Received Thursday, September 28, 2006
Whatever you do, do not hire a baby nurse named Joyce who comes from Guyana but prides herself as being British. She says she has a husband Charlie who is English or Irish but lives in London. She told me she is a certified mid-wife in England and works either in London or the NYC area. She worked for me for about 3 weeks and there was something "off" with her from the start. I had seen her work previously in my building and since she had references I hired her to take care of my newborn daughter. Joyce is a drinker and drank my husband's single malt whiskey continuously. She was constantly telling me to leave the house (with the baby) to take a walk, run errands etc., even though I had just give birth and didn't feel like much walking. Whenever I came back, she was always acting strange,talking to herself, being very bossy and simply weird. I spoke to her previous employer and she said that she had also experienced this type of behavior from her and that she just thought she was a strange character. This encouraged me to keep her although my first instinct was to get this woman out of my house. Her behavior continued and my suspicions grew. My husband also thought I was emotional, had the baby blues etc. Finally, he decided to mark one of his scotch bottles to calm me down. Sure enough, the next day when I insisted this woman was drinking (because I could smell her breath) and we were ready to fire her, he pulled out the marked bottle which showed the whiskey was much lower that the previous day. Thankfully, nothing happened to my baby but the thought of this woman drinking while caring for someone else's newborn has tormented me. I hope prospective employers of Joyce read this and think twice before bringing her to your home. BTW, I spoke to the woman who recommended her to me and she did say she had an incident with beer around Joyce that now that I mentioned this to her, seemed odd. Hope this helps someone.
The person described sounds like the baby nurse I hired in July 2006 to care for my newborn. However, I never had any reason to believe that she was drinking on the job or any danger to my son. In fact, I had a wonderful 2 week experience with this nurse. The only explaination I can think of for the difference in opinion, is that we are talking about two completely different people.
ReplyDeleteThis is not meant to be mean, but more like a "Wake Up" call.
ReplyDeleteRead on!
Unfortunately, this is what happens when you hire so called "Baby Nurses" based on the simple fact is, you are to cheap to pay a top trained professional Baby Nurse. You parents complain, after putting your child in danger, because you put a price tag on the care of your child. If you can't afford to pay for a quality Baby Nurse, well "Mothers" I guess you just better do what real "Moms" have been doing for centuries now, that is taking care of your own children. Stop complaining after you keep these fake baby nurses on for 3 weeks or more, it's old news now, you know the drill. You think, by hiring a island woman or another illegal foreigner, you could slack on the pay. News flash a Professional Baby Nurse rate is not $ 150.00 per day or less. It is a specialized service with a high rate at least a minimum of $250.00 per day or more. I feel bad for your children. Mommy will spend more on her shoes than on the care I receive. Sad simply sad.
I completely resent the "wake up call" posting. There are many reasons why someone would hire a baby nurse. Many "real" moms that have been raising children for centuries live near relatives who can help them. Maybe someone had a particularly difficult delivery and was bedridden or sick for any number of reasons. And how do you know that they skimped on the baby nurse? And furthermore, an "island woman" can be as professional as anyone else, given the fact that "island women" too have been having babies for centuries. It's not sad that people need to hire baby nurses. It's sad that people like you rush to judgement.
ReplyDeleteI think your "wake up" call posting is completely offensive. How dare you think they are too cheap to pay for a trained nurse? How do you know she wasn't a trained nurse? There are people in all walks of life who have alcohol problems--including nurses--if this woman was indeed drinking on the job. And do you really think "real moms" have been raising children (in particular newborns) on their own for centuries? In the past and in less mobile cultures, new moms were surrounded by family members who could lend a hand. But now, many of us live far away from our families and need to hire help for many reasons. Illness? Multiple children in the household? Simple lack of knowledge b/c they are our first children? And how dare you think that simply b/c she is "an island woman" she is illegal, unprofessional, and/or getting less pay? You should not feel bad for their children, you should feel sad for your own if you are teaching them intolerance.
ReplyDeleteagain, i think you all are missing the point. a real baby nurse has credentials. not a mimeograph of a ten question true or false test. If you can afford a baby nurse, you can afford a REAL one. Just like nannies. Just like the old addage, if you can afford to go out for dinner, you damn sure can afford to tip
ReplyDeleteI happen to know whom she is talking about, and the woman is listed with a highly regarded nanny agency, even though the original poster got her without going through the agency.
ReplyDeleteIn most states it is acutally illegal to call yourself a baby nurse unless you are an actual liscenced nurse.
ReplyDeleteThe nanny industry learned of this las recently when several "baby nurses" were forced to change their title or risk being arrested for a felony...
I can only comment about my experience with her while in my home. Her problem was neither that she wasn't qualified nor that she was an illegal. Her problem, and the reason I shared this with others, is that she drank while in my house, taking care of my newborn. That is unacceptable and I hope she never does this to anyone again. I am very fortunate that nothing happened to my baby while in her care.
ReplyDeleteWhat I learned from this experience is to be very thorough when hiring someone (to speak to more than 1 reference), to be true to my maternal instict and to keep an eye on my child and whoever I hire to take care of her in the future.
I understand the Mom's anxiety but I happen to know Joyce and she is indeed an excellent baby nurse. She was actually correct in suggesting that you go walking a bit after the baby. If Mom recognized that Joyce was inbibing enough to cause her alarm she should have terminated her services immediately. The wake up caller's comments are truly offensive but ignorance is a curse.
ReplyDeleteThe only baby nurse I would hire would be one my doctor recommended. After I gave birth, the nurses informed me that my health insurance covered one week's visits by a baby nurse. I declined, since my family was helping me. If I didn't have help, I would have wanted it. However just hiring a stranger is really stupid. I agree that it should have been a wake up call to the woman. Never hire a baby nurse unless your doctor or health insurance can back them up!
ReplyDeleteFor God's sake people, it's true you mothers need to wake the F up!!!
it's a very helpful article, In my opinion, every mom wanna-be should understand that being pregnant is a miracle, so they will take care their body with a great love and understanding.
ReplyDelete