I have a nanny sighting. This took place in Cypress, TX at the Cochran's Crossing playground/park/community center. I am a nanny for a 2 1/2yr old and a 1 1/2yr old. This morning at approximately 10am, a nanny arrived at the park with her triplet charges in a triple runabout stroller. The stroller had what looked like homemade cushions in each seat. I am guessing the boys were 3yrs old. They all 3 had different haircuts, but each style was a longish cut. One boy had curly hair, one very straight hair, and the other wavy hair. I didn't catch any of their names. They all had on green sweatshirts with the same design (I can't remember the design).The nanny had a medium dark complexion. I am guessing she was mexican. The nanny arrived and let all 3 boys out of the stroller. She then proceeded to sit at a picnic table and stare into space as the boys entertained themselves. I didn't see anything wrong at this point. The boys were old enough to manuever the playground equipment on their own without help, and given they were triplets they played with each other. What I had a problem with, was her lack of supervision once her nanny friends arrived at the park as well. 2 nannies arrived very shortly after she had. Each nanny had a double stroller. One nanny's charges were under a year old and stayed in the stroller. The other nanny's were about 2 and under 1. The 2yr old was allowed out to play. Then all of these nannies sat at the previously mentioned picnic table chatting and not even looking over at the playground but once every few minutes. Given my charge's ages, I was following them everywhere they went and helping them, so my eyes weren't on the other kids or nannies constantly.
A Dad arrived at the park with his approximately 4yr old daughter. He was following her around engaging her. His daughter was playing on the same play structure as one of the triplet boys. This triplet tripped climbing the structure. I didn't see the fall, so I don't know what it is he hurt. The Dad of the girl said aloud as to attract the attention of who the boy belonged to "Uh-Oh, are you okay buddy?". He looked around at everyone trying to find his caregiver. I pointed over at his nanny and said "The one in the blue shirt." He had to yell to her for her to hear, that's how far away she was. He told her the little boy fell. She just stared at him for what seemed like at least 20 seconds. Then I guess it clicked in her head or something, and she got up and walked over to the play structure. She tried to get the boy to get up and come to her from the ground, but he wouldn't get up (btw he wasn't crying anymore). So she huffed and grumbled as she had to climb the structure to get him. She again tried to coax him into getting up on his own, but he wouldn't. So she jerked him up and got off of the structure. She walked over to the picnic table, plopped him into the runabout stroller, and then sat back down and continued chatting with the other nannies. The boy sat there for a while not saying or doing anthing. Then one of his brothers came and handed him a toy spaceship, and the boy got down. The nanny didn't notice.
At this point I was getting my charges and their things together to go home for lunch. It was 10:40am. The Dad and his daughter left while I was putting my charges in the car. When I pulled away, all 3 nannies and the 3 babies were still sitting at the picnic table, and the triplets and 2yr old boy were all on their own on the playground. I have been a nanny for 5 1/2 years, and have never even seen someone who I thought was a nanny. Maybe I just never worked in the right areas or went to the right parks. I just started this nanny position yesterday so this was my first time at this park. I've read ISYN for about a year now, and thought it was "funny" that my very first nanny sighting would have to be what ISYN has deemed a "park bench nanny".
I had never seen a "park bench" nanny in 2 years of working as a nanny. Then I went to Douglas Park in Santa Monica and saw nothing but. I think the park bench nannies stay away from the parks where their employer's friends are likely to be.
ReplyDeleteokay, so what the heck is wrong with sitting on a bench? as long as its close to the park, I don't see the problem. These triplets had eachother to play with and kids fall all the time. When I bring my charges to the park, I'll play with them if they want me to, otherwise the two boys I nanny for play with eachother and love to do that. I think its healthy to have interaction with kids without an adult playing too. As long as the adult on the bench is attentive and will be there if someone were to get hurt, sitting on a bench is okay. if they are too young or the bench is out of earshot, like in this case, not okay.
ReplyDeleteThis is my comment,
ReplyDeleteAre you kidding? Have you not been reading this blog??! EVERYTHING is wrong with sitting, that is what this blog is about. It's "I saw your nanny sitting." It's child abuse according to these people. A mother would NEVER sit at the park, so it's important to report these terrible nannies who got their charges ready and took them all the way to the park just so they could sit. I mean, this child fell because his nanny should have been hovering underneath him while he climbed the monkey bars waiting to catch him.
To this is my comment:
ReplyDeletesounds like you aren't doing your job then.
This Is My Comment...There is a lot wrong with sitting when a child falls and yes they do fall all the time. When one of my charges fall, I immediately go to them (They are all over 6 years old so no need for me to hover) Check them out using my first aid training and report the incident to the parents including where and how far they fell and what they may have hit. I am able to provide this information because I may not hover over them I do watch them at all times.
ReplyDeleteHowever Sarah, I must respectfully disagree with your comment that mothers never sit. In my experience, many mothers sit, chat, talk on cell phones endlessly and otherwise ignore their children.
