Received Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Spotting #1: African American nanny of proportionate height and weight, wearing nondescript clothing in shades of blue and navy was in the park Monday during the early afternoon. She was with your baby in a McClaren blue & grey stroller with your very fair, baby of 12 months-18 months. I could not tell whether baby was a boy or a girl; but here is the disturbing thing- nanny was allowing the baby to have coffee from her cup. The nanny next to her asked her in surprise what was contained in the cup and the nanny said "iced coffee". When that nanny gave her a look, the nanny rolled her eyes and said "she's not really getting but a drop". Why? Where was her sipping cup full of water or juice?
Spotting #2: Same day, ten minutes later and I am in the sandbox with my daughter, 19 months. A little boy between 2-3 wearing a forest green t-shirt with a lion on it and light blue Gap looking jeans with elastic waist enters sandbox. The boy is playing with a very small, yellow plastic dump truck. At this point I don't know who is watching him. I am sitting a foot away from my daughter who is not doing much of anything. Nevertheless, in the next minute, the little boy pulls his pants down and pees in the sand. Sand splattering on the wood and contaminating our shared area. I looked around in disgust for anyone to recognize their child. Nothing. I picked up my dd and relocated to another spot on the playground. Sometime later, I witnessed his nanny; a very thin, African American with very high cheekbones wearing a plain white t-shirt call out to him and ask if he needed sunblock. The child said no and ran to go down the slide. Not even three and he determines when he does and does need sunblock. Impressive. Where was the nanny when Dr. Sun was having his pee party in my corner of the sandbox? I'm asking because I didn't see her at all then.
I've seen caregivers and parents give coffee to little kids. I don't get it. Last week I saw a dad give coke in a can to his 18 month or so child. i didn't watch to see if he peed in the sand after that... Busy day at that park, eh?
ReplyDeleteRegarding your first siting...ARE YOU SERIOUS? Honey get over it! You've never let your child sip from your glass whether it be coffee or any iced drink! I have to say I agree with the nanny, the child is only getting but a drop. I know I've let my children sip from it on occasion! They are neither addicted to coffee nor do I believe it will affect their mental abilities in the future! Thanks for the good laugh! The second spotting was definitely something to comment on, very sad that the child was not being watched and was allowed to pee in a public playground! Why didn't you approach the nanny and inform her of what the child had done? Don't you think you are as much to blame now as that child and nanny for remaining silent?
ReplyDeleteThe terms pee party and Mr. Sun made me laugh!
ReplyDelete9:26 has it occurred to you that some of us don't want our children eating/drinking from the same dishes/cups as an adult (including ourselves), regardless of what drink is in there or how much they're getting?
ReplyDeleteI agree with 9:26, drinking from the same cup is a health issue. Some cultures give kids milky coffee.
ReplyDeleteAs for peeing in the sand box, horrible. I wish you had told the nanny. Maybe she would watch him in the sand box next time.
1:43 you are uptight, I feel sorry for your kids. The first part of the post is a little too busy body for me, get over it the child was not harmed. The second one I can understand posting, I don't think children should be peeing in public and especially not in a sand box where another child is playing.
ReplyDeleteIf it is not the mother choosing to share her drink out of the same straw--especially a caffeniated drink--then I think it is a worthy post. A nanny shouldn't get to decide who shares germs with the child or if they have caffeine or not. That is a mother's job, so it can't hurt to post about it. Maybe the mother knows, maybe she doesn't. But if she reads this and SHE doesn't agree, she can stop it. If she reads this and doesn't have a problem with it, then no harm is done.
ReplyDeleteMy biggest challenge for myself lately is not asking questions of a three year old when I know I should be telling him what we are doing. That way he can't say "NO". Lol. The nanny "asking" about the sunblock is ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteI've never liked the idea of sandboxes unless they were in someone's private backyard and covered. Otherwise every animal in the area knows where the toilet is... including kids. Yuck.
And kids love to have whatever their adults are drinking, so I occasionally give my nephew some iced coffee from my cup. At least relatives can delude themselves with the "family germs" theory. But we all get germs from everyone all over, so I'm not going to stress over it too much. It's inevitable. There's no way to avoid a child catching germs and viruses.
1:43....you wouldn't let your OWN CHILDREN drink from your cup or eat from your plate??? Can you say, ANAL RETENTIVE??? Wow would it suck to work for you!!!
ReplyDeleteSo sue me -- I don't like my children swapping spit/dental bacteria with adults. It's not hygeinic. What do you care what I like or don't like?
