Received Friday, October 10, 2008. - Perspective & Opinion
I have a question and I would like your input. I just started a new nanny job and I have been working for this family for about a month so far. It is only part-time, only 10 hours a week.
My problem is that I have already called in sick two times. One time I was extremely nauseous and couldn't come in and today I have a 102 fever and it is impossible to make the drive to work. I feel like if I was the mother I would think of me as unreliable since I have missed two days already, and it is only part-time. She is polite about it, but I still feel like I am making a bad impression. I usually do not get very sick that often, my fever came yesterday from left field and blew me away. I really do value reliability, but seriously I was really sick these two times.
For some reason, this has been bothering me a lot. I know I should be concentrating on getting better, but I still feel like I am making a bad impression.
For the record, the job pays $10/hourly and I only get 10 hours weekly. The drive is 25-30 minutes away from my house, so round-trip I have 50min-1 hour drive.
Any advice would be great. Thank you guys so much in advance. :)
What kind of advice do you want?
ReplyDeleteSTOP GETTING SICK!
Kidding.
I will say, that's a lot of driving for 10 bucks an hour, 10 hours a week...I'd rethink that with gas prices being what they are.
Ditto Jersey. Not worth it.
ReplyDeleteIf you want to be considered a good employee.. I would get to work even though you don't feel your best. It's just part of being an adult, sorry.
ReplyDeleteI know it's tough to go to work sick, but when you first start out a job, you really do have to push yourself. Only you know how sick you really are, but in my own experience, people who begin by calling out sick usually continue to. Of course there is always an exception to the rule, but generally there are people who call out sick alot and then there are people who do not.
ReplyDeleteWhat have you been like in your past jobs? Just curious. And I hope you feel better soon!
What umass said
ReplyDeleteIt's harder for a nanny to go to work sick than it is for people in other professions. You don't want to get those little guys sick.
ReplyDeleteI'll go to work with a little cold or an upset stomach, but that's about it. I had strep throat this entire week and my charges' mother actually asked ME to stay home, even though I was more than willing to come in (poor me, so broke).
So while I do agree with you Sarah, that it IS part of being an adult, the children's health also needs to be considered.
I agree with what jersey said. Its hard to come in sick when you know you could be getting the little guys sick.
ReplyDeletealthough, there is a limit and if you can handle being there and if you have a cold or just an upset stomach or something, you can deal and still go. It helps out alot if you are allowed a certain amount of sickdays.
I don't know any parent who would want their child to be exposed to a stomach virus or have a fever of 102. The fever is particularly worrisome and I'm shocked that some of you think that just pushing through it is the best thing. Working with immune suppressed children over the years, coming in sick would have been a death nail in my employment and I would have been fired.
ReplyDeleteOP, I don't know the whole circumstances as to why you'd chose to work for what the conditions of your job provide. If you want to keep the job, have a talk with the parents, tell them how incredibly sorry you are for your illness.
nomdeplume,
ReplyDeleteanyone who has worked in a childcare center can tell you that many parents don't put their caregiver's health high on the list of priorities. I'm sad to say that there are countless parents who couldn't give a crap that their caregiver is sick. They only care when their child is sick and is told they need to stay home and take care of them. Of course no good parent would want this, but there are countless people who wouldn't care.
as far as "pushing it" it is a sad reality but if you want to be seen as reliable, you push it when you have a new job. it is sad but true. does it mean someone is an unreliable person if they happen to get sick in their first weeks of a job? Of course not, but that is what it looks like. And that is reality.
I usually inform them that I am sick and let them decide if they want me to come in or not. Alot of times, I've been around the child so much, that he/she has been exposed already, anyway. I've noticed now, that the parents are doing the same for me. They call and tell me the child is sick and do I want to come in. The exception, If I'm really bad and know I can't make it then I just tell them and no-one has ever had a problem. Too bad it's happened twice so soon for you though.
ReplyDeleteI can't even count how many times I've seen parents giving kids Tylenol in the parking lot of the child care center I used to work at. Most parents would rather drop the kids off regardless if they were ill all night or had a fever when they woke up. The reality is parents have to work too. Part of the reason parents hire nannies is for the consistency of care.
ReplyDeleteOP you could have very well got the bugs you had from the child you work with. Take some Tylenol and rough it out would be my advice. As a parent I would be really irritated that you had called in twice already.
