Received Friday, October 12, 2007
I had the day off today, (10/12) and took dd to the park. A black woman of medium height and proportionate weight, medium skin tone with dark hair pieced back was in the vicinity supervising a boy of about 6. It was not immediately obvious, but it became obvious the boy was *sn. This is probably not a huge deal, but the boy pulled her hair when she was correcting him and so she pulled his hair back. He pulled her hair again and she pulled his hair, quite hard. His entire head moved to the side. And he cried out. Then he pulled her hair again and she yanked his hair one more time, even harder. He screamed out and again and also said "stop it" and he raised his his hand like he was going to hit her. She raised her hand up as if she were going to hit him and she had the meanest look on his face. At this, the boy started crying, carrying on in a disturbed way although it didn't last long. He calmed down and then he was back to normal, albeit needing quite a bit of correction from his nanny. The nanny was not unaware that I (and another caregiver) were looking at her. When I was nearer her and the little boy, she was again correcting him- the tone of which I perceived to be exhausted and angry. She met eyes with me and said, "Don't worry none, I'm doing just as his mother said". She seemed to roll her eyes back in her head as if she disagreed with that, which having observed her for the past 30 minutes, one would not think she had any hesitancy in treating the sn child so harshly. I am not saying the child did not need some correction and I don't have a SN child, so I cannot pretend to know what it was like, but the scene left me feeling for the little boy. The little boy was wearing large, thick corduroys that were rolled up at the bottom, a blue fleece that zipped to a mock turtleneck and he had brown hair that was parted very low on one side. He had fair skin, (white), had exceptionally long eyelashes although I can't recall his eye color.
*special needs
what does SN mean?
ReplyDeletespecial needs
ReplyDeleteAwwww...sad :(
ReplyDeleteplease learn to write
ReplyDelete10:04, Is it necessary to be mean for no particular reason?
ReplyDeleteHow sad. It must be hard for parents of sn kids to find good care givers. It really takes an exceptional person to have the skill and patience to meet their needs.
ReplyDeleteHello
ReplyDeleteI just read a posting on Craigslist. Thought I would share it someone looking to hire: It made me sad when I read it:
Hi,
We’re a family in xxxxx, NJ, (20 minutes by car from NY city) We have 2 children aged 6 and 5, sweet and well behaved, and they both go to school from 8:25 am to 5 pm. Nanny must have a driving license, a clean driving record , and have her own car-an absolute must. Nanny’s job is to prepare them for school in the morning to drive them there and back at 5pm, to care for them (dinner, shower, etc.) when she brings them back at 5pm and be with them ( park, library, home ) until 9pm when they go to sleep. Nanny also cooks for the children, laundry and ironing for the family, and vacuum once a week. So job is 6:30 am-9 am in the morning, and then 5pm-9 pm in the afternoon, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. Friday and Saturday are off and Sunday is a full day. On Sunday it is 6:30 am to 9:00pm . The mom is a nurse working also Sundays so Sunday is an absolute must. Nanny has her own room with TV. Job is 40 hours a week; salary: $600 a week( $15 an hour ). Job can also be part time since we may have also someone for the mornings and/or for Sundays
When do they see their kids??
ReplyDeleteCruel, selfish and irresponsible parents. I wish people like this would get a pet instead--and not a dog or cat, because even a dog or cat deserves more attenton than this. Perhaps some sort of reptile, because those don't really like to be touched or bothered--as long as their food and water are supplied they are content to be ignored forever.
ReplyDeletewhy so angry when this is how parents are they want nothing to do with their kids hire a nanny and get the worst and the kids suffer for it because parents not givintg the love and neither is the nanny
ReplyDeleteWhy are there so many mean people here? This is a great website, and hopefully it's helping parents and caregivers...but WHY do people get jumped on for spelling errors and such? I'm sure my post will be made fun of too. All I'm trying to say is when someone is reporting an incident do they need to have perfect grammar...or is the health and safety of children just a little more important?! How bout trying to be nice....maybe people would participate a little more.
ReplyDeleteI know....don't take it personal. Most people are anal, they just need a good bowel movement or to get laid.
