Received Tuesday, December 19, 2006
I recently hired a baby nurse through Absolute Best Care agency to help me care for my newborn baby for three weeks. I was assigned to a Jamaican woman named Monica (last name available). When she arrived on the day we came home from the hospital, everything seemed fine. After the first week I started to question whether she was as experienced as her resume indicated... By the end of the second week, I began to question whether she really fit the description given to me by the agency...Midway through the third week I became suspicious that she was actually not Monica (-) at all...Finally, I confronted her and she broke down crying with regret for what she had done... I asked to see her identification - and she was a completely different woman. The real Monica (-) had sent this woman in her place as "a favor for a friend in need of the money" (and charged the gal a small fee for the favor). While the woman caring for our son was pleasant and loving, she had never actually worked as a baby nurse before (she had no green card or authorization to work in the U.S. / her passport indicated that her occupation was a "dressmaker"). We were horrified - an imposter had been in our home for eighteen days impersonating a baby nurse sent to us by a reputable agency. We sent her home immediately and paid her a portion of what we owed her in cash. We are grateful that nothing happened to our child, however, we hope that the real Monica (-) is never placed by an agency again. While Absolute Best Care waved our placement fee, they never refunded us the cash.
155 comments:
I am terribly sorry, but if you allow a stranger to come into your home and even go near your NEWBORN child....... without verifying some kind of photo identification... jeez, any lady could have walked onto your doorstep claiming to be this "Monica" lady and easily either stolen your baby or worse... Oh wait a minute, i guess "any" lady claiming to be Monica did!!!!!
... I'm sorry but there's either got to be more to this story that you're not telling us, or you are just plain not playing with a full deck of cards. Again, i am sorry because i hate being so harsh on people.. but this post really upset me because it could have been so easily avoided if common sense was in there somewhere... a NEWBORN baby?!?!?!?!? Jeez.
I am glad that your baby is ok.
If you hired someone from a reputable agency and they showed up at your door the time/day they are supposed to and introduce themselves as the name of the person you hired, you probably wouldnt' ask for their ID!
The original poster is a normal, caring mom who had a horrible thing happen to her (which we all agree could have been way worse). But honestly, this is a warning, take it as that, and leave the harsh judgements out. It would be important to know what city the agency is out of (NYC?) so that no one uses them.
I really think that you need to contact the authorities and the media about this. The agency needs to take more responsibility.
what a bitchy response from the first person. when a baby nurse comes to take care of your child, why would you ever ask for Id? It isn't like you need to make a copy of her Drivers liscence for insurance.
What a crappy thing to happen to someone.
Don't forget people, baby nurses aren't allowed to call themselves baby nurses anymore unless they are REAL nurses. They got away with that crap for way too long!
When you ask for a baby nurse to come and the agency says they have someone named "Monica" coming in, you wouldn't be suspicious if a woman at the door says she's "Monica". The first thing that comes to your mind is, so...the baby nurse they sent me has come! Not, is she an imposter? The first poster is unnecessarily harsh and lacks empathy and perspective.
I hope the real Monica will never find work in this profession again. If my husband, a doctor, allowed someone else to pretend to be him and treat his patients, he would be locked up in jail.
Just goes to show, you can never be too sure about anyone who says they are a nanny.
Agencies are not 100% reliable.
Even though you pay a large placement fee to a nanny placment agency, when it comes down to it, verifing references is the responsibility of the parents.
And yes, I would ask to see a driver's license, as well as any other certificates- i.e. CPR/1st Aid.
Even though an agency says they have checked references-
you, as a parent, should call each and every one of them as well.
Double check everything the agency is telling you is true.
I have heard too many horror stories- nannies saying they have driver's lic. and do not....
agencies saying the nanny does not smoke, and she does....etc. etc....
You can never be too safe when it comes to the safety of your children's care.
Remember most agencies are just looking for their placement fee-
not surprised to hear you did not get all your money back.
Look at the Coldwater Canyon post below! The person in question is named MONICA. And would have been starting a job around the timeframe this mother got her from the agency. And it said she had a nursing degree! Where did this post occur? Same area? Or should we all stop employing "Monicas"?
Also, the Agency should fire the real Monica! I hope they have. And couldn't the fake Monica be arrested?
And why in god's name would the parents pay the imposter ANYTHING?!! In cash no less! This was fraud, and dangerous at that. Tell her you are calling the cops and get her the hell out! Then call the Better Business Bureau on the Agency. They may have to start doing spot checks on their placements to make sure it is still the same nurse they sent out.
Nobody would touch my child without ID. Why is that so hard?
sorry but I have to agree that she should have asked for identification. As a preschool teacher, whenever anyone visits the classroom and especially is authorized to pick up a child, you always check the I.D.
to the stupid people who posted above saying no one touches their child without id, i wish i could reach out and slap you! I have used babysitting services and nanny agencies at upscale resorts, it never crosses my mind to demand ID when someone shows up at my door! for you to even suggest that the parent is at fault here is ludicrous. let the fault lie where it should with the criminal conduct of the "baby nurse". Both the real monica and not the fake!
to 2:25:
So you take no responsibility for who cares for your child, then? Just leave it up to other bureaucratic, for-profit agencies? Hope for the best and kiss it up to God?
Adults take the best care they can, then if someone manages to con us we use the police agencies available to punish the criminals. Monica and the fake Monica should both be arrested for fraud and endangerment of the infant. And I suspect the fake Monica is illegal, so she would be deported. Anyone who you do not know who shows up at your door to care for your child should show you their ID. If Agencies know this will happen every time, and their placements know this will happen, then perhaps they won't be so ready to take money from illegals as a fee and perpetrate fraud.
The agency that hired Monica probably vetted her out, but obviously it doesn't mean anything when their nanny is crooked, greedy and immoral and she sent someone else in her place. THAT's why you ask for ID.
How scary. I think the agency is not taking enough of the blame. I can't believe they took money from you after what happened. I would tell them that you will go to the police & media with this story unless they refund you the money you payed to them & the fake Monica.
I'm glad to hear your baby is ok.
in upscale neighborhoods, no one is iding the baby nurse that comes through the door. I mean before I heard of this story, who knew? Get off your impractical high horse.