I agree with most of the posters. I know you're only human OP, but it doesn't look good to miss days so early on. Unfair, sure, but such is life. I wouldn't want to call in sick in the first month of my non-nannying job either. Anyway, stop stressing about though, let it go. Besides, you are working for a crazy rock-bottom wage and I doubt your employers is stressed with guilt over that!!
ReplyDeleteI'm a nanny as well and have been for 6 years. My most recent job that just ended (the kids started school) was only 12 hours/week. The dad didn't work so my time with them was so the dad could take a break, run errands, go biking, etc. It usually was not IMPORTANT that I be there. However, I was with them for a year and a half and I called in probably 2-3 times. When you are working so few hours it's especially important and it does look bad if you miss a lot of work. I think it looks worse than if you are working full time. You have only been there a month, work 10 hours a week, and have called in twice. So yes, I'm sure the parents are thinking you're not reliable and you aren't taking the job seriously.
ReplyDeleteThe only advice I could really give you is to talk to the parents and explain your situation. And, like others said, sometimes you may just have to suck it up and go in sick. If you are only working 10 hours a week I can't assume you are working very long days.
First of all, it sounds like this job is costing YOU money if you get paid $10/hr and drive that far to work 10 hours a week. It really doesn't seem like it's worth it.
ReplyDeleteIf you are sick, (which it sounds like you really are)then you should not being going to work. I'm sure the parents would be even more upset if you showed up to work with a 102 fever. I would recommend taking better care of yourself so you don't get sick as often.
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ReplyDeleteNo offense, but if I were your employer the warning bells would be going off and I would already be looking for the shoe to drop again and dismiss you.
ReplyDeleteI also agree with other poster's that the commute time does not make the job worth it.
I do hope you get to feeling better. Bad timing to be sick, but what can you do? Unfortunate set of circumstances.
mary @11:10..the dad didnt work but needed a break? from what? Sorry this just threw me off.
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ReplyDeleteorangecounty...he probably needed a break from taking care of his kids so he could run errands, go biking and whatever else mary said. its quite normal, much why some parents decide to get nannies
ReplyDeletealso, I totally like was Umass last posted. and adding onto that, a lot of people don't realize that a lot of parents don't care if their child care provider is sick or not, and many probably should. But being a nanny is a lot different then a lot of other jobs, we don't have coworkers (most dont) so its not like we can call someone to see if they can work for us because we dont' feel well. And just like OP, it does come off badly depending on how often we're sick and if the job is still newish.
Umass, it has little to do with if they care for the caregiver and everything to do with not infecting children. I can't believe that smart intelligent parents want sickness in their households. I'm a veteran nanny of almost 20 years and I've never had a boss who asked if I could come in to work while I was truly sick. It would be detrimental to household for rampant viruses to run through it. My current boss does care, won't even let me take care of a sick child because she doesn't want me to get infected. She supplies all sorts of holistic precautions and vitamins when anyone gets sick. So no, I don't for one second believe that parents who truly care about their own children want infected nannies to show up for work. A little common sense here.
ReplyDeleteI appreciate all your input and advice. In this profession, it is much easier to get sick since I have such close contact with small children, such as changing their diapers, etc. It can be a catch-22 since parents value reliability as their #1 priority, but at the same time, the caregiver has to have such close contact with the child.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I would have tried to suck it up and go to work, but with my fever I had extreme nausea as well and the driving part worried me! And being sick and laid up in bed has given me lots of time to ponder, and I started to realize that I wasn't making very much considering the distance and number of hours. For the record, I live in Southern CA.
Anyway, thanks for the advice and I will consider everything. I had posted a question a few weeks back, gotten great advice and used it and saw positive results so I really value what everyone on here has to say.
Umm nomde, that's a brazen accusation to make.
ReplyDeleteI'm not suggesting anyone infect their children intentionally, but they DO need to be exposed to the elements so their immune systems can function when they're too old to be stuck inside their super-sterile homes.
nomdeplume,
ReplyDeleteBelieve it. It happens. Sorry to break it to you, but smart, intelligent people are sometimes selfish and act foolishly at times when it comes to missing out on a day of work and making "the jing" (money.) I am talking about doctors, lawyers, professionals etc. I have seen it happen.
