Young, Pia Zadorra, Hispanic looking nanny wearing mint green slacks, a sleeveless, button up tank blouse in tan and white tennis shoes with "peds". She was pushing a double stroller containing 2 girls dressed alike this morning (6/6) at around 10:00 A.M. One was larger than the other, but I am still assume they were dressed. The blue sun shade covered their heads but I could see should length blonde hair. The children were between two and three. Both wore dark pink shirts and blue leggings with small flowers or designs on them. The girl on my left (as I was approaching) was having a temper tantrum and writhing in the stroller. The nanny immediately parked the stroller and bent down and got in her face, shaking her bony finger in the child's face. "You're bad, bad, bad girl." Then they continued on. The same girl continued to write and through her opaque white sippy cup with a green lid out the stroller and the nanny picked it up and tossed it in to a wastebasket they were passing by. The child then went ballistic. The nanny threatened to pinch her. No, she did not pinch her-she just threatened. Nanny had a dramatically heavy accent that made her almost comical as she threatened the child. Still, I don't think calling a child bad and threatening physical abuse is in anyway okay. There was a large very plain looking, vinyl beige bag hanging off the stroller that had two large square pockets on it. After I passed them the little girl started crying "I want mommy, I want mommy" and the nanny bark sharply, "no". So it sounded like this, "I want mommy", "uhNOO", "I want mommy", "uhNOO", "I want mommy", "uhNOO".
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I guess you can't always have your mommy if your paying for that kindof "help"
ReplyDeleteI think telling a child that he/she or bad and or threatening to hurt them is kind of a cultural divide. It isn't correct in anyway and yet it is commonplace in many cultures. I don't know why people hire childcare for their children that are the sort of people they themselves would never feel comfortable or have enough in common with to spend a day with.
ReplyDeleteAnd please don't lecture me on diversity. I am so over diversity.
I don't get it either - women who are smart, educated, read up on child development and then hire someone to watch their child who thinks threats of physical violence and scaring children into submission are the ways to discipline.
ReplyDeleteI know a couple of people like this and I think it's just hear no evil, see no evil, etc. They hired the nanny for whatever reason and they just blanked out after that, assuming their kids are getting good care. But they don't seem to ask too many questions of the nanny, as would seem to be prudent.
I'll put my kid in a reputable daycare center any day over a nanny whose disciplinary tactics I am not in accord with.
It's all about accountability, IMO. If you don't hold your nanny accountable, no one will. And it seems to me that some straightforward questioning on these matters will weed out 90% of the bad nannies...most people aren't good enough liars to pretend that they know about developmentally appropriate discipline if they're still planning to act like this nanny.
I'd bet this mom never asked her nanny, what do you do when the kids are tantruming? The nanny probably would have given a vague answer. Vague answers = something you don't want the nanny to do to your kid!
6:38: I don't know why people hire childcare for their children that are the sort of people they themselves would never feel comfortable or have enough in common with to spend a day with.
ReplyDeleteyou know, i don't think i ever thought of nanny care in this way before. you make an excellent point!
:38 PM
ReplyDeleteYou make a very good point about cultural compatibility. I have encountered nannies who believe in spanking, and threatening. They don't spank their charges, because the parents don't believe in it but....they don't really know any other discipline techniques.
The children are out of control, and the nanny is angry and resentful because she thinks they are "spoiled brats", and it is the parents fault. It sounds like this may be the case with the nanny in this post.
Many parents don't bring up a discussion of discipline in interviews, especially if they have a young baby. In that case, I bring it up, because I hope to be there through the toddler and preschool years, when it will be important that we are in agreement.
A nanny
As in any job, there must be training or assurance that the nanny has the knowledge needed to handle disciplinary problems, dietary issues, schedules, etc. I think the parent doing the hiring should insist on this and make sure that their child is with someone savvy enough to know what to do and what not to do. The parents need to have some responsibility with regard to a nanny meeting certain standards.
ReplyDeleteI know a few mothers who spend more time picking out a fall handbag then they do a nanny. I just hope when these mothers are old and decripid and pissing in a bag- I hope the children apply the same principals when it comes to hiring their caregiver. YOU BAD. You VERY BAD, you pee yourself. BAD.
ReplyDeleteI would never hire anyone from another culture. I work 10 hour days.
ReplyDeleteI want as close to me as I can get. Someone who was raised in a way that is as much like they way I was as possible. Definitely an American.
What is your definition of "an American" afterall I am an american but Im sure I may not look,sound and act like you.Such narrow mindedness
ReplyDelete