ReplyDeleteWow, Eric's mom, that is some posting you found on Craigslist. These people don't get to see their kids. Just because they are working doesn't mean they don't evet have to see their kids. Even workaholic parents take their kids to school in the morning, then a part time nanny picks them up from school in the afternoon, helps them with homework, feeds them, and gets them ready for bed. Then the parents take over the reading/bedtime routine.
ReplyDeleteNow back to the nanny...very mean to the child. I doubt the mother actually told her than she could yank the kid's hair.
I want to know why a woman would bother to have a kid if she isn't going to raise it herself? In this day and age of easy, effective birth control, accident is no excuse.
ReplyDeleteIf mothers (and/or fathers, can't be sexist, can we?) would stay home with their kids where they belong, they wouldn't have problems with nannies.
And in case you're wondering if I practice what I preach, I do. I stayed home until my kids (now 12 & 14) were in school, then worked part time. I now teach full-time. I see them off in the morning, go to work, and get minutes after they do.
9:38. Do you really think you are the first person to pose this issue or arguement on this site? Come on, be at least a little more original. Not that I don't agree with you, at least on some, less bitter, level, but we read this stuff on every post every day. Spare us, please.
ReplyDeleteShe's (9;38) certainly not the first, or only, to have and post this opinion. There are several of us, from what I can tell.
ReplyDeleteKeep it up responsible, kid-loving moms. Somebody need to speak for these kids, because some of their parents don't seem to realize how valuable kids really are...or that they actually have feelings and needs that go beyond wanting to see their parents feeling fulfilled and happy in their own personal lives.
Well meme
ReplyDeleteWe keeping reading your same shitty responses to posters you don't like.
Go dig a hole
Hope everyone knows there are 2 "meme's" One is M-I-M-I and one is M-E-M-E...just thought I would clear that up!
ReplyDeleteWell, Meme is the likable one
ReplyDelete7:30...thanks for trying to help keep that clear. I tried to do that on another post as well.
ReplyDeleteAnd, 12:06, thank you...unless that was sarcasm! :)
Well, 6:15, I could have something to say to you but I wouldn't want to be shitty.
ReplyDeleteHave a lovely night, Princess.
No,it was sarcasm, meme, I do find you to be likable (most of the time, heh!) especially when you keep on the subject and don't allow anyone to bait you into some tawdry exchange, which is their goal.
ReplyDeletewhoops, of course I meant in the above post that "it wasn't sarcasm". Sorry about that meme!!!!!
ReplyDeleteSo the vile language posts are not the nice meme that we all like? I'm so glad, because i was also disappointed. Meme has more class than that. I like the good Meme!
ReplyDeleteFake meme, what is wrong with you? Use your own name, or go anonymous. It's pathetic to masquerade as somebody else...especially in a place where it is so easy to simply be anonymous.
Thank god for bad nannies. My wife stays home with my infant son, and gives him all the love and attention he deserves.
ReplyDeleteWhen my well-adjusted, confident son competes against your neurotic, self-doubting child; my son will wipe the floor with your kid, in academics and sports.
My wife stays at home with our children and our two nannies. Our children will wipe the floor with your kids in academics and sports. And when my wife meets your wife in public, she will wipe the floor with your neurotic, angst ridden, frenzied, shadow of a former woman.
ReplyDeleteThis is upsetting. I understand having to work....I did when my kids were in school.
ReplyDeleteNow they are gone....but I have 2 little dogs. I work close enough to go home at lunch, but sometimes I cant. I feel guilty those days...cause its too long for any creature to be alone.
You all criticize the SAHM when they go off on you...but gee whiz. I understand the financial need...as well as the level of personal satisfaction a person needs. I have great empathy for people who have to work and hire a nanny, but to not see your kids at all during a day is abuse. Where is child services when this is going on. I guess its not considered abuse to have kids and to leave them with someone else ALL of the time.
This makes it so hard for people that know how to balance to work and family, and I KNOW there are many of women out there who do it beautifully.
well said, 10:31
ReplyDeleteFor the life of me, I cannot imagine a mother that would willfully subject her special needs child to intentional distress. The child's behavior is more than suggestive of the notion that the nanny's techniques are not working.
ReplyDeleteYeah I've done the hair pulling thing and usually it stops after the first time. I have an unusual way of being a nanny but never had a complaint.
ReplyDelete