ReplyDeleteI would normally disagree with anal mama, however I nearly passed out when my nanny of 6 months opened her mouth wide while I was looking at her. She had black rot in the back of her mouth. Stubs of teeth. I had serious nightmares for weeks after seeing that sight. Very scary.
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh. I love the pee party remark!!
ReplyDeleteI have let my daughter play with my empty soda bottle - so I am guilty too. She might have even got a drop out it. It is different if I give it to her though. I would be mad if my nanny was giving her soda/coffee.
Exactly. I guess all those calling me anal have no problem serving their child a cup of juice with the residue of tooth rot swirled in it. I do.
ReplyDelete334 and 849, sharing utensils, cups or even mouth kisses is unhealthy. Saliva carries the bacteria in ones mouth. Studies are finding that children are introduced to these bacteria, not all good, by open mouth kisses and shared utensils. They may cause future problems with the children, and pass on mouth diseases, like gingivitis. Read it up on the net, the info is out there. This has been in articles in Parent/Parenting. My sister is a dentist, and she too warns not to take bites of babies food with the same utensil.
ReplyDeleteI do agree that it should be up to the parents if their children have caffine or not, but the little amount the child posted here recieved is not enough to worry about. The shared saliva is.
My own MIL will not stop kissing my child on the mouth, and she has horrible teeth, lots of cavities, and gingivitis. I've given her the article to read, restated to my child to kiss her on the cheek in front of her, and even outright said not to do it. Gross. At least I can make sure my child flosses and brushes every day to counter the germs.
Good Post, roxy. Also, what about herpes? Some of these nanny skanks sound like they could spread disease fairly easily. I'm not saying this nanny was a skank but I wouldn't want a babysitter or nanny sharing a drink with my child. One never knows.
ReplyDeleteI think my heart stopped a little when I read the comment about the nanny's rotten mouth. GAHHHHHH
ReplyDeleteAnd I have thought about babies getting herpes from kisses on the mouth and skin of the face, etc. I also think about ME getting herpes after kissing a tainted baby. All those long goodnight kiss lines the kids have to go through at the end of family parties, on and on. I have finally just accepted the fact that we are all covered in germs all the time, although I fight against it as much as possible (washing hands and face constantly).
To the Dentist poster, thanks for mentioning the harmful mouth bacteria. So gross that the MIL won't respect the healthful suggestions of a mom who knows. So much info is coming out about links between these oral bacteria and heart disease, etc. And that kind of transmission is preventable. Thanks.
Ohh, thanks JMT. I forgot about the link between mouth disease and heart disease. And the thought of herpes!!! Yikes!!
ReplyDeletePeople, this is not urban legend. Scientists are learning so much about our human bodies, and personally, I want my children to live to be healthy and old.
Really you moms need to get over it! I hope then that you don't kiss your kids with your filthy mouths either! Or do you think your mouths are completely devoid of GERMS? God only knows what you are passing on to your own children....you think your mouths are so CLEAN? I agree I would not like to work for people like you!
ReplyDelete8:08, now worries. I would not like you to work for me either if you can't comprehend the simple of concept of not swapping spit with a child.
ReplyDeleteWe had the sweetest nanny from Utah for 2 years. She always hugged and kissed our children. Pretend bit their fingers, gave them raspberries on their stomache. After she worked for us for about 6 months, we got close and she would start to share with me her after hours activities. This consisted more or less of servicing every Tom, Dick and Harry within a five mile radius of our house up to and including BOTH of our garbage men. As this was revealed to me, I did not judge her as I was young once but I did cringe everytime she kissed the kids!
ReplyDelete1131...I'm sending you a HUGE roll of the eyes and shake of the head! Swapping spit? DO all of you frequently SPIT INTO YOUR DRINKS? Dirty dirty mother you are if that's what you do! I have no problem giving my son a drink from my cup or food from my plate! Unless of course I'VE JUST SPIT IN THE BLOODY CUP/PLATE!!! WHICH IS HIGHLY UNLIKELY!!
ReplyDeletetooth rot residue smoothie? OMG, the thought!
ReplyDeleteI just want to know what kind of mother takes her kids to the park just so she can spy on bad nannies.
ReplyDeletepipe down, 1145.
ReplyDeleteBad nannies are the perils of any park. Like pigeon droppins.
Mika, Mika, Mika -- why are you having such a hard time understanding that when you share cups and utensils you are necessarily sharing saliva? It doesn't take gallons of spit to do damage -- bacteria are microscopic. Get it?
ReplyDeleteThis time we were fortunate because there are some pretty serious water-borne toxins around. So how do they get into water bottles?