Above poster-
you mean to say- you'd just let anyone into your home without checking their ID???
Many nanny placement agencies don't even met the nannies they send out before hand.
And many lie about the nannies qualifications.
The parents are the employers- it's up to them to interview and do a background check on their "employee".
Parents, please take the time to research and learn how to properly screen and interview a nanny to be certain she is qualifed. Always double check the info. the agency gives you- and ask to see origionals of any green cards, driver's lic. or certifications.
I would hope, at bear minimum, the parents would have a copy of the nannies driver's license on hand in case anything went wrong.
If the nanny is on the up and up- she will have no problem showing you her creditionals.
a baby nurse isn't the same thing. She arrives at your house to stay. She is basically your prisoner for the duration of her stay, so why would you ask for ID. Idiot, of course you would just assume that she is the person that the agency told you all about. I hate you. I hate you and your stupid asshole assumptions. We are parents. We aren't supposed to have to defend our children and homes and every front. Something needs to be safe. You think like a criminal, so I am guessing you are some bone thug. Rot in hell.
You are a parent? God help your child if you communicate on that level.
Um, why are you not suing the agency! Is this gross negligence and they should refund your money, plus give you some more money for having to endure this!
Good luck!
To the poster who wrote
"to the stupid people who posted above saying no one touches their child without id, i wish i could reach out and slap you! I have used babysitting services and nanny agencies at upscale resorts, it never crosses my mind to demand ID when someone shows up at my door! for you to even suggest that the parent is at fault here is ludicrous. let the fault lie where it should with the criminal conduct of the "baby nurse". Both the real monica and not the fake!"
I don't think anyone is suggesting that the agency or the baby nurse is not at fault. What they are suggesting is that parents do indeed have the responsibility to make sure they know who is taking care of their child and to not assume anything when it comes to their child.
Are you the same poster who made the comment about "upscale resorts" etc? If so, do you realize how you sound? You not only sound like a horrible parent, you sound like a horrible person who because she is well-off doesn't feel that she needs to take responsibility for anything, even the children who should be the most precious thing to you.
I feel so bad for your kids. Not to be mean, but I really do...
Communicate on what level?
WHO are you talking to?
I am a nanny and i have been hired by parents who never taught about asking for my ID. Which is weird, why would you trust your baby or kids with someone, that you don,t know about.My current employer asked me for ID about a week after they hired me, even though i had spent a week in thier home without them being around, with just me and the baby, anything could of happen, I asked them why they took a week they said they were so busy they forgot to asked, so i gave them my ID, plus my mailing address and home phone number. So parents when you hire someone please ask for ID, mailing adress, contact numbers, reference etc.Do your own home work instead of depending on other people, like the agency to do it for you.
LISTEN UP, IDIOTS. A BABY NURSE IS NOT THE SAME AS A NANNY. WHEN YOU HIRE A NANNY THROUGH AND AGENCY YOU SEE ALL OF HER PAPERWORK AND BACKGROUND AND IF YOU ARE ANY KIND OF PERSON, YOU REQUIRE THAT YOUR NANNY HAS TO HAVE CPR AND FIRST AID AND HAS TO DRIVE SO YOU WOULD HAVE A COPY OF HER DL. A BABY NURSE SENT FOR THREE WEEKS UNFORTUNATELY IS MORE LIKE CALLING UP A SITTER SERVICE. FOR THE AMOUNT OF MONEY YOU GET GOUGED (BECAUSE SHE IS NO KIND OF REAL NURSE) YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO THINK GOING THROUGH A REPUTABLE AGENCY MEANS THE PERSON YOU HAVE SPOKEN TO ON THE PHONE AND THE PERSON WHOSE PAPERWORK YOU HAVE SEEN IS GOING TO BE THE PERSON WHO SHOWS UP.
I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOU NANNIES COMING ON THIS BOARD AND FINDING A WAY TO TURN EVERYTHING AROUND. WHETHER DEFENDING SOME PUNK NANNY OR SOMEHOW BLAMING THE PARENT FOR THE PROBLEM.
THE RESPONSE OF NANNIES ON THIS BOARD MAKES ME CERTAIN THAT THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL, I WILL EVER EMPLOY SUCH A PIGHEADED PIECE OF SHIT IN MY EMPLOYMENT. NO OFFENSE.
When i go for a job interview I will show my id even if a parent doesnt ask for it. Reason below.
I responded to a post to someone who was looking for a nanny, I called and she asked for my references, so I gave them. she told me she will check and call me back in a few days. a few days later one of my references called me asking about my NEW job, I was what new job. she said someone called and was gonna hire me and was checking my reference. anyway, she gave me the ladys number and she said she hired me, so I asked her what she looked like knowing it wasnt me. anyway, I told her the person is a phoney. anyway, when the phoney came to work, she asked her if she had id because her husband asked her too ask her for it. she said no, but she said she can go home and get it, so she left and never came back...so now when I call about a job, I refuse to give my references unless I meet the parent first.
Well here is my 2 cents.
The agency did their job. thats it after they place the person they don't do anything unless it dosen't work out then they will sent a replacement or give refund ( but I would say that is less likely)
I monica person is the one in the wrong and so was the imposer. People will do anything when they are hirting for money.
For all the parents. Now you know that you should check ID's. make she you call refances and ask agency to profide you with picture of the person you are hiring this way you know what they look like.
Hey 9:55 you sound like a real class act!
Give me f'n break poster 955...You are so lame!! A baby nurse provides care for newborns,same as ananny and while technically you may be correct..they do the same thing with a difference of logistics!! The parent in this case WAS absolutley to blame!! Being a parent is a big job..that includes knowing who you let in your home and who you let touch your child! Any parent that allows a stranger in their home with a child/infant with out checking to make sure that they are who they sat they are is an imbecile!!
THEY WERE COMPLETLEY AT FAULT! SUCK IT UP AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY!!!!!I would be embarassed to tell their story..not to mention the questioning I would get from family & freinds about not checking things out for myself!! Babies are precious gifts..the OP needs to start treating hers like one! And as for you not hiring a nanny..wow big loss for them!!
