Friday

I saw your nanny ..... leaving...for good

Received Thursday, October 20, 2006
I am your nanny. While it is technically impossible to see myself. I do. I seem myself starting earlier and earlier and working later and later. I see that this does not register on your face. You know- that my time is valuable. I see myself every afternoon helping your six year old son with his homework because God forbid, there be some left over when you walk in the door. He is afraid of your screaming intolerance, you know? Everyday, I see you leave lists for me. The tasks grow more and more menial. I signed a contract. It didn't involve setting the table or starting dinner or making dinner and it certainly didn't involve staying until after dinner so that I could wash your dishes. Isn't it enough that you leave your crusty hodge podge of la perla and target undergarments heaped on the washer knowing that I will wash them without even being asked? For ten months, I have done everything that you have asked of me and more. I work late without notice and without pay. I take phone messages, supervise other workers who show up. I washed your car last week. Here at the house. With a hose. Just like you asked. I take your son to school. I keep your daughter with me always. I take your daughter to the park every day. I seek out adventurous places to take her. Places that might capture her imagination and stimulate her mind. You did realize that on your birthday I got you a bottle of your favorite perfume? Granted, it was only $70 dollars but would a thank you have been so hard to muster up? When for my birthday, I received a $25 dollar gift certificate to Sam Goody, I hand wrote you a thank you note. Every day for ten months I have walked in to your house and given 120 percent only to have you look down your nose at me and think of humiliating tasks to assign to me. Tomorrow is Friday. And the next time someone see YOUR nanny, (me) she will be working for a family that will be paying her $200 more a week, with zero housekeeping responsibilities and only one child. I hate to leave without notice or anything, but your just so cruel and unpredictable. Ciao.

35 comments:

Anonymous said...

Preach on sister! I wish more nannys were like you. I work for an amazing family, for amazing pay, and hate hearing stories like this. Note to nannies: Stop being treated like trash, and be true to yourself and your work. There are great families out there. And to families: Treat your nanny well, and she will be good to you. I promise.

Anonymous said...

Why didn't you just say "no" to these ridiculous requests?

Anonymous said...

I too am a full time nanny for over 10 years for a wonderful family. Why do professional nannies put up with this abuse. How about a website for abused nannies? There are many wonderful families out there so good for you.....go find them and leave these abusers.

WN said...

Nannies. A tough ballgame. You get it right and it really changed your life. Anything less & someone gets screwed.

Anonymous said...

Good for you!

Anonymous said...

WN- WHAT IN THE HELL WAS THAT I CLICKED ON?

Claire said...

You sound like a "real nanny" being treated like a household servant. What a mess this whole thing is. We have houskeepers who speak 9 words of English being called Nannies and then people like you (who can't say no) being walked all over by *sshole employers. I have the best job in the world. Single fathers are the best employers, nannies! And if you are a good nanny- never settle for any job. For true professionals, it is a nanny market.

Claire said...

PS, wn, what was that?

Anonymous said...

WN ROCKS!

Anonymous said...

rock on! i just left a similar situation today. it feels soooo good.

Anonymous said...

I am just so happy you told that lady off!!!!!!!!!!! That was so impressive and inspiring and I truly hope you find a family who will treat a hundred times better. I cant stand evil bitches, and honey you laid her out and let her have it, so power to you! I wish you the best, and hopefully she will see this and be humiliated for what she did to you.

A said...

Really? I thought she was ridiculously nice. I would have swiped some silver and blumpkined her husband on the way out. But that's me. That's how I roll. No one gets away with treating me like that.

Anonymous said...

WN, did you make that cartoon?
Are you white nanny?

Anonymous said...

You teach people how to treat you--but at least you're taking a stand now. Why not say all that you've written here to your former employer's face? You need to teach her that she cannot treat her nannies this way.

Anonymous said...

say it to her face? do you think a woman like that would care? a woman like that will take her hate and loathing out on the children next. bdtd. The next nanny will be a big, mean brute. And that will be fine for the kids.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you stood up for yourself. I'm just sad for the children who were in your care. If their mother had any sense, (which she clearly doesn't) she would have put her children's needs before her own. You were taking such good care of them in her place and now who knows who will take over for you? How sad, but I totally agree with and support you!! :)

Anonymous said...

Seriously, why the victim mentality? Why did you do all that stuff? You should have drawn the line a long time ago.

Anonymous said...

Not original poster but perhaps the employer wasnt a btch for the first 2 weeks. And by that time, the nanny really liked and was on her way to loving the kids. It is sad to be selfless in this world. People will trample your soul. Shout out to all of Marge Ingersol's beaten, threatened and maligned nannies.

Anonymous said...

Good for you Nanny lady! I hope the b*tch mom sees this and knows it's her you were talking to.

hyu said...

I relate to you. I too am a nanny for more than 5 years. I love the kids and the mum says Im like family buy when I was sick really bad recently she didnt treat me like family, not paying me and not even coming to visit me while I was home for a very long time. I was heartbroken. I too wash her clothes and her husbands drawerers, work long hours with just thank you, I love those kids to death but I always ask myself is it worth it. I always tell myself Im going to leave because there has to be something out there better but I havent found the courage yet, especially since I recently came back from a very long sick leave. I admire you for taking a stand but there are a lot of us out there who are mistreated on a regular basis and a forum like this just makes us look bad. All the nannies are not bad some of us are really genuine, it is ironic it is the bad nannies those who have no love for the kids those who work just for the money those are the nannies that the parents praise and love and give generously at holidays etc because the nannies fool them and they are blind to a lot of stuff while people like you and me and many others suffer silently.

