Received Sunday, August 12, 2007
Your Daughter is about 4, named "Maya." She was pushing my baby on the swing set (I didn't mind at all). Nanny makes her stop, calls her a fat ass, twice. "Maya" by the way, is extremely thin. This was Wednesday, (8/8) or Thursday,(8/9) about 7:30- 8pm. "Maya" had dark hair, don't remember much else.
anymore details? do you remember anything about the nanny?
ReplyDeleteI think she was Latina (nanny) but I didn't know about this site until today.. otherwise I would've made a point to remember more details. Sorry!
ReplyDeleteIf your daughter's name is Maya and she is 4 and she was out at the park at 730 at night on weds or thurs, why don't you ask her?
ReplyDeleteWhat other details do you need?
sounds like a parent to me
ReplyDeleteIf someone calls a child a fat ass in front of me I might bitch slap them ...you should have spoken up!
ReplyDeleteSuch harsh and abusive language for such a small child. )= I hope her parents read this, and fire the "ass" of a nanny!
ReplyDeleteLet's all try and remember to speak up when we hear cruelty towards children, a blog is nice...but it's also a r e a l l y long shot for finding the person and truly helping!
Disgusting...nanny or parent. Absolutely terrible. But again, an OP that didn't get involved or stand up for the child in any way.
ReplyDeleteI love how everyone says they would confront someone. You don't know what you would do until you are in that situation, and every situation is different. You don't think that a woman who would call a child a fat ass in front of others would have a problem saying something or even getting phyical with someone else? Sorry but MY child's safety comes before everyone else and if I feel its not a smart move to approach someone they I won't. Its easy to sit behind your screen and talk about what you would do. These days you don't know what someone is capable of. I've heard people being killed over lesser things.
ReplyDeleteLindsey ~SAHM~
I agree with you Lindsey. The world is full of danger and dangerous people and one of the reasons it is so is because the world is also full of cowards ... such as you. It's a no win, no win.
ReplyDeleteWhat a mean thing to say to a child. The child could become anorexic as a young adult. About those details, there are alot of Mayas in NYC. Also nannies and parents tend to venture further in the summer than in the winter, so this particular Maya could even be from the Bronx. Did this Maya have any siblings (older/younger). Did you hear her and her mom/nanny speak any other language? Please update if you remember any more details.
ReplyDeleteI ask you, people, what would have happened if the OP "stood up for" the child? Tell me what you think. My guess is that not only would it have NOT helped the situation, it would have probably made it worse.
ReplyDeleteA person who would call a small child cruel names is not going to change if a stranger tells them to. If anything, it will put them in a worse mood and they will take it out on the child. Speaking up will only make you feel better. The child is in this person's care, like it or not. Speaking up will not change this. It is sad, but the child sees this person as their protector, not a strange lady in the park. If you spoke up, the child would not be grateful to you, they will only bare the brunt of the consequences for your hasty actions.
The child would be temporarily grateful. Until the nanny had the child out of sight. Perhaps she would walk with her down the street. Then tell her "why are you following me. where is your 'friend' from the park" and the child would say "what" and the nanny would say, "ask your friend to hold your hand" and the child would look puzzled and get scared and the nanny would walk faster and faster seemingly attemptingt outrun the small child whose legs frantically tried to keep pace with the nanny. You don't think I've seen things?
ReplyDeleteWhen did you see all these "things"?, 1035? I am surprised you have not posted a sighting.
ReplyDeleteWhy attack the OP for not saying anything. Here she is saying something - so back off her!!
ReplyDeleteThose of you criticizing the OP. Suppose she had continued to confront the nanny. How do you see that ending? Do you think the nanny would say oh, you are right, I will change my ways. No, it would escalate into a shouting match, or worse, with her children there. Telling the nanny off might make you feel good, but it won't help the child. The only thing that will have a good result is exposing the nanny to the parents.
ReplyDelete11:26 and 1:05-
ReplyDeleteif people feel like they cant approach/confront people face to face then they shouldnt get on here and post about it. thats whats funny about this website: people can post pictures of nannies and talk mess but MOST are to scared to confront them face to face when these things are actually happening! only a handful of us on here would actually say something. if you can post it you should be tough enough to say it!