ReplyDelete"Probably from cells in the mouth which dislodge quite easily, saliva. Also if you've been eating and some of the food gets back into the bottle the bugs can feed on that,"
I'm sure busy today...The Superhero is back again...*LOL*
ReplyDeleteWhoever said parent's can pass herpes to the child via mouth is right. When my best friend and I worked in daycare, one of the two-year-olds had unidentifiable sores in her mouth. The admitted she got herpes from some guy orally and passed it to her daughter. Do I think parents should allow their children to eat/drink from plates/untensils/cups the parent is drinking/eating from? No, because it teaches the child that they can eat/drink off someone else's plate/cup/untensil. I don't think the OP is crazy, she's stating an opinion.
Personally I can't stand parents who allow their little kids coffee. Just how I feel. I think it's stupid. The last mother I nannied for used to let her little girl have her iced coffee (the kid was only 1) and this mother was a friggin idiot.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the pee, ewwww. gross.
mika, when you eat off of a utensil or drink from a cup, you leave residue from you mouth. It's called saliva, or spit. Do some research on the net if you don't think what you are doing is wrong. You can pass on mouth disease, which can lead to heart disease. You can pass on herpes. You can pass on colds or the flu, even if you don't have it, per say, but may be carring the germs. Why do that to a child?
ReplyDeleteMy children mean the world to me, and I want to keep them safe, and teach them correctly. If you have a no share policy, they are more likly not to swap cans of soda with friends when you're not around. Teach them young, and teach them right.
With so many of our youth being promiscuious these days, a shared can of soda could lead to a lifetime sentence of herpes.
what about decaf coffee?
ReplyDeleteI AM A NANY AND IT HURTS ME TO SEE AND HEAR HOW BAD THE PARENTS TALK ABOUT THEIR NANNIES.WE LEAVE OUR HOMES AND SACRIFICE TO TAKE CARE OF THESE KIDS WHO DISRESPECT S,CALL US NAMES,KICK US,ALSO PARENTS ARE NOT CLEAN,WE PICK UP AFTER THEM,EVEN THEIR FILTHY UNDERGARMENTS AND THATS WHAT WE GET.IF ALL NANNIES DECIDE TO STAY HOME HOPE THEY GET SOMEONE TO DO IT FOR THEM.
ReplyDeleteI am an employer of a nanny and if she had reason to address me in an email and did so in ALL caps; she would be F I R E D.
ReplyDeleteTake it down a notch. Get some mental help. And don't ever use the term "disrespect" unless you are starring in a rap video.
I cannot imagine your employer is satisfied with Y O U.
The nanny was not addressing you. She was voicing her own opinion (to which she is entitled within this forum). The Colonial days have long since come and gone. Get down of your high horse and realize the fact that nannies are human beings with feelings too, Massa.
ReplyDelete1259 -- if life as a nanny is so miserable you should get another job. Why sit around complaining about it? Why not do something about it like getting another job? Please explain.
ReplyDelete1:04 You need to get a life and get out of the dark ages. You would fire a nanny because she sent you an email in caps. YOU ARE SUCH A BITCH. How does that nanny stand to work for you. I imagine you are a terrible person to work for.
ReplyDeletenp-it's kust piss poor etiquette
ReplyDeleteAre you for real? Seriously, I think you need to pipe down. Don't be such a b*#@h yourself. The mom was stating her own opinion, "to which she is entitled within this forum," in your own words. So moms can't state their opinions without nannies crying foul? But the nannies can come on here and say what they want? Whatever. Next!
ReplyDelete1255, pipe it down. A mom can fire her nanny for whatever reason she wants to, as any nanny can quit for whatever reason she wants to.
ReplyDeletePersonally, all caps is rude. An e-mail sent to me in that form would not win me over. If my nanny should do so, she would not be around for long. My family sets high standards for how we treat those we know, and I would be pissed to be "spoken" to like that.
1259, get a new job. You sound bitter, and should not be around children with all that rage.
ReplyDeletesomebody was a busy little elf between 232-237 AM.
ReplyDeleteand jmt,
is that decaf coffee?
Usually. Although the first time the Nephew asked for "some sips" of my coffee it was Caf. I realized shortly thereafter that I was an idiot because he was about to take his nap. Ha ha ha. But he wasn't outwardly affected by it at all and slept well. Since then I drink decaf for my own health anyway.
ReplyDeleteCheers!
but, jmt, you aren't that old, are you?
ReplyDeleteNot that old that what?
ReplyDeleteCaffeine makes me jittery.
605, the elf is just telling it like it is....
ReplyDelete