To poster 225..are you kidding me with this!!! YOU NEED TO LEARN WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A PARENT! IT MEANS being responsible. I have friends that I childcare swap with and I trust them but you had better believe that I have their address,phone # and license plate # all written down because if my child ever came up missing I would not want to look like a dumb ass as the OP does right now!! How could you let someone so close to your baby like that with out varifying the info that an agency gave you!! So stupid!! If I were a slaesman in your area I'd be stinkin' rich "well gee..if they said it..it MUST be true..no need ta check" DUMBASS!!!!!!
Anyone who agrees w/the original poster NOT being at fault..should have their children taken away!! Stupid lazy parents!! Let's pay someone else to take care of the kid!! Doesn't matter who..we'll let someone else choose just as long as they send them by 8 so we can get back to what we want to do!!!!It'll probably be fine!!
This problem has to do with greedy-money hungry nannies, babynurses and nanny agencies. Not parents who trust that by calling a reputable agency, everything would be handled just fine. After reading this, of course now I think I would think to verify the sitter who shows up is the same on I hired by phone. I wouldn't have known this before. Nor would I pretend to. And again, above poster is right- the nannies swarm on every post and attack the parents. It is sickening! These are the very same parents that keep you ensconced in gap clothing and fake logo bags.
Wait a minute..how is it that the AGENCY is at fault???????? I am a baby nurse. I go to the most reputable agency in town. I am trustlined, have CPR &1st aid training and a long list of wonderful references dating back 6-8 yrs and all credentials. I am an A#1 baby nurse. The agency finds a job..I am to start in a week. I decide to let my sister go in my place as she is down & out and badly in need of a job.
This has NOTHING to do w/the agency.Even if they were to call and varify that I am doing my job..the parent could go on and on about me and yet the conversation is actually about 2 different people!!
Does it still seem to you that the agency is at fault??
HEll NO!! It seems to me that mom and dad need to get their heads out of their asses and check refrences & ID"S!!
The agency did everything right..mom & dad did everything wrong!!
Signed..a nanny pissed at lazy parents who don't do their job and the idiots that praise them!!!!!!
Poster 11:35 You are probably the dumbass that let someone in your house with out checking to make sure that they really were who they said they were!!! Blame everyone else!!!!! Lazy ass..do your job!!
Right. Because the parents are always at fault. Let me guess- when a police office approaches you, you ask for his ID and then take the time to call in the badge # to verify it isn't phony. You suck. The problem isn't with the parents it is with the derelicts and criminals posing as childcare providers. And guess what- go ahead and check the ID. Have you seen some greencard photos? It could be anyone. Not too mention that it could have been a fake person from the get go and because she isn't from this country you wouldn't be able to run a criminal background check. So the moral of this story is that there must be a long around the block of nannies ready to committ fraud, rob, sleep with your husbands and steal your children and behind them will be a bevy of fat ass nannies with picket signings crying out "don't blame the nanny. Blame the parent".
Put down the pork rinds. Step away from the Haagen Daz. Take a run and clear your bloated, ignorant heads.
to 1135 I think the problem has to do with the selfish ,lazy ass parents..want to have a baby..take care of it then and stop blaming everyone else just because you are to ignorant to protect your child!!!!!!
I think it is one angry nanny that is posting all of this BS rhetoric. It is not possible that there could exist multiples of people possessing this little aptitude and intelligence.
How many of you frisk the maytag man when he shows up at your house? What about the meter reader? The postman? Yeah, sure they may wear suits but????
Home Invasions are big these days. Families are targets across the board. This just makes it sad and scary. It doesn't mean that this mother was at all to blame. Nor is anyone who has this kind of fraud pereptrated on them.
Shame on you and your evil, evil words.
You are right I don't frisk the man coming into my house to look at my appliances..just my kids idiot!!!
Oh right. This must be the fault of a WOHM. Of course. Why didn't I see this coming. All women who want to have children better stay home and raise them from age 1 day to age 18.
Really, women need not waste their time with such stupid things as medical school, universities or law school. They should not dally in the arts or dream of effecting social change with the work they do in the justice system.
No they are not allowed to do anything but have children. And if they choose to work, then they are not allowed to have children.
And just writing this shaved ten points off my IQ. I can't believe I allowed one idiot to rile me up!
Maybe your built like an oxe, ugly as a bore and living below the poverty level with your mangy little raggedy kids. In other words, people run from you bitch. If you don't have business people want to get up in, you are in no danger. Be damn sure any repairman that shows up at your place stays only as long as he can hold his breath (from the stank) and his only thought is "Hell, am I gonna get paid".
You have no idea how the other half lives. You are angry, shallow and resentful of everyone that has more than you.
Ho Ho HO
Bitch,
Did I mention how much I abhor STUPID people?
Women should not stay home but they should be completly responsible when hiring someone to do their job while out of the house!! IE know who you are letting in!!!!!
I'm posting to you. You know- who you are with your little repairman scenario. Arguing that
you don't frisk the man coming into my house to look at my appliances.
Seriously, do you own an appliance?
I picture you and the lil ones hanging out in front of an open gas stove trying to keep cool in the hood. Visions of bitter rage dancing above your ratty, lice infested head.
hh..I see you are a bit defensive..could it be that YOU are the dumbass letting people in you house????????/ It's ok honey now you know for the next time!!!
Hey..when you talk..don't use your mouth!!!!!!!!!!
Why would this be a woman's responsibility as opposed to a man's? Or a shared responsibility. I make close to 400k a year and my husband barely clears 80. He has less work obligation and more time on hand.
Come on kids..you are boring me //nothing more clever than bitch???
NP- what I am getting from this is the poster who seems so angry is really upset that she could never afford a baby nurse.
Your stripes are showing. And they aren't pretty.
Tisk tisk. Why are you being so harsh and judgmental? Why can't you just take the post in the spirit it was intended. It served as a warning to many who I am sure never even conceived of such a possibility.
It was in many ways a public service.
The poster doesn't deserve your hateful slander.
OKay well I am sorry your husband is the dumbass that dropped the ball and ket a stranger in you house!!!!And the way you are so loyal to him..giving it all up online like that shows us how you made it up the ladder to your high powered job...little cold heartedness gets you far!!!!!!!!