"talk mess about it" ???
ReplyDeleteYou are wrong. It is too easy to make things worse for the child by getting involved. You have to approach the situation cautiously, not necessarily with regard for yourself, but in some cases yes. Most of these sightings are sent in by nannies and mothers with their own children at their side. The thing to do is call the police if that is an option. It is not an option to call the police for a nanny who calls her charge a fat ass. In this event, you need to find out who the parents are. Ask around. Follow them home. Post here. Don't go off willy nilly and talking some bad ass ghetto smack just to feel like a tough guy. It isn't about you being a bad ass. It is about what happens in the next minute for that child. Or when the child gets home.
2:13-
ReplyDelete100% correct. If my child is with me I am not going to subject my child to a screaming match or the child the nanny is with and that is what it will turn into. I promise you that a nanny that calls a child a fat ass with out so much as a seconds hesitation will get right in your face if you say something. Am I scared to fight? NO, am I scared of some woman mouthing off to me? NO! But I am worried what my children might see, if it gets phyical what if the children get caught up in it and get hurt. What if she turns the name calling to your child?
Again its so big and mighty of you to sit behind your computer screen and call me a coward and think you would be the brave hero who saves the day, well I say this, save the lies, you're not foolin anyone.
If you would put your child in danger or the child that has already be bullied by her nanny, then I say you are a FOOL! and Ill take smart coward over ignorant fool any day.
Lindey ~SAHM~
I disagree with the analogy that someone who would pick on a child would not hesitate to get in the face of someone who confronts her. I think more often than not (from my experience anyway) someone who will pick on a small child would be too much of a coward to get involved with someone their "own size". They pick on a child because they can without a fight.
ReplyDeleteYou may or may not be correct, but I still vote that the nasty nanny takes it out on the child once she gets him alone. And that would be my concern. What happensn next for the child.
ReplyDeletemaybe a dumb question but OP are you certain that 'fat-ass" wasn't a nickname, albeit a weird one? A friend of mine affectionately calls her daughter a unique and somewhat unflattering nickname that I'm sure some people would find questionable.
ReplyDeleteI'd probably have said pleasantly and jokingly to both nanny and child "fat-ass??? Is that your REAL name?" and see what their reaction was.
1:09...I think that is a bit far fetched, but I do like the idea of asking the child if that is their real name. It would at least embarass the nanny
ReplyDelete2:13am/Lindsey/Lindey,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you about being cautious about confronting abusive people. A few days ago, I took my youngest child (a toddler) to a public library, where I witnessed something disturbing. Two teenage girls (approx 14 yrs old) ran into the childrens' reading room, and went to hide/read in a secluded corner. About five minutes later, a group of six teenage boys (13yrs-16yrs approx) walked in and went straight to the girls, and started yelling at them. The library security officer was within earshot of the yelling and did absolutely nothing about the situation.
The two girls stormed out, leaving the boys yelling profanity. The oldest boy yelled out how he really wanted to do some very adult things to one of the girls, and the security officer said nothing to the boys. I immediately left the library hoping to run into the girls to urge them to get as far away from there as possible. Unfortunately, I did not see the girls outside, and I hope that they ran for dear life.
I had a nagging urge to yell at the boys since I am old enough to be their mother. However, I had to keep my mouth shut for the safety of my toddler and my older children. I live in a neighborhood where the unwritten rule is to pretend to not see anything, otherwise you put yourself at risk. So in my opinion, it is important to consider several things before openly condeming anyone (neighborhood, if person is trashy, if boxcutters are popular, etc).
6:16 Lovely story, but this had nothing to do with how to handle a nanny abusing a child.
ReplyDelete6:16pm here. I am sad to learn that you found this very sad story lovely. I'm not claiming to be an expert on how to handle a nanny abusing a child. I am simply sharing my "really bad situation" story because abuse situations can be very difficult to deal with. I really hope those two nice girls will one day attend college in a nice town, and escape the morons they have to deal with in this neighborhood.
ReplyDelete