in the agency in on the goods. The agency decides to keep trying to secure placements just because of the $$$. The nanny agency cares nada about the children involved. Trust me. I went on five interviews in January. I was working with a reputable agency and I was advised of the five positions, three seemed normal to me, one had both a mother and father who did not work and were in and out all day (sounded like a nightmare but the offered a great salary) and a position where the mother just got out of rehab for painkillers and might be going back in. The father would be doing the interviewing outside of the home. I interviewed with all 5 but chose the most normal of them all. Which is great, because nothing beats being around people who make their children a priority.

PS Not for any amount of money would I have taken the job with both parents at home!

Karen in NJ said...

my advice to you is to do the work yourself. because even if you don't do the work yourself, it would still be highly irresponsible of you to not verify every single work and character reference, review college transcripts, background checks and run a DMV check on the nanny. This is too important a job to trust to someone trying to make a dollar, although I have no doubt, my mil would put any candidate through the ringer.
Best of luck,

Anonymous said...

I see nothing wrong with craigslist, i advertised myself on there and have found my last 2 jobs on there, i am also with a nanny agency who has gotten me NO work at all in the almost 2 years i have been with them.

Anonymous said...


I have worked for a couple of families where one or both parents worked from home, and were in and out for client meetings throughout the day.

What would you be doing when the parents aren't home that you can't do when they are? I have never understood nannies who refuse to work with a parent home or those who contest cameras and other ways of parents keeping tabs on their children.

I work for a wonderful family! I take several pictures every day of their daughter, whenever the mood strikes me, so they can see what is going on while they are at work.

Anonymous said...

oh i don't know why I wouldnt want to work for parents who did nothing all day except live off interest. Um, I think i would be tempted to shout What the F did you have kids for you rat bastards.
But thats just me. that's how I roll. I work for phenomenally succesful parents who are a pleasure to know. I couldn't work for anyone I didn't respect!

Anonymous said...

I interviewed for a family where the mom worked from home, and did a working interview one day. I never came back! The mother was always coming in and out and the young toddler wanted her, of course and would cry every time she came into the room. It was stressful. When you are a nanny, you need to find your groove on your own.

Anonymous said...

Mothers who work from home are usually control freaks or people who can't get along with others.

Anonymous said...

12:50 AM Some jobs with parents home are difficult because the children want to go to mom, and it is a constant stressful struggle to keep them engaged in activities. You just get an elaborate art project walks through to the kitchen..they don't want to do art anymore, and so it goes, all day. It also depends on the physical set up. I had one job where the apt. was small, and you could hear the mom's voice in the office everywhere in the apt. Constant distraction. We also had to be careful not to make too much noise. What would I be doing if she wasn't there? A lot more reading, singing, dancing, and fun activities.
A nanny

jmt said...

1:37 - ROTFL!!!
Do you remember the "Addams Family Values" movie where Gomez imparts the wisdom to his brother Fester: "I cannot begin to tell you how wonderful it is to have children, then pay other people to raise them."

Nanny B said...

I happen to love working for parents who work at home. It has been this way since the beginning and 3 years later I still find it better than parents who work out of the house. Sure, you have to have the right relationship with your employers and that took some time getting into, but now, during my working hours, the kids and the parents know is who in charge and mom and dad don't overstep me at all. And the bonus, they are great parents who will stop during the day to have lunch with their children, or comfort them when they fall and need some cuddles. But they never come out and try to undo my dicipline or routine. Point is, its not wether your employers work at home or work out of the house, its the relationship you have and the type of people they are vs. who you are.

Anonymous said...

and what do you do when they come in to have lunch with their children? Shouldn't that then be their time with the children if you rule the roost at other times. Do you magically disappear?

Sounds dreadful to me. Almost as bad as working for a stay at home mom. But the agency would never place me with that.

Anonymous said...

To the earlier posters: I would never trust a nanny who prefers I never work from home. I am a Mom with a 45 minute commute and I telecommute from home 1-2 days a week. The only nanny I had who had a problem with me working from home was fired after two months because she had formed no rapport with my children. We later heard from several of our neighbors that they observed her speaking to them and treating them poorly. My weekly housekeeper also walked in on her sleeping on the couch (with my kids left unattended in the other room). When that nanny asked I not work from home, it was so I didn't cut into her naptime and because she had to pretend to engage my children properly. The woman we've had since then doesn't mind my working from home and the kids respect her and want to be with her whether I'm there or not. Plus, when I asked her if she felt it was ever an issue, my nanny says she appreciated that in the beginning I was checking on my kids because she would do the same. She said she actually likes when I work from home because it allows her to do things like sometimes leave one of the children behind with me while she shuttles the other to an activity or school. Plus, since I'm not commuting those days, she gets to leave and go home to her family earlier and gives her some flexibility to coordinate with me if she has a personal appointment to take care of it mid-day rather than use a day off. Her prior employees had to be in the office all day so if she needed to do something it was harder to coordinate--she had to take a day off and her employer had to take a day off to take care of the kids.

As to the agency vs. Craig's List issue this post is about, I found my current wonderful nanny from Craig's List. It was work--well over 100 e-mails, and about 50 phone interviews to narrow down the CL's pool to the 8 candidates we did an initial in person interview with. We use a detail application form for each applicant we interviewed. We called references on 4 of those. Out of those we narrowed it down to a choice of two candidates who we paid to baby sit with the kids for a few hours and we ran a full background check with a reputable private investigator's office (it was $250 well spent). Craig's List does have some very good candidates and like any classifieds, some that are not. You need to put the effort into finding the jewels and I would recommend doing it yourself rather than trust an agency did it properly. BTW, my prior dud of a nanny found work through agencies and she passed their screening processes as well as ours. The only way to be 100% certain that the person you hired is worthy of your trust is to check in that what you believe is going on in your home is.