Wow that is one jealous freak posting on here. You shouldn't have mentioned that you make 400K. I bet she is just pissing herself now!
DAMN, MONICA
STOP POSTING ALREADY!
To the women that just dissed her hubby?? Does he get pissed when you say things like that?
"Dissed" her "hubby"? You are sooo street.
I think she was just countering your point by stating the nec. facts.
Np here..a bunch of nonesense. People should never let someone in the house without knowing who they are..ID is a must .Haven't you ever seen "UNCLE BUCK"?...
I'm still waiting for something clever..so far it's just a lot of name calling and uneducated gibberish..give me something worth responding too...
No. You aren't a new poster.
Same, uneducated pig as before.
I would never speak of my husband that way"he only brings down 80K".."but I make the $$$$"
Poor guy!!!
tisk tisk..poor thing can't even come up with a little witty banter just the same old name calling on every other blog!! It's okay...maybe someday you'll smarten up and check your baby nusres ID AND come up with something clever to say!!!
of course you wouldn't.
By the tone of your posts, it is ever so clear you probably don't buy toilet tissue without:
a) requisitioning money
b) consulting husband on ply and brand
c) supplying husband receipt and change from purchase.
Angry, poor mother:
Please quit posting!
My husband is fabulous!! Yes I tell him all and unlike ms. hig-n-mighty I would never belittle him...does not matter who makes all the dough...you are still both dumbasses for letting freaky baby nurse in with out knowing who the hell she really was!! You are just pissed because more than one poster has now told you this!! Remember..poor angry mommy NEVER let a stranger in her house to play with baby & daddy!! So take that to the bank you dumbf!@K
come on now hh you can type faster than that ..don't keep me waiting!!!!!!!!!
I am not the original poster.
I am someone who used a baby nurse after the birth of both of my children. The first for one month, the second for six weeks. I never thought to ask for ID from the baby nurse. I had all of her certificates and resume and references. They were glowing. She showed up and she was wonderful. I am guessing she was the actual person on the resume. My point is that I would never have thought to ask for ID. Since you speak to the person on the phone and give them directions or send a car service for them; why would you think the person who arrived at 1:30 on a Sunday afternoon was anyone else than who you invited?
I agree that times are changing and we should all be more careful. I do not agree that the person who posted this was dumb or negligent in anyway! She made a very valid point for all of us (at her expense) and I thank her for that!
Your husband is hardly perfect.
He earns all the money and he is selfish in bed.
“I would rather die standing than live on my knees!”
'night
80 k probably sounds like a windfall to you!
lol!
Lauren..because babies show up on AMBER ALERT all the time..that is why you would ask for I.D.
Hell yeah, I wouldn't want to live on my knees serving and subordinate to some man.
I have power.
AND IT FEELS GOOOOOOOOOOOOD!
okay..still waiting for clever...and again..say what you want but I am not the dumbass letting freaks who lie about who they are hold my baby..or my husband for that matter!!!
Actually they don't show up on Amber Alert all the time. There hasn't been an amber alert all week. Isn't the one on this page for the whole NATION?
Cause your a dyke!!!!!!!!
On her knees.
lol.
hh..you just need to get laid then maybe you'd find something clever to say!!!!!!!
night night simpletons..remember lv that door open so any stranger that wants to can walk in!!!!!
Yes. what a brilliant analogy.
Any woman who achieves success and power must be a dyke.
You are such an uneducated, ignorant and ridiculous fool.
PS Hilary Clinton 2008.
hh..you really are slow typing!!! Jeesh
Thank you to OP for sharing this story. I guess we should ask for ID upfront. I have never before. Thanks to you, now I know!
Okay if I keep waiting for responses I'll fall asleep..dim witted and slow....bye forever
GO TO BED. because damn sure your ass needs to be up early busting out some grits and serving pork sausage in bed to your husband atop your sears Roebuck Bedspread.
Fuuny Thread ladies
Perhaps I am naive in assuming the above posters are all women so bear with me. Is this really what we as women have come to? In reading these posts, the complete lack of regard for the topic and the pervasive use of name calling and profanity renders your posts childish and simple minded. No wonder in this day and age people still refuse to believe a woman is capable of running this country. After reading these posts, I too am beginning to fear the day a woman may be sitting in the Oval office. This is how we treat each other? This is how we respond to other women's opinions? "Bitch" Dumbass"? How sad that this long after Junior High, women still attempt to uplift themselves by tearing someone else down.
SO, DO YOU PEOPLE KNOW WHO YOU REMIND ME OF? THE PEOPLE WHO WERE FIGHTING OVER TEENY BEANIE BABIES AT MC DONALDS!!! UH HUH, BIATCHES!
This sight is grossly misused. Parents versus nannies. Adults namecalling (like I just did). Holy crap! No wonder kids are messed up today! Can't ever win. I myself do check ID's from people I don't know.
SO TAKE NOTE: YOU'VE BEEN FORWARDED OF WHAT COULD HAPPEN IF YOU DON'T CHECK ID'S. AND SO NANNIES DON'T JUMP DOWN MY THROAT, GO AHEAD. DO YOUR OWN INVESTIGATING ABOUT POTENTIAL EMPLOYERS.
!!!!!!!!STOP ACTING 12!!!!!!!!!!!!
One thing that mothers should also keep in mind is to TRUST your instincts. The mom knew something was up in the first week, she should have been more assertive. Thank GOD nothing happened to the baby. The agency NEEDS to be held responsible and sued, then they can turn around and place blame on the real "Monica". She should never be allowed to work again because she put so many lives in jeopardy, including the young woman she duped into posing as a nurse.
Thank you to the person who submitted the original story. It will serve as a warning and reminder for many.
As for those submitting comments, as much as possible we do try to avoid editing the comments we receive. We do true to allow for a free exchange of ideas and opinions. The name calling seems just a bit out of place, please strive to avoid such in the future.
(And posting in capital letters).
Happy Holidays,
Jane
I cannot beleive you people." The woman she duped into posing as a nurse" No one wants to take responsibility for anything anymore! The lady posing as a nurse is a grown up...she knew what she was doing..come-on people...start thinking for yourselves and expect people to take responsibility for their actions..the fake nurse for posing as someone else and mom & dad for being irresposible and not checking ID!!!It is no wonder socities children are the wat they are..everyone wants to shurk responsibility!!!!
