I saw this nanny with her perhaps three and a half year old charge. A cute little girl fair skinned/white, round face, large eyes with very curly medium length dark hair up in a pony tail. She was wearing pink shorts that had colorful polka dots printed on them.The nanny/caretaker I presume was tall and stout or heavy but not fat, dark skinned, full lips with a straight bob wig, wearing walking shorts and a P.S.10* (I can't remember the last number,maybe 3 or 7) gray camp T shirt, that said STAFF on the back in green.
They were in front of Duane Reade on 86th street in Manhattan UES, between 2nd and 3rd Ave, obliquely opposite Barnes and Noble and close to the 86th street bus stop.
The woman was SMOKING, supposedly taking a break from going somewhere or waiting for the bus or something.
I was appalled.
I wondered if this was OK with her parents, to have someone smoke a cigarette in front of their child.
They were out in broad daylight at around 10:30am, but I am still wondering.
The little girl wasn't complaining or anything. She just stood there and peered into the store window as though she was accustomed to "smoking breaks".
If I were her mother, being a non smoker, I would definitely want to know about this.
Lets see ..a nanny who does not smoke but sits on her butt all day at the park,ignoring kids and chatting on a cellphone or reading a book versus a nanny who takes the kid for walks or runs errand,keeping the kid close,but smokes.
ReplyDeleteThose seem to be the kind of nannies we are always hearing about.
I'll take the smoking nanny who has my kid out and about!jmo
btw,I am a non-smoker
I'm a smoker but I do NOT smoke anywhere near kids I take care of. It is irresponsible and I know it is a bad habit.
ReplyDeleteIf the parents don't know their nanny is a smoker, hopefully they see this post. If they do know and are ok with it... well, I don't agree but what can ya do?
With the reports out on the dangers of second hand smoke, this is definitely a problem. As a Mom, I don't want my kids around smokers while they smoke. I don't want it glamorized in any way. There is enough peer pressure regarding smoking at a young age that they need no encouragement from any other sources. That's just how my husband and I feel and how we try to raise our kids. I hope the parents of this child see this if, for some reason, they are unaware their caregiver smokes.
ReplyDelete'Keep searching...' what about second hand smoke and lung cancer?
ReplyDeleteThese are REAL consequenses that could occur.
My aunt is dying of lung cancer.
She exercised, ate healthy, NEVER SMOKED and she is maybe in her early 60's.
It's sad and hurtful.
What/whom do we blame??
I say the people who smoke around us.
Having said that, think you should re think your last statement.
*I think you should re think your last statement.
ReplyDeleteWell, it sounds like from what you described that they were outside. I would understand why you wouldn't want her to smoke around the girl inside, but outside? If the nanny is a smoker, then she must smoke outside, and she must have the girl with her at all times. It's not like she can ask the girl to go inside the bookstore for a little while. I mean, smoking is a terrible habit but we have to live with the fact that some people are addicted. I'm not a smoker, but I know it must be impossible for a lot of smokers to make it through the day without a certain number of smokes. I'm just kind of surprised someone would post this about someone smoking outside.
ReplyDeleteHow could any parent not already know their nanny was a smoker?
ReplyDeleteYou can smell a smoker 5ft away if you're a non-smoker. Sorry, but it's true.
So, if this nanny is out taking a smoke break, I seriously doubt the parents aren't aware. They'd smell it on her, and unfortunately the baby, because the smell would permeate the nanny's clothes.
How very sad though that they would allow their child to be exposed to the 2nd hand smoke, outside or not. Who's to say this nanny doesn't have the child downwind?
Ues ~ my Mom was one of the few smokers (she's now quit ~ YAY!) that used a combination of gardenia/vanilla perfume like it was goin' out of style! I swear, it seemed like she bathed in it. She also chewed gum/ate mints all day to cover the smell. Many, many people showed surprise when they found out she smoked. So it is possible to have a smoker as a nanny and not know it. Not likely, I know, but it is possible.
ReplyDeleteI also think it's not just a matter of being outside or downwind of a child. I know, as a parent, I don't even want my kids around people when they're smoking. Not if there's the possibility it is glamorized or someone they look up to is doing the smoking. Kids are impressionable.
I hate seeing people smoke around children. It blows my mind whenever I see someone smoking at a park...fortunately, it doesn't happen too often.
ReplyDeleteI'm a smoker (though I upgraded from addicted to SOCIAL smoker..a pack every 1 1/2 to 2 weeks..not bad for someone who has been smoking since the age of 11) but I'd never ever smoke around my charge. My employers KNOW I smoke but they also know I don't do it around her or in my car.
There really ISN'T any excuse for a nanny to smoke while on the clock. I don't care how addicted you are. Chew some of that nicotine gum. That'll curb the craving and stop the jitters if it's really THAT bad.
Everyone is so focused on possibly glamorizing cigarette smoking and the dangers thereof, but why is it that parents drink around their children without thinking twice about it?
ReplyDeleteSo many parties, BBQ's, etc., people bringing their families and children then leaving (DRIVING). But that is responsible?
I understand this isn't the topic, but as everyone is so focused on second hand smoke and how appalled many are about seeing people are when they smoke around their children I wanted to make a point that alcohol, IMO, is much more dangerous. Still socially acceptable, doesn't have the nasty reputation that cigarette smoking does, but is just as dangerous and sends the same wrong message.
Sioux
ReplyDeleteThank you!!
I also agree that drinking doesn't carry with it the same social stigma that smoking does - but I grew up in a very dysfunctional alcoholic family. Mom finally quit by the time I was a teen, but dad kept going. I hated every minute of watching them come home from BBQ's and beach parties completely sloshed. It was awful seeing them struggle trying to make it from their car to the front door. How they never got in an accident is beyond me.