Anonymous said...

I know how to the find the perfect nanny. Those 4 should be so lucky!

Anonymous said...

Regarding OP & The CL Ad-
I think you have illuminated something here. I too, was warned against using such sites as Craigs List by the agency that I used.
I think you can find a good nanny anywhere, as long as YOU are committed to doing the work that goes along with it. Don't settle for less. And don't work with any agency that doesn't disclose where they get their candidates from. That is bad business and dishonest. I understand they might have a hard time justifying how having the nanny fill out "Their" application would entitle them to 5K, but those are the breaks. Nanny agencies will be a thing of the past. I would love to find a nanny headhunter and pluck the good nannies away from the bad employers. As in those that have a problem providing lunch for their nanny. Gruesome!
To the mother who's nanny asked that she not work from home-
Red light. Who is the boss anyway? I hired my last nanny a year ago and she is pretty good. She knew when she came to work for us that I worked from home on Fridays. As such, because my children are young- we play it by here. If the children are needy and focused on me on Friday, I am not going to torture the children by sitting 7 feet from them and declaring myself unavailable. I usually end up spending the bulk of the day with the children and sending the nanny home early. Working from home is something that you have to be careful about. You cannot allow your comfort to outweigh your children's. It is very hard for a 2 year old to understand why mommy can't be bothered and for that reason, I prefer working at my office. I understand that my children (2 & 3) are going to want me and I can imagine that makes the nanny feel useless and incapable (of doing her job). When they get older, working from home could actually be a good thing. I could still take them to school and pick them up, etc. But for now, it just causes a lot of confusion for everyone.

(I have an office share and don't have access to my city office on Friday).

Nanny B said...

10:11-what do I do when mom or dad comes out of their office to have lunch with the kids? easy, I make lunch for myself and we all have lunch together. Its called team work. Mom wants to go for a ride with the kids, we all go together, dad wants to play ball with one of them, I play with the other. See, its nice whether its mom or dad time, its family time, and believe it or not, I'm considered one of the family. thats the type of relationship we have.

Anonymous said...

No offense Nanny B, but if I came home specifically to have lunch with my children, I don't think I would want or need the nanny. I value the time I have with my children.

Anonymous said...

I commented at 11:48 and I had suggested who to use to find a nanny and my comment was not printed in it's entiry.

Meg said...

Sounds like Spam to me, 2:33.

jj said...

Last thing I would want to read is a crock of agency spam.

Anonymous said...

lol, the first comment
"maybe you're not"
in reference to
"I think I am a good employer"


Anonymous said...

I agree with Nanny B. My nanny is a member of the family and I often ask her if she'd like me to make lunch or order in food for all of us if I'm working from home. If I wanted some private time with the kids that would require a discussion with her on plans before I just "dismiss" her like she is a servant. She often has activities laid out that she's discussed and set up with the kids and their friends and I would not presume to rework that anymore than I would expect her to presume to come into my office and rework what I'm doing for my employer.

Nanny B said...

5:38-thank you for understanding how to treat a nanny in this situation. 2:20-you may come home to have lunch with your children, but not before discussing it with your nanny I'm sure to either make sure they are going to be there or so it won't mess up the schedule. In my situation, mom works at home and works hard so for her to come out of her office long enough to have lunch doesn't mean i'm done working, I still have to make sure lunch is ready for the kids, make sure everything is cleaned up, and then in our case, nap time is right after lunch and yes, sometimes mom has time to help clean up and help put the kids down, but on most days, she has a conference call or a meeting she is running to, so I can't just leave. I do however take that time to switch laundry around or start dinner so that I'm not having to do it later or during a time when i should be focused on the kids. I'm not saying that it demeans moms who take the extra time and effort to come home from an office to have lunch, I'm just explaining how my situation works. And for nannies who refuse to work for parents who work at home, that is their choice, but its yours whether or not to hire them.

Anonymous said...

I have a GREAT nanny that I found on Craigs List. If I could afford a $10,000 for a nanny I wouldn't work and take care of my son. Unfortunatley my nanny is having a baby and will stop working and now I am looking for a new nanny on criag's list. And by the way, I am not an uneducated person, I am a lawyer and my son is the most important thing to me in the world, and while I may hire a young person without much nanny experience I will do a background check and reference check. I think if you are careful craig's list is fine.

Anonymous said...

Dear poor baby..okay so you figured it out..what is the deal? Is it that you are unable to make a decision for yourself? People like you really do need nannies..if at the very least so that your children will grow up a lot more self assurred than you obviously are!!"mothers & fathers I beg of you"???? Please. get your but off the blog sights and start looking for a nanny instead of someone else to do it for you!

Anonymous said...

8:22, whats wrong with asking for advice from people who have "been there"? Nothing, thats what. Thats why there are so many forums out there. Its all about people sharing experiences. geez.

laura said...

I was a DC area nanny in the late 90s. Three GREAT jobs, still keep in touch with the moms.

All word of mouth. It is the way to go. (Still background check and motor vehicle check and I would drug test, too.)I got my first gig because their former nanny asked all her nanny friends if they knew anyone who wanted to be a nanny...