It's sad to hear all of this. It's whole heartedly the parent'a fault, because she didn't check any ID. I'm sure that the "imposter" would have caused or didn't cause any harm to the infant.
I want someone to answer me this; since when does someone need a certicficate to know how to take care of babies and children. The people who employ babynurses and nannies have to understand it's a communal effort to raise children. It shouldn't be left up to the nanny or the babynurses alone to raise your children, they're human to. The reality of it is this woman wanted someone to come to her home and take complete control of her newborn's first couple of weeks of life. Do not leave it up to the nanny alone, and some things that are happening can surely be prevented.
And since when does having a green card denotes the quality of work. I know plenty of people without greencards that take better care of children than people without greencards. And if these nannies that are without greencards are deported, exactly who would be taking care of your precious? Certainly not African Americans. They are done with being house slaves, because when you think about this whole thing, it's just modern day slavery.
you are so redundant in your posts.
I just read through this thread and you are the same person who posted this sentiment 50 times or more. And by the way it is shirk- not shurk.
It is completely uncommon to demand ids from babynurses who show up. Well it was, hopefully this post changes that!
And for all of you who hire baby nurses, please take the time to comprehend the skills the baby nurse actually has. They are in most instances less educated than a nursing assistant. They have a certification for a baby nurse class that costs $50. And they are not allowed to call themselves baby nurses. For the money that some of the agencies were asking, I decided to hire an LPN from a Connecticut Hospital to work nights for us during the first 8 weeks. She was worth every penny.
well,I may seem redundant but I have never let a stranger in my home without seeing ID! I also took care of both my children without the help of an outsider!Don't quite understand women allowing a baby nurse to feed their kids at night...what an absolute fantastic experience to miss out on!
It is nice that you are educated enough to correct someone's grammar but a shame you ae unable to tend to your own child at night!Paying someone whils you go to work is understandable paying a "baby nurse" to do your job is very sad .
I think someone called you on that way back. You just reek of hate and animosity towards anyone who could dare afford such a luxury as a baby nurse. Isn't that the reason for your 83 angry posts on this very thread?
Lovely. Someone so removed from the circle of those who employ baby nurses and yet she is attacking a woman for not demanding ID. As if that is how it is done.
A baby nurse is a luxury. Deal with it.
You are absolutley right..a baby nurse is a luxury..I am shocked that any mommy would consider letting someone else(an admitted perfect stranger and fraud infact in said particular case) bond with her child a luxury!Children are a gift and the fact that you would give that time to someone else is appalling to me. It has nothing to do with money..you obviously have no idea what you are missing when that little 2 week old face stares at you while eating at 1 am!!! You are the kind of parent who really could care less that you are missing out on those things though because after all you need to get a full nights sleep so you will be ready for your $80.00 manicure and $120.00 haircut tomorrow. You choose to be a part time, when it is convenient for YOU parent..don't rag on those of us that choose to be there all the time!Again ,I am not talking about employing a nanny while working!
Well sooo sorry guess us po' folk is just so leary that we is always askin'for id's!!!Guess you oh so wealthy people, as you make it sound no more an we do..but lets member who's lettin who in houses with babes!
but your tin trailer is probably the kind of place you have to be oh so careful around. cousin johny out back with his 22 aimed at anyone coming up on the hind end. Baby nurses from upscale agencies sent to affluent homes, the protocol was never to card them at the door. This post makes me think perhaps it should be. It never does surprise me how tricky people will be for the dollar. And how angry the people lacking the dollar are at those who have the dollar. Almighty dollar.
I am from Ca. I have a fairly large circle of friends..we often get together with our friends and friends of our friends..we see a lot..I am not sure where all the above poster are from but let me tell you..we live in a fairly affluent area..we spank our children..employ nannies and would never allow an agency to send someone into our home without asking that a photo ID accompany the paperwok from the agency.
A baby nusre or doula would have been very affordable for us..this is not a jealousy issue...
So,we here in Ca. want to know where is it,what state do people have such low standards and so much money that they would not ask for a photo ID from either the agency or employee herself? Please do tell.
An $80 manicure? That is too much. My nails are real. And a $120 haircut. That is soooo South Jersey & Budget. Think closer to $210.
The above post just goes to show that money does not equal education!!!
Of course the baby nurse showed ID. Just like a 19 year old who uses her cousins ID to buy alcohol. The baby nurse was a scam artist a fraud. Why are you trying to put this on the parent?
You are the same person in all of these posts. You don't have money. You arne't affluent. You wouldn't know a doula if she took a crap on your head. You are just horribly angry and bitter.
You likely don't have any circle of friends. That is why you post back on her every three minutes.
Oh and also, I would like to know where in the world I would chance upon and educated and upscale person who spanked their child? That is sooooooooo horrfically low brown and unevolved.
"we" here in CA?
You are kidding, right?
I mean I'm not laughing but you must be kidding!
“Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
---- MLK
I understand why these posts took such an ughy turn. Your ignorance is bothersome, even to me. And I am drinking decaf today!
Once a snob ALWAYS a snob. You poor thing! Your have based your entire argument on money. Shallow and sad.You are right I can't win here because the money thing just does nothing for me!!My children have a fulltime mommy..not because we can't afford a nanny or doula but because I am a mommy and not whatever it is you are! Enjoy your baby nurses,nannies,doula's ,housekeeper and everything else that money can buy you! I will continue to enjoy my 2 am feedings!! My heart goes out to your children.This is my last post..so you can continue to trash me all you want and try to make this about money which is obviously all you can realte too! Bye!
Poster 107..what's with the constant potty mouth?
Affluent people do spank children much to your dismay. It is not only a poverty level discipline!
oh mercy me!
if by affluent, you mean some boob who hit the numbers (lotto) then yeah-sure they still spank their kids.
With true affluence, old money comes an education. And educated people do not resort to physical discipline. (Unless they are sadistic monsters).
The parents WERE in the wrong.Ultimatley they should have known who they were hiring. End of story.
Okay......127
When a man dressed up in a UPS outfit shows up at your door and knocks holding a package and you open the door to sign the package, but he pushes you aside and ties you up and robs you. You are not in the wrong. The criminal is.