Thank you for bringing that up. I know it doesn't have anything to do with the post, but it's still yet another bad habit children are exposed to, and if you ask me, causes just as much damage, if not more.
Smoking isn't a crime and I don't think the simple act of smoking a cigarette in front of a child glamorizes it. In fact sometimes it does the exact opposite. My husband grew up with 2 parents who smoked (still do!) and he never wanted anything to do with it. I agree with the poster(s) who say that as long as it is outside it is not a such a big deal. It is not idea for but far better that than leave the child unattended. Really, what is the big deal? I would not expect a smoking nanny to go a whole day without a cigarette - that is not going to make her day go smoothly! I don't think creating perfect, pristine environments for kids is ever really possible and probably not ideal anyway for their physical or mental health anyway. People smoke, that is reality! I have never been a smoker but I find it a bit much when people villify smokers like they have some kind of character flaw. It is an addiction after all.
ReplyDeleteI am a smoker too and never smoke in the car or around the kids. This childs parents may be smokers too because otherwise they could smell the smoke on the nanny. She was outside and not in an enclosed place so she was not letting the child breath the smoke. None of my
ReplyDeletechildren smoked and neither did my folks. SO I didn't get the urge to smoke from them.
I know I didn't just read a comment that basically condones smoking around children because it's "impossible to keep their environment pristine, and it's not ideal anyway" - so that means it's ok to smoke around them?
ReplyDeleteAnd "I would not expect a smoking nanny to go a whole day without a cigarette - that is not going to make her day go smoothly" - are you serious? Tough shit.
It is NEVER ok to smoke around children, and anyone that would make excuses for it has a screw loose!
Hi Oh No You Didn't, essentially, what I am saying is that I think it is not a horrible crime for a nanny to have a quick smoke OUTSIDE. Sorry, I'm not trying to offend you - and no one is allowed to smoke inside my house - but it's just not the worst thing in the world to have a quick smoke break outside, even if the child is with you. That's all - not the worst thing in the world. I wouldn't call smoking a deal breaker if the caregiver is otherwise loving and attentive. If my mother had been this strict I wouldn't have been looked after by the sweetest and most kind-hearted caregiver a child could have had - my grandmother. A pack/day (indoor!) smoker.
ReplyDeleteP.S. my screws are perfectly tightened!
ReplyDeleteUm, someone with the screen-name "maryPOPPIN'PILLS" has a problem with someone smoking cigarettes?
ReplyDeleteSure, sure, there are 1000 good explanations, it's just a joke, or whatever, but why not save the really high level ire for kids who will be potentially injured (like right now), than some second hand smoke exposure.
I think smoking is gross and disgusting. I used to smoke for years and I'm so glad I quit. I would never hire a nanny who smoked and if I found out she did around my child even if they were outside, I would be pissed because it would mean that she lied about being a non-smoker. I don't think it's a crime to smoke around a child outside, I would just not hire anyone who did. Just my personal choice, for my family. I have friends who smoke and it doesn't bother me to be around it. It doesn't make you a loser if you smoke, but it's just gross in my opinion to do it when the child is right there next to you. As for the nanny who cannot make it through the day without a cigarette, I sympathize, but I still would not hire a smoking nanny.
ReplyDeleteCNF
ReplyDeleteAs I've said before, and I'll say it again:
I DO NOT WRITE these Submissions. I only Publish them. They are sent in by other people.
Thank you!
mpp,
ReplyDeleteI am glad you cleared that up because I was getting really confused as to how you could be in so many places at once. I thought, "Damn, that chick is like freaking Hermione Granger!"
:)
I know, right? Jeesh.
ReplyDelete:)
Haha.
ReplyDeleteThat's all. Just haha.
fuck you, if you live in new york, people are going to smoke.
ReplyDeleteoh ps. stop being so fucking racist
Well as long as it wasn't pot.
ReplyDeleteAmen.
ReplyDeleteOh no. Not again! Texmex, I do hope you'll behave today. (and me, too!)
ReplyDeleteWhy, big apple nanny, ain't you sweet and sassy! a course I'll be behavin' sweet thang, don't worry your pretty little patootie, now, hear?
ReplyDeleteLord, I can't believe someone complained that the woman was smoking in front of the child. I could see if the little girl had asthma and was weezing, but that is not the case here.
ReplyDelete"I wouldn't call smoking a deal breaker if the caregiver is otherwise loving and attentive."
ReplyDelete~paperbagprincess
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it would definitely be a deal breaker for me. i wouldn't hire a nanny who smoked around my kids, even outside. i used to be a smoker and know how difficult it is to quit, but that doesn't mean it's appropriate in a caregiver.
chic noir,
ReplyDeleteI guess some of us aren't "all about the glam."
:)
"A mother reported that a babysitter "thumped" cigarette ashes on her child's head on Conn "
ReplyDeleteYep, this is what happens next.
Never hire a smoker!
Never!
Never!
Say whaaa? I don't understand the above post.
ReplyDeleteBut I think it is implying that all smoker nannies will inevitably use kids' heads as ashtrays??
heh heh, silly.
okay, when I was growing up my parents smoked around me all the time. I know thats bad and unfortunate, but there are parents who do smoke in front of their kids. Thats the sad truth. And those parents can get nannies and be okay with a nanny smoking in front of their kids.
ReplyDeleteand if they're okay with that, theres not much anyone can do.
I'm a smoker, but I'm a nanny. I would NEVER smoke around my charges, I want the best for them and care about their health more then my own.