Anonymous said...

Employer here. With a well paid nanny. Who is like family to me. And I don't think this site makes "you" look bad. I agree as was referenced somewhere else that all of these "bad" nannies are there because of employers who don't take the time to find appropriate childcare. My nanny has nanny friends and let me tell you, there is a class system in the USA and there is a class system even with nannies. And none of these nannies would sit in the same circle as my own. How horrible to be sick and on leave from a job that requires you to take care and to have no such care provided to you in return. You are the exceptions to the rule. The good nannies that mistakably get snatched up by evil employers. Sometimes an evil nanny lands in the home of a genuine and kind employer. None of it fair. We must raise the standards of childcare in this country. A nanny needs to be a recognized, credentialed profession.

Annie said...

Good for you for getting out. I was in a similar position not very long ago. I worked for a family for nearly three years and was utterly in love with and devoted to the children. I worked my tail off for them and took all sorts of initiative: I taught them sign language to communicate with their language-delayed son; I helped their older child (age 7) write and illustrate a book; I spent hours of my off-time researching summer day camps and local sports clubs; I designed an entire preschool curriculum. And yet all of that went unnoticed and unthanked. Instead I regularly got nasty notes informing me that I had forgot to put a cup in the dishwasher or I had folded laundry incorrectly. As time went on, my list of menial household chores got longer and longer. (When I accepted the job, I'd been promised NO housekeeping.)

When they decided to blow their money on a $60K home theater, they complained incessantly about how overpaid nannies were and how unfair it was that they had to pay me so much. I never once complained about my salary even though I had never received a raise and during my employment I had received no less than a half-dozen job offers, all of which offered more money. I turned those offers down because I loved the children and wanted to do what was best for them. And I never mentioned the job offers to my employers because I didn't want it to sound like I was threatening them in order to get a raise.

Finally I couldn't take it anymore. They lied to me one too many times and I quit. It took me four days to find a job with parents who treated me with respect and paid $200/week more than what I was making. I hated to leave the children, but it was the best decision I ever made. My friends said the difference in my outlook on life was noticeable overnight.

Good for you for getting out. I hope your new job works out as well as mine did.

Anonymous said...

Good For You A family like that doesn't deserve notice...

Anonymous said...

I could have written this. I only wish I had the balls to leave too.

Good luck! I know you will be so much happier!

Anonymous said...

Thank god, a nanny told their employer off! I worked for this b*tch for three yrs. I made the same as I did in the begin. She made me watch her screaming twins for 10hrs a day and then go and make dinner and finnish cleaning every litte goddamn inch of her house for 200 a week. What sucks is the going rate in DC, is about 800 a week for one kid with no other respondsiblities. So, I told her to F*ck Off and I'm now the owner of a nanny agency. My nannies all rock.

Anonymous said...

ALL THE BEST.
GIRL I AM aLSO FAMOUS IN ISaWYOURNANNY .I BELIVE WE NANNYS HAVE TO BE MORE OPEN aND LET THEM KNOW HOW WE FEEL BECOUSE THaT WHaT THEY DO.WE CaNNOT LET THEM BELIVE THaT WE aRE STUPED aLL THE TIME BECOUSE WE NOT.

Anonymous said...

OMG- Why did you write this? I hope you are not a nanny. You type like a serial killer. What in God's name are you famous for?

Anonymous said...

I am all about this!!! Most "richies" are sooo unappretiative of their "help". I am a housekeeper and on more than one occasion have had to become the nanny, errand girl, ass wiper, secretary, holiday decorator etc....Power to us "little" guys!!!

Anonymous said...

I am so absolutely proud of you. I know exactly the abuse you must have gone through. You will be OK. You are articulate, intelligent and I am sure reliable. You must feel very liberated. You rock

ja said...

If being a nanny is so sucky, why not go out and do something else? I'm tired of nannies with "poor me" attitudes. And is it so terrible to take phone messages? Get a life!

Anonymous said...

The "get a life" poster is the most ignorant of all posters! I loathe her!

Anonymous said...

Good for you: I had a similar experience myself. I am very proud of you and you should be too!
Your boss sounds just like my old one... she was a doctor yet I would come in some mornings to find a dirty diaper on the coffee table that had been there since the night before!
Also, they were alcoholics and the little toddler would smell like beer alot of mornings because they left their beer around for the toddler to sample and pour over herself. I felt so bad for the kid and was so happy when I quit!
My hours also got later and later and totally not what was in my contract. They felt that if they came home a half hour earlier some nights it gave them license to come home two hours later on most other nights.
Again, good for you. You are all of our voices...

Valerie Mecham said...

I hope you called CPS on those parents! That is endangerment!

Anonymous said...
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Anonymous said...

Uh, 9:44
While we do get a bit saucy on here at times, your language crosses the line. Please be more considerate. Thank you.