It is sad that people have to be on guard every minute of their life. Failing to suspect everyone of being a criminal doesn't make you wrong. It makes you human.
In response to the nutjob that posted at 1:27. Speak for yourself..I live in Tribeca in a glorious home ,drive a BMW,employ a nanny,a housemaid and have more money than you & God put together and I spank my children.Just as some of our freinds do. Stop trying to make your case by adopting those of us that are wealthy!If you can't do it on your own don't do it at all!BTW,You would never make it in a truly wealthy circle of people you just don't posess the vocabulary or money so stop selling yourself as something you aren't.PLEASE
_JP
I would no sooner boast about spanking my child than I would my wealth or status.
Oh vey!
Of course you wouldn't baost of your wealth or social status... you have none.You have to remain in the in PC crowd and keep up with the Jones's. When you live where I do and have as much money as I do..you stop caring what others think and start doing what is right for you not the rest of the world!That is why my friend you are stuck.. the poor and lower middle class can do what they please and do. The very wealthy..old money as you say..can do what they want..and do..but you..the young yuppies who want to be wealthy but are not..the PC crowds that drive your SUV'S and have a mortgage that is JUST affordable and CC's that will NEVER be paid off..you do not have the same freedoms that the latter two groups do because you put yourselves on a pedestal above everyone else and then spend all of your time worrying that others will find out you are not what you appear to be.
Boast of your social status..really.
who keeps comparing the delivery men to the baby nurse??!!!
a day later and you are still posting and boasting. I think you are schitzo. Tribeca is a long way from California, honey.
post 218 are the person who keeps comparing the delivery men to baby nurses?
To the poster who wants to dominate this blog and feels that I am indeed not who I am..I live close to Hudson Street and spend time at Washington Market Park with my children weekly. You are very mis-informed if you feel I am someone else!You are also starting to show your true colors.
Now where do you live?!Where is that affluent area you have led us all to beleive you are from?
We have lost sight of the OP here. It is that we should all check references and ID's and NOT rely on others to do so for us!
I was just reading all of the posts here, but had to skip over some. people are so nasty here, and I feel bad for your kids!
to the woman who wrote:
"In response to the nutjob that posted at 1:27. Speak for yourself..I live in Tribeca in a glorious home ,drive a BMW,employ a nanny,a housemaid and have more money than you & God put together and I spank my children.Just as some of our freinds do. Stop trying to make your case by adopting those of us that are wealthy!If you can't do it on your own don't do it at all!BTW,You would never make it in a truly wealthy circle of people you just don't posess the vocabulary or money so stop selling yourself as something you aren't.PLEASE
_JP"
wow. how embarrassing to be you!
As someone who is a childcare provider and husband is a blue-collar worker, (we don't make much more than 50K a year combined) I'm glad we live a simple life, and even more glad after reading your post! If being rich makes you that much of a monster, I'm glad we drive a used hyundai, shop at target and live in a two bedroom house.
gosh. it really makes you wonder about what this person's childhood was like...
Affluent people know how to spell believe and usually put at least one, if not two spaces between the end of one sentence and the beginning of the next.
Affluent people know how to spell believe and usually put at least one, if not two spaces between the end of one sentence and the beginning of the next.
Thanks for your comments. As the OP, I hope some moms out there learned from my mistake. Ask to see your baby nurse's ID even if you hired through a reputable agency. BTW, I am a mother of four who needed a little extra help...not sleep, since I'm nursing exclusively. A baby nurse is a unique situation - but now we all know that they should be treated like any other child care provider...with caution.
Grammatical errors aside..you have once again avoided the issue as well as the question aimed directly at you. I just got back from an afternoon of shopping and this blog brought a smile to my face. I would like to thank the Tribeca person for setting everything straight..since you have the money & I don't..maybe the dominating blogger as you call him/her will see you as a valid oponent in this debate,although as I see above he/she has taken the cowardly way out..just like a politician..avoid the answer to the question and find the weekness! Not surprised..afterall these are the people letting others raise their children. Since I am not "of money" and in this case ..just a jealous.poor,angry mommmy,I will retire from this blog..but boy I sure loved seeing someone give it right back to that money hungry,bitter baby maker! I would use the word mommmy but it is not appropriate here! She is no kind mommy! She also is scared to tell you what city she is from..strange!
omg- you are so the same person posting back to support your other post. How pathetic!
Anyone real wouldn't need to validate themselves by identifying there locale on an anonymous blog.
Just to clarify, the only two posts I've made are the original post and the one tonight at 6:28. I just got around to reading the blog - never done this before. I hired the baby nurse through an agency in NYC (Absolute Best Care). No further comment.
All agencies should require nannies or baby nurses to present ID's and encourage parents to check for them. Doesn't sound like an honest agency... they should refund you the money and hope they don't get sued.
To Jane Doe- Thank you. I wasn't sure how much you monitored this blogs feedback. No more potty mouth here. Even when others are very naughty! I just hope others here start to value what I have found on your blog. The whole purpose of these sightings is to be an extra set of eyes out there for moms. It's hard not to pipe in when someone is being bashed for their parenting style.
And to everyone here, play nice. Calling someone a LES is just plain rude. (as is biatches..
sorry!)
LES is an abbreviation for someone who lives on the lower east side of Manhattan. As in DWF LES would be a divorced white female on the lower east side.
I just have to say, that as a professional nanny, I think you mothers are out of control. First off, professional nannies do not defend those bad nannies who are making mockery out of our jobs, rather, we'd like to see them fired just as much as you would. Second, in no way to do dis stay at home moms, moms who work from home, or those employing nannies. I have learned from exeperience and I can tell you that other nannies have as well, that no matter how much money you have, or don't have, at the end of the day it is about how much time and attention you give your children. How much love you show them and who they grow up to be. Whether you spank your child or don't, whether you employ services or don't, the only thing that matters is the children. As a nanny, I would also caution about hiring anyone without proper background checks, ids, and references. Ask the right questions, get the right results, ask the wrong ones or non at all, then don't blame anybody but yourself. I would never work for a family that didn't want to check me out extensivly, after all, I'm living in your home, and taking care of what is your most treasured gift from God. Professional nannies are always around, always looking for good jobs, and looking for good families, those who treat us with respect. I refuse to work for a family that does not respect me and my experience and education. That being said, I do feel extremely bad to the mother who posted this originally, you are feeling the fears every first time parents feels, plus a horrible babynurse on top of that, choose to learn from this lesson and move on, your baby will never remember this and in the future, when hiring any childcare, please check references and double check them. And to those mothers on here who are bad mouthing each other, seriously high school was years ago, don't try to relive it again.