It has everything to do with caring about your childcare provider as well as your children: some people don't care about either as much as they do their jobs. If you value your child, you should value the health of their caregivers. And sadly, some people see their caregivers as "less than human" and someone less than human couldn't possibly get their child sick, right? I realize this is not sound logic. But nobody ever said that book-smarts equal common sense, and they certainly do not equal common decency. Some of the worst parents I have encountered have been highly educated professionals. Some of the best have been low-income.
I don't doubt you have not encountered people like this. I can tell from your post. But they do exist in abundance. I think these people do care about their children: they just care more about their jobs. Sad but true.
I had a similar experience with my first "real" nanny job. I came down with a bad flu bug of some sort on my second day of work. I felt terrible, both physically and because I knew I had to call in sick. I called the mom and told her what was going on with me, and offered to make up the hours over the weekend assuming I was feeling better. She was glad I called in because nobody wants a sick person around their 8-week old! It was awkward and I hated doing it, but it ended up being fine. I pushed myself to always be a few minutes early and help out more than I needed to, especially in the beginning, so she knew I wasn't a flake.
ReplyDeleteDon't go to work if you are really sick... it's not fair to you or the kids. Stay home and get better, then go in and be a fantastic nanny when you are better.
i personally don't think it's fair for yourself or anyone else to expect you to work when you truly feel bad.
ReplyDeletewhen i truly feel bad, i don't work. it's not just because I don't want to get the kids sick either.
please don't listen to crazy people who think that it's okay to "push yourself" and that it's "part of being an adult"
that's a sad way to live!
i can't believe how many people can be so cold and uncaring towards a person who is sick, and yet you expect that same person to care when your child is sick?
ReplyDeletethe bottom line is, if your boss doesn't beleive your sick, he or she is a distrustful piece of crap. LIFE happens. are you supposed to quit your job if the kid throws up on your or wets the bed twice in one week?
sorry but it's hypocritical for a boss so uncaring to expect you to show up and care for their child and put up with their snotty, spitty, poopy, barfy germs.
i certainly could not pretend to be caring if i had to show up to work sick myself.
Well 1, as someone suggested OP, IF you decide to keep the job, go above and beyond a bit to help your bosses feel more secure at having hired you. 2, I would NOT want anyone sick taking care of my child. And 3, some of you make it sound as though the employer's jobs are all completely optional and they have as many sick days as they need in a year and they are just "selfish" to not "want" to miss a day of work. Newsflash: it's not just nanny employers who expect their employees to show up reliably, as scheduled, and perform their job duties on a daily basis with reasonably few exceptions. What happens when a nanny's employer has used up all THEIR sick days to cover for when the nanny called in sick, and now THEY have a fever of 102? Don't pull out the old bullshit that they are all CEO's and can come and go as they please. The real world is not like that.
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ReplyDeleteI'm now a nanny. I used to be the employer of some 45-50 workers. (guess which job I like best?)
ReplyDeleteThe truth is, it's so easy to say that an employer is so cold and uncaring. "OMG, how can you be so mean? I'm so sick!!!" HOwever, how many times does it take to get burnt by fire before you learn? Believe me, I've had people call me sounding like they were on the brink of death call in to work, only to spy them out on some date later that night.
The point is, OP. You said yourself that "She is polite about it, but I still feel like I am making a bad impression"
Of course you are making a bad impression! You haven't had time enough to build a relationship with her to know that you actually are reliable.
However, it sounds like she is a decent enough employer (i.e. being polite) that she is giving you the benefit of the doubt. Get well, and then give it 110% during the hours you are there, so next time you're sick, perhaps she'll be the one bringing over the chicken noodle soup :)
sorry for the repost. Not sure why it published anonymous.
ReplyDeleteAre you pregnant?
ReplyDeleteThanks for all the great advice.
ReplyDeleteI told my employer it was probably the stomach flu and I ended up taking another day off. I told her I would completely understand if she hired another nanny and I knew I had made a bad impression by calling in sick three days out of five weeks. Guess what? She told me I was not making a bad impression, that I could not help being sick and she has been sick before and knows how it is. She told me I take excellent care of her child and that she really appreciates all I do for her baby while she has to work.
I guess some people understand and some do not. This is obviously a divided issue and I guess I am just blessed to have an understanding employer. That made it easier to be sick, since I didn't have to emotionally stress myself out about losing my job.
I guesss it is better for parents to have a great nanny who maybe does get sick a little more often than most, than having a bad nanny who never misses a work day! Food for thought. :)
I am only joking.