Oh and before anyone comments that I can't possibly be a good nanny as I am on here blogging, I nanny in the afternoon into the evening. :D
ReplyDeleteMetronanny,
ReplyDeleteI was just being sarcastic when I said those things. Nannies, moms, dads and everyone else working with children can get worn out. Sitting is not a crime anywhere but this blog.
Oops, sorry Sarah, you know what they say sarcasm is often lost on the net! My bad I apologize.
ReplyDeleteOh I know it. I think we bicker on here more than necessary just because it's sometimes impossible to read someone tone in a post.
ReplyDeleteLOL--- I thought you were serious too, Sarah. Then, I re-read it as sarcastic.. pretty funny! Anyhow, back to the original post... Yes, while I agree, sitting ALL play period is crappy, having some play time alone is actually pivotal for a child's social skills and development-- not to mention survival. Now, I am a nanny (although they are like my own), and as my name implies, I love those girls. MORE THAN ANYTHING, but when we go to the park, museum, whereever, there are times when I will sit and watch them play. I'll encourage from a far and make sure I am there in case of owies... but I am not hovering under/over/ near them the whole time. It is not good for them to be soley dependant on ONE person. Be it a mom, dad, aunt, uncle, grandma... you get the picture. So, really being a part time park bench nanny is not abuse, nor lazy. It is psychologically sound.
ReplyDeleteYes, I had many happy afternoons sitting at the park watching my kids play too...but NOT when I had a baby trapped in a stroller! babies like to play too...and you have to stand right by them or they eat everything on the ground, get trampled by the bigger kids, and climb up and fall off of things. Also, they are unable to use the swings unassisted.
ReplyDeleteIf these kids had all been three years old, I would not think that this was a bad nanny siting. But the babies stuck in the strollers all afternoon say to me that it is a bad nanny siting indeed!
To be completly honest. I always sit at the park... when the parks were once safe enough to go that is.
ReplyDeleteI always sat while my kid and my little cousin played. The problem I have is that she didn't seem concerned that this little boy fell. When I would sit and relax in the shade, because to be honest my Irish background prohibits me from spending too much time in the sun even with layers of sunscreen, I would always keep an eye on them. and if they fell I ran over to them to offer comfort. Or if they needed help or looked lost or bored I would get up.
i see nothing wrong with sitting on a bench in the park talking to friends. Children will fall and accidents will happen on play grounds. She just needed to make sure that she was paying a little bit more attention, and perhaps offered some sort of comfort instead of yanking him up and plopping him back in the stroller. Other than that she did ok.
It depends on the age and the structure, of course. Now that my charge is older, I give her more freedom on structures but there area couple of things I spot her on because of a development issue. She does like me to engage with her at the park even if she's brought a friend, so if I'm not on the structure with her, she calls for me to join her on the slide.
ReplyDeleteMost mothers are extremely neglectful at the park but then it's their own child, they can do what they want. I'm a nanny, it's not my child and I would feel forever guilty if mine got hurt because I was being neglectful by being on my phone or chatting with another mother.
SHEEIT...thank God I'm not paid to raise my son b/c I would be fired!!!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous said...
ReplyDeleteTo Dt
You say you have never seen a "park bench" nanny- unfortunately there is more nannies like that then you know.
Parents please those unexpected visits- ask where nanny and child are going. Please be involved.
5:43 PM
RE-POST FOR ANONYMOUS!!
YOU FORGOT YOUR MONIKER!!
Yes, I think it can be said there are Moms who do the same thing. I was at a park five years ago when a 2 year old, whose mother was talking away on a bench, didn't notice her daughter in danger. The girl walked across the playground, across a soccer field, to the edge of a road, and was finally seen by another mother. She stood by the edge as huge trucks from a nearby construction site were bearing down. Yikes! The point is, there is sitting on a bench watching attentively, and there is sitting on a bench far away, paying no attention. Good caregivers should know the difference.
ReplyDeleteNVmom, that's it exactly.
ReplyDeleteYes, I sat. I am a mom of twins and I was tired, and I gravitated to every park bench I could find. But I loved my dds more than anything and so I watched them like a hawk and when they fell, when they got hurt, when they needed pushing, when they needed a boost, then they needed to communicate, when they needed a kiss, I was there. I was so tired that i couldn't bear to stand up and go to them and yet I did. And that is what is missing from all these enounters -- these women do not love their charges. And why should they?
ReplyDeleteCt twin mom,
ReplyDelete"these women do not love their charges. And why should they?"
I'm afraid you are right, the bad nannies don't like their jobs, or bond with their charges. They are in the wrong line of work...but...all the really good nannies I encounter do grow to love the children they care for. They are nannies because they truly enjoy being with children.
Re sitting:
On this site "park bench nannies" refers to the covens of nannies who gather on the benches to gossip or talk on their phones, and ignore their charges. I don't think any reasonable person would say no one should ever sit down in the playground!
Sarah,
I totally got your sarcasm, I guess we think alike!
Mothers sit. I do, I mean I am close by. Thats why they put benches inside the park. So a mom or another adult can watch their child play.
ReplyDelete