This is a frightening story. I hope the OP doesn't feel she was at fault - although, we can all learn a lesson from this and be more careful in the future about checking IDs. Luckily, this is not the norm. The real Monica should be banned from ever working again as a babynurse and the agency should be reported to the BBB.
jen....waaaayyyyyyy out there.
I agree. This is a very scary story. The OP was not at fault and was very brave to share it! Thank you!
to 1053..I think you are the OP!!!!
Just read the blog.took about 40 minutes... the only comment worth reading was from the mokeynanny. big props!!..Boo to the dominating blogger talking $$ and social stautus having anything to do with caring for your children!AS for Lauren's husband..dude..hope she only talks $$ and never talks bedroom..geez.. For the young boys posing as grown women, hh and anonymous, trashing everyone with made-up scenarios and name calling.. You are out of line and childish and to the nanny basher,we can always count on you to show up sooner or later.. last but not least to jen..whoa girl..whoa!
To all of you parents choosing not to ID that is your right but the consequenses are also yours ..please don't shift the blame to others!!This was a lesson for many.Thank you for sharing. Your baby is safe and for that we are glad!
As a mother who has employed a baby nurse 2/out of the three times- I can honestly say after speaking by phone to the agency at length and speaking to the baby nurse by phone; the last thing I thought to do was card the woman who showed up at my door in a nursing whites at the designated time. I don't plan to have any children in the future, but this is a great warning for anyone who uses a babynurse!
good thing you don't have any more children planned..you'd probably hand them over to a stranger too!
Merry Christmas to you ALL!!!
Regarding women who post on these boards. I do go to another women's chatboard and I can tell you that the people who type some of the most vile and immature things could as easily be vile and immature as they are proper and professional. Sometimes it is a sweet relief not to have to bow and curtsy and walk on eggshells and say what you really mean. I think there is a line to avoid crossing-but I think we live longer for having an outlet!
As a long time nanny I have to say, it is very rare that parents hiring a nanny or baby nurse through an agency ask for I. D. OP, you were doing what most parents do. This should be a warning for those hiring in the future. Maybe agencies should forward a copy of the employee's photo I.D. before the interview.
I signed up to and completed a fairly intense application & screening process to do evening and weekend babysitting. The pay was $15 an hour cash in my pocket at the minimum-more for more children. Not that I am proud of it, but there were times I booked gigs and had better (social) plans come along. Rather than lose future bookings, I sent a friend to pose as me. Most of the time I went to upscale hotels, so there was no risk of getting caught. The friend I sent in my place were good people. They didn't have the same skills and references I had, but they did have some experience with children. So if you think this case is rare, think again. I was never id'd ever. Nor were either of my friends showing up in my place.
625, thanks! I am not from the New York area, and did jump to conclusions. And thank you for stating that as nicely as you did!
And 1201, hahaha!! That was funny! Young boys posing as grown women! I don't think they really are, but still funny! And just so you know, yeah, hands have been slapped. My horse in reigned in.
Merry Christmas to everyone here! I hope you all have a wondrful holiday with your loved ones!
I never understood how there could be a postion of "baby nurse" They are not nurses, but I bet the agency charges what an actual nurse would cost.
AS far responsibility, I am not at all comfortable at how it was handled. The mom discoved the "baby nurse" was a fraud, paid her CASH, then let her walk away?
I probably wouldn't have asked for ID. I have never been asked for ID, and infact have never had references called (ever, even once) as a nanny or a child care provider out of my home. I would happliy show it if asked, but never have been.
I do think the OP made a huge mistake lettin the woman walk. What about other families? She needed to hold the agency reponsible. Too bad!
What kind of parents allow a fraud to lay hands on a newborn baby and then after finding out she was a fraud..pay her!! Something does not add up here. Not to mention all of you who do not feel the parents should not be held responsible??!! What is wrong with all of you??? Does this story truly make sense to you? Paying a fraud who just tricked you into handing over your newborn???? gat with it people!!! Mom & dad are out there!!!
This story cannot possibly make sense to someone to whom the whole concept of a baby nurse is foreign. So let me clue you in. When you have someone come in your house to take care of your children and it doesn't work out-for whatever reason, you do whatever you need to to get them out of the house fast. Didn't you see the Hand that Rocks the Cradle?
The last nanny I had to fire, I over compensated just because. All I wanted was her out and away from my children!
"And educated people do not resort to physical discipline. (Unless they are sadistic monsters)."
127...ha ha ha ha ha. I'm not going to give you my parents' education level, my bosses' education level, my education level, none of that, because you are living on another planet if you really believe what you posted.
Ignorant people resort to physical discipline. It is archaic, barbaric and criminal. With so many options and so much guidance for parents and caretakers available, that a parent would put a hand on a child to teach a lesson is unforgivable.
1210 you are so wrong! You just don't like the fact that some one chooses a different method of discipline that you happen to disagree with. Educated and affluent people will continue to spank children. It is the yuppie,keep up with the Jones's,wannabee, PC crowd like you that will preach Time outs and attack those of us that choose to spank our children!
Amelia..you are right on the money!!! Nice to see that some people actually think for themselves and do what is right for them and not just what society says we should do! Thank you for your post!
Spank = To hit a child.
That has nothing to do with keeping up with the Joneses! I don't know any affluent or highly educated people that spank their children. Is is strictly low rent discipline.
(for the feeble minded).
I really felt the need to post, I've been reading this blog group for awhile now, and being an owner of a reputable nanny agency in California I would like to give both nanny, and family advice.
If the nanny agency is reputable, they should be sending you out what we call a welcome packet. Each nanny should have her Driver's license picture and Social Security card on hand with the agency, which in turn goes to the family before the hired help is admitted into the home.
