Friday

Busy Employer Wants Nanny to Write her Own Letter of Recommendation

Received Friday, February 13, 2009
Perspective and Opinion on ISYN The family I work for knows that I will be leaving in June. The mother said she is far too busy to write me a reference letter. She has instructed me to write my own, and she will just sign it. HELP!! How does someone write their own letter of reference?? In case someone would like to help me, by the time I leave, I will have been there about 2 years. I had sole charge of the child (one girl, with all the usual nanny duties including academic tuturing in a foreign language) I just do not know what to write!!! Thanks to all who take the time to respond!
Oh, I forgot to add that I am very close to the little girl, and have a good working relationship with her parents!

18 comments:

  1. I'm sorry, your boss doesn't have the time?!!! She has until JUNE!!!
    What a bytch!

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  2. Your boss sounds like a real gem!
    I would be glad to help you, If JD or MPP will send you my e-mail. Send me all your info. I will write a sample that you can tweek. You shouldn't feel uncomforable about writing it yourself, if your boss wants to make any changes or additions before she signs it, she can do so.

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  3. If both Parties agree, I don't mind sending Manhattan Nanny's e-mail to you, OP.

    Manhattan Nanny, you can Meebo me your e-mail, that way it will remain private.

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  4. Marypoppin' pills, I am the OP. I definently do not mind if Manhattan Nanny would like to help!! Thank you very much, MN!!! It's just awkward when writing about oneself...lol

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  5. A goddess among nannies, a paragon of virtue, a champion of truth.

    Go wild with it. :D

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  6. i had to do this for my husband's visa... my employer had to fill out some forms to prove my employment - but of course she never had the time.

    i'm glad MN is helping you out - its never easy writing about yourself like this.

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  7. All Eyes Said...

    "A goddess among nannies, a paragon of virtue, a champion of truth.

    Go wild with it. :D"

    Had me laughing for the past hour!!!!


    Mom has 'til June and can't find the time? Mom doesn't want to find the time. Great way to show some respect..NOT!

    I'm glad you've got some of the nannies to give you a hand because I wouldn't know where to begin.

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  8. Swiss Nanny, I just remembered you sent your Question through MEEBO. I don't have your E-mail.

    Send me your E-mail through Meebo, then I can forward it to Manhattan Nanny.
    :)

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  9. unfortunately thats kind of the standard..and not as unusual as it should be..

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  10. yea, this happened to me too. i felt that it was awkward. my boss said i should draft one up and email it to her. people are so lazy these days. what ever happened to the old fashioned way of taking time to do things that really make a difference in someone's life?

    also now a days a lot of people i have worked for that allow me to use them as a reference refuse to give out their phone number but just a short few sentences confirming i worked for them.

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  11. chesapeake: "refuse to give out their phone number"

    I wouldn't work for anyone who wouldn't allow me to give out their phone number. That is nonsense.

    In return I'm sure to give out the number only when need be, after an interview. I won't interview for anyone demanding them prior.

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  12. Sadly, this is common in a lot of the working world. :(

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  13. I agree that it is pretty common to be asked to write your own letter of rec. In college, med school and residency I had more than one person make the same request. And, when I was a junior resident, it was common to have us write the med student letters so the supervising MD could sign it. Of course it's a pain to write your own letter, but it has its advantages and I've never once had someone change a single thing.

    I do not know what your boss does for a living, but if she has been through a lot of schooling and/or supervises folks for her job she may simply be used to this system. I wouldn't take it personally and would just look at it as an opportunity to present yourself honestly and positively.

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  14. Hey swiss, I was just wondering if you were still around.... writing your own letter is very common in the business world, usually it is your performance report, and it gives you the opportunity to talk up your good points. It allows you to focus on the parts of your resume that you want future employers to know about yourself. I don't think it is lazy, I think it is very generous to be allowed to cover the points you want to cover. Look at the big picture of what this rec. can say and do for you then write away...

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  15. This just rubs me the wrong way. I feel if she does not have time then just maybe she does not value the nanny profession. She has plenty of time to write the letter but she is choosing not to at this time.

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  16. i would do a google search on sample recommendation letters. i bet you could take your time and write something really nice and professional. make sure you make yourself sound rad.

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  17. I don't think that's a big deal. I am a very supervisor, and I advise my interns the same...

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  18. see, i can't even post a grammatically correct post! seriously, i'm sure the boss does want to help you, and know if you leave it to her it won't get done.

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