Received Friday, January 28, 2011
I am new to being a career nanny. I have found a gig being an after school nanny three days a week. We agreed I get there at 3:30 to pick up the dog and pick up the first son at the bus stop at 3:00 and get the 2nd son at 330 and she said I will be there until the db gets home at 6:30ish and we agreed on (15 an hour) 150 a week guaranteed (and days off when the college is closed because mb is going back to school) which is fine - I was originally looking for a full time nanny position but I love the family and the kids but lately it just seems that mb is not good at giving directions.
I went there once for mb to show me the school bus drops off and then I jumped in to working. Day 1) They live in an apartment and the owners live down stairs and I was told to keep everything quiet and not to disturb them downstairs and the dog wouldn't stop barking so I had to lock the dog in the crate (as directed by the older daughter - who I think is perfectly capable of watching her two brothers) but who am to say that? I have a job anyways I hated doing that it didn't feel right. I was also unaware of the state coming to work with the daughter for the fact that the daughter had mild special needs until a stranger knocked at the door I was also un aware that they were going out of the house. It was also getting close to dinner time and the family is organic and 2 out of the 6 members of the family are vegetarians (I am organic and my mom and sister are vegetarians). I remember during the interview touching base about that but I was unaware of the family eating together so I made the children some food based off of their diatery restrictions - because it was dinner time and they were hungry. All was good I thought and the children ate. Dad boss came home freaking out on me saying it was very important to eat dinner as a family.
The second day the mom texted me saying she left me a note with directions when I got home - I looked and I couldn't find it so I texted her to text me what the note said and she said to ask her daughter to help me it was missing in action. She seemed to get mad. Whatever.... the third day I mentioned when pay day was (I called her in the morning) she said I could get paid every week which was fine, she wrote me a check that bounced which i didn't know at the time I cashed it (this was Friday.) I got a text from her 4 days after that saying it was from a bad account and that she was sorry. I rushed to my bank and they closed out my account. X_x However she did give me cash the next time I went over there.
The next day at work she wanted me to cook dinner with the kids, then she mentioned to help with laundry and look for a book for the daughter to do a project - I am sorry but I am here to watch and help the boys (or so I thought to myself. I didn't say anything and spent a good 45 minutes looking). Is it just me or is this position getting difficult, or the mb isnt good with directions. Also I agreed on 10 hours a week with 15 an hour guaranteed but I am there from 3-6:30/7ish, isn't that 20 hours... Should I complain. I love the family I just don't know if they are pulling one on me.
I'm sorry, but I've read this post several times and I'm just having a very difficult time understanding it and the problem. My advice...if you are feeling taken advantage of or doing things that are not in your job description, talk to MB about what exactly is expected of you. Probably should have done that before taking the job, but it won't get any better unless you clarify things.
ReplyDeletePerhaps your story could be a little more unclear... Oh wait.. It can't.
ReplyDeleteSince I feel like 90% of the time reading this I have no clue what you're talking about, I don't know what to recommend, other then maybe getting some direction before you work and not try to get your bosses to text you your work details.
If you didn't get a work agreement set up before starting, you need to do so ASAP. It sounds as if you and MB/Db have very different expectations of what the job is supposed to entail, and without clarifying things you will only get more frustrated and so will they.
ReplyDeleteI also think if your check bounces again, you need to quit on the spot. Once is a warning sign, twice is a flashing red light and an alarm saying you are going to gey gypped.
HTH, and good luck!
I also could not understand this post. I read it about five times, still makes no sense and I now have a headache.
ReplyDeleteYes I agree to talk to the mom, say there are things you are unclear about.
ReplyDeleteAs for the watching the boys/being asked to do stuff w/the girl I think you should say that you will help them out whenever possible with stuff w/the daughter, but your job is to watch the boys so the contracted job comes first.
I just got out of a situation like this and I'm soooo glad. I had no contract and was verbally told I did not have to do any cleaning. less than 6 months later mb/db took a day off work, took the kids and I was stuck with a list of detailed cleaning of the whole house. efff that!
LOL @ "I am organic".
ReplyDeleteOK, your second sentence says you are working 3 days a week from 3-6:30, then your second to last sentence implies you are there 5 days a week for closer to 20 hours. Then you say you arrive at 3:30 and pick up the first kid at 3? It sounds like you are the one who is confused. And you say the girl should be also able to watch her brothers but then say she has special needs? Sorry, but I think you are the confused one. I don't see any 'fast one' being pulled - is this your first job as a career nanny?
ReplyDeletePlease remove post and send back to op for editing and clarification.
ReplyDeleteOP here- anonymous really? I appreciate you standing up for me but you don't have to be an asshole about it to everyone here
ReplyDeletei would like to thank the OP for her contribution which makes this site more interesting
ReplyDeleteyep - you've got alot to put up with there and you will just have to decide if putting up with it is worth the money - it has been established on this blog that it's actually not too easy to find a situation where all the people are honest.
The money situation is very disturbing
a part of it that stands out is the father's mean reaction to you doing your job
i had an incident with an awesome kid - he was forbidden to watch tv. at all. and i did not know that.
There was a very small black and white tv in the kitchen - smart little minx - he knew he could get me to turn it on when he was eating supper in the kitchen - he could not talk yet but charmingly kept pointing to the tv - well sure i turned it on. The mom and dad came home, he had been watching it for 5 minutes - and the dad - a high powered lawyer made me feel like i had committed a crime against his son.
The young boy was VERY intelligent and it obviously bothered him that the forbidden object is right in front of him all the time.
But - things like this kept happening - an angry reaction for things i was not informed about - and they loved me! and the kid loved me!
I bided my time, got out of there and did not give the real reason when i quit. Of course heard later thru the grapevine other nannies went thru the same thing
Not trying to be rude, but based on the post, it seems there are communication problems on BOTH sides (ie, half the people here cannot understand what you're talking about).
ReplyDeleteIf they have 4 kids and a mom who is going back to school, I would expect the household to be a little chaotic. Sometimes in large families you kind of have to help out where needed, because everything's a whirlwind. That doesn't mean you have to be taken advantage of though. A work agreement is a good idea. Clarifying your hours is a good idea. It might even help to just ask the mom the day before (or day of) to "go over the afternoon schedule" so that she can let you know what the dinner plans are, who might be coming by, or what she would like to have done during your time there.
The check bouncing is a definite red flag, but it could have been an honest mistake (some people do online banking and harldy write checks anymore). Ask to be paid in cash, and make sure you keep track of your hours to ensure you are being paid fairly.
OP, the only question I saw you presenting was "Should I complain?" Uh...no? You should never complain to a boss because they can kick you out on your rear. You can, however, express concerns to them in a rational manner. You have got to work on your communication skills, if your post is any indication of how you speak to people. You said you are new to the nanny biz, but you sound like you're new to working in general.
ReplyDeleteThey closed out your account? I don't understand why. Normally when a check bounces, they charge you a fee. Not close out your account.
ReplyDeleteIf you are "new" you are NOT a "career nanny". Sorry, babe-you just haven't earned it yet.
ReplyDelete