Also, some of the agencies have an actual full size picture of their nanny, at least we do: You should ALWAYS interview before they begin employment:
And for the nannies. A lot of you think agencies are tough on you, because of the paperwork, and our high demands. But turn it around. If these were your precious children, would you expect any less?
International nannies association is the best website to find a "licensed, reputable agency" You can also contact them regarding the service you had gotten with a nanny agency, good or bad, and they will be marked down and not allowed into this association.
I hope this helps ;)
The same thing happened to my family one in January. Absolute Best Care was our agency and an imposter came to our home. 9 months later and they still refuse to refund our money. I would like to discuss this with the originator of this blog. Please post a new comment and we can figure out how to get in touch.
not sure if my last comment went through. the same thing happened to us with absolute best care. an imposter came to our home and we didn't figure it out until 6 hours later. i would like to speak with the originator of this blog entry. i created an account for you to contact me at - imposternanny@gmail.com
we are pursuing this and perhaps there is strength in numbers.
to all who wish to shift blame onto the exhausted parents of a newborn who relies on a "reputable" agency to provide them with a legit baby nurse/nanny... when you go to the hospital for surgery, do you get a photo id of the anesthesiologist? or do you trust that the hospital ran background checks and that the man/woman injecting the medication is in fact who he/she says he is? would it bother you at all if later you discovered that the person who performed your epidural was the friend of the anesthesiologist and had no medical training at all?
Anesthesiologist?
I would be pissed if my gardener was using a fake identity and he only handles my gladiolas.
Rogue nannies need to be incarcerated. And people using fake identities- illegals- need to be shipped back to their country and micro chipped so they can never return to the US without setting off an annoying beep.
Until we clean house, it is too hard to keep track of ALL OF THE ILLEGALS.
Why go through pregnancy, c-section, childbirth, invitro and bring a life into our world if you are going to have another person enter your home and become so scared and worried about them all the time? I'm so glad our family does not have all these problems, this sounds like an awful way to live.
I agree, seems like lots of problems there? Better to relax a bit and enjoy the child.
I am a Newborn Specialist for a long time and the people I worked for never asked for ID, however, I have registered with a few agencies and they requested ID so now I am wondering what happened to the copy of the ID. My belief was that the purpose was that they would keep a copy and pass on the copy to the employers so that they could see what the prospective Newborn Specialist looks like, but I guess not. I was told that they need it to do background checks.
Everyone in this unfavorable event must take blame and sad to say that Monica should not have sent another person without the agency knowing, but she did it for a fee from the fake Monica even if she said she was struggling for money. It is not the usual thing for parent to ask for ID but as this has happened and probably is still happening I believe that parents should demand ID. Work permit is not so much of an issue because there are so many jobs that Americans don't want to attempt you will find that a person without a work permit will do in a hurry.
Nevertheless, taking care of a child almost round the clock is so tiring and tedious and most mothers are too ill and are in too much pain to do it all by themselves and then the fathers have to go to work and no matter what they need the help, it doesn't have to be round the clock. Sometimes some family member may opt to help but after two or three days they get tired.
With all said and done I believe that if people want to Hire Newborn Specialist it should be for a short period just so that they can recuperate from delivery but some want six months to a year I believe that is time for other considerations.
Even though I am a Newborn Specialist I look at people who can't afford this kind of help and they get up at nights and take care of their children and sometimes I think that others can do the same but sleep is a luxury to many.
Please do not blame Specialists for charging a lot because they are the ones who are going for weeks without sleep, it is well worth the money but if you don't have the finance, don't pretend and follow your friends and hire that kind of help. You just have to learn that there are changes to be made in your household and that would mean less sleep and more work. if you can afford it and it is your choice, why not enjoy it?
As a Newborn Specialist I would like to extend my regards to the family who hired the person who posed as Monica, although I believe that Monica would not have sent anyone who would be dangerous, or intended to harm someone else's baby, she wanted to help this person in a financial way but took the wrong step out of greed. I am happy that you worked with your instinct.
I would like to advise all parents who are requesting help from agencies to do some research for your selves, although it is unfair to know that you are paying for the service, or you can have the agency send you a copy of the report on background checks and name and numbers of references, along with photo ID of the person who is expected to come into your home. I believe the background check may be difficult if the person does not have a work permit, but there are ways to find out about criminal records. Check with the local Police. The next thing is that when there is a call for urgent help it is difficult to get these things done. Nevertheless please use wise judgment.
Have to catch up on this one too, but I'm with those who say that anyone who'd let a stranger walk right in and be alone with their newborn infant based solely on the word of a third party that everything should be fine is so stupid they should probably not have children. Also that the agency can not reasonably be held responsible. Do most agencies personally come to the house and do a visual check to make sure the person they sent to fill the position is the same person who showed up to do the job? And we don't frink the Maytag man or the UPS driver because...DUH, we are not leaving them alone with our newborn infant for 8 hours or more at a time. Would you even leave the room with the Maytag guy and your newborn baby there?
And I am just greatly amused here at how so many people are declaring themselves smart and educated, and the rest of the world ignorant dumbasses, yet practically every single post is written by someone confused over where/were/wear/ware, there/their/they're, sight/site, your/you're, an/and, etc etc etc. Even the ones bragging about how rich they are. It's really hilarious.
Make that frisk, not frink. LOL!
Good grief!! Look at ALL the anonymous comments!! I'm so glad they don't allow that anymore, it's too damn hard to follow up on anybody else's comment.
Every Doctors have certificate and her professional or government id card.
I had been encouraged this web site through the relative. I do not know regardless of whether this submit will be provided by means of him as no one learn these specific roughly my issues. You might be extraordinary! Thank you so much!
Am I understanding this? A "Nanny" is a trained and documented, experienced person and a "Baby Nurse" is little more than a babysitter hired off the streets? Lets not forget that NURSE is a professional title that nobody should be using unless they have gone through a rigorous and thorough education and passed the licensing exam. Last I checked, a high school dropout could be a flipping nanny.
These "agencies" should be much more concerned about sending out people with the title NURSE when clearing they are nothing of the sort, then making sure a NANNY is who she says she is.
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