This occurred on Tuesday, 5/8/07.Mom, you made an excellent choice in hiring a nanny for your two year old. I work at this office and your child (Caucasian female, big blue eyes and long blonde hair, wearing a pink dress) came in for her checkup with her nanny (who I assumed was Eastern European from her accent). The nanny was very loving toward the girl, rocked her when she cried after her vaccines. Obviously, this child adores her nanny, because she was staying very close to her. They played for awhile in the waiting room before leaving and the nanny was promising to take the girl home and fix her a favorite lunch after the morning she'd had. I do see nannies and moms being short with kids every day and so this is refreshing, particularly when it's a caregiver.
-Anonymous Nurse
This is a child who truly needs a loving nanny if her mom or dad can't even bother to take an hour off to go to the ped. when she is getting a scary and painful vaccination!
ReplyDeleteO.K. now the moms are going to flame me with all the possible reasons the mom couldn't go.
A Nanny
you are kidding, right? as a working mother, I take off every chance I get for every play, concert, presentation or class trip my child has. I cannot make every immunization. You sound like an asshat nanny. Please sign your future posts as such.
ReplyDelete"asshat"? Wow, mom, you're really classy.
ReplyDeleteI agree with the first poster: my first thought was the poor kid her mom can't even take her to the doctor.
I used to be a nanny before I had my daughter and the people I nannied for were real wackos but they still took the baby to the doctor, I will say that for them.
Of course it's impossible to make every event your child has, especially if you are a crazy mom who overschedules (sound familiar??) but the important things are the very personal events and this includes well-visits, especially for the little ones.
Mom who posted, please sign your future posts as "judgemental and defensively guilt-ridden."
it isn't a classy or non classy comment. Some ridiculous nanny came on the blog on MOTHER's DAY and insulted a mother. A nanny. Who owes her life to A WORKING MOTHER.
ReplyDeleteRidiculous!
Of course a nanny like the two that posted are going to critisize the mother for everything they didn't do. All they care about is TIME OFF.
I'm sorry, but no nanny "owes her life" to any mother. We are not slaves, indentured servants, or people who should be unusually grateful to those who employ us. Child care is a PROFESSION, one that you, 4:53 should RESPECT more, seeing as how you're a mother.
ReplyDeleteAnd using profanity against a stranger on a blog such as this is MOST CERTAINLY not a classy thing. I'm very surprised you can defend it (that is, I'm assuming that you, 4:53, aren't the same commenter as 2:07, but perhaps you are).
We, as nannys and parents, are supposed to be educators and people who are children can look up to. When I read this post I too felt that it was a little sad that the mother of the child wasn't with her while she got a shot, I know I always wanted my mother during visits like that. But, I'm AN ADULT and I don't ASSUME I know EVERYTHING about OTHER PEOPLE'S LIVES. There are a million and one reasons why this child's mother might not have been there with her. She's lucky that she also has a caregiver who can soothe her through a trying experience.
I think it's great how many people come on this site and give their OPINIONS and INSIGHT, but I am continually disappointed by people who just want to lecture other mothers or caregivers about how they should or should not live their lives.
I am a nanny to a lovely family and I regularly take my charge to his doctor's appointments. The important thing is that he has someone there who loves him and can comfort him, whether it be mom or nanny. Maybe first poster doesn't have a close relationship with charge?
ReplyDeleteAll they care about is TIME OFF? Are you serious?
ReplyDeleteOr...maybe they very deeply care about children and just want the best for them? That is our job after all.
If nanny is good, it is normal and right to let her take child to the doctor.
ReplyDeleteI'm a nanny, and it is my job to make mother feel her child is safe
and protected.
I'm mother to, and I understand how hard is to be a working mother
Respect for Mothers and Happy Mother's Day!
Asshat makes me laugh. Just imagining what an asshat must look like...
ReplyDeleteIs it just me or did anyone else think that I wouldn't want my child to spend any extra time playing in a pediatrician's office full of sick children and germy toys. It struck me as odd.
Whether you are a working mom, or a stay at home mom, your goal should be the same when hiring a CCP-- that is to find someone who you trust and like, who is capable of caring for your child. It is refreshing to hear about this story in the doctors office; that the child was comforted so lovingly by her CCP. At the end of the day, it does not matter why the mom was not there, what matters is that the child was in good hands and well-cared for in her absence.
ReplyDeleteOP -- since you must know the child's name and have her mom's contact info, why not give her a call? "I just wanted to let you know what a pleasure it was having [child] and [nanny] in the office today. I thought you'd like to know how wonderful [nanny] was with your daughter -- so reasurring and loving. Etc, etc, etc."
ReplyDeleteIf you don't want to call just for that reason, maybe you can concoct a question you need to ask about a future appointment, or just give a follow up call to see how [child] is doing after her shot?
I was just thinking it was so sweet of you to post that here, and I bet the mom would love to hear it.
this was a good nanny sighting and there was no need to bring the parents into it. I think there may have been a good reason for the child to go to the doctor, accompanied by the nanny. I hope so anyway.
ReplyDelete10:04, those were my exact thoughts! As a nanny who has taken children to the pediatrician's before, be it for check ups or sick visits, I know how stressful it can be on a child but I too am the one to sit and rock him/her and give the child an extra special treat afterward.
ReplyDelete12:25 - I am surprised by your reply. Usually I am on the same page as you, but come on, it is your job, as a nanny, to make mom and dad's life easier and put the child first!
2:07 - Congrats to you for having a job with the flexibility to take so much time off. But, shame on you if you have a nanny that is not capable of "filling your shoes" when you are otherwise obigated.
4:53 - Puhlease...mother's day is a holiday invented by Hallmark and other card/candy stores to generate sales during the "off-season". You are probably the type of mother who expects everyone to drop what they are doing and worship you for the day. As a mother, I have made it clear to my family that mother's day is just another holiday - like Valentine's day that I prefer they not waste their time and money buying me something stupid and sterotypical because they feel they have to. Then again, I have a husband who is always telling me and showing me how much he appreciates everything I do for him and our child - especially since I am a working mother who not only runs my own household, but someone else's household also.
I am sorry I offended some working moms. Of course there are times when a child becomes ill and the nanny takes him/her to the ped. I think people missed the fact that this was a well baby visit for a toddler. These are scheduled at your convenience. If something comes up you can change the appointment. Some peds. have before and after work, and Saturday hours to accommodate working parents. Well baby appointments are a time to ask questions, discuss developmental milestones, etc. My employer meets me at the office, so that we can both be there for any discussion. Is she the exception among working moms in thinking this is important?
ReplyDelete8:49 PM:
I have a very loving relationship with my charges, but I also know I am not Mommy!
9:04 AM
Yes, it is our job to make life easier for the parents, but sometimes what is easiest for the parents is not in the best interest of the child.
I don't understand why you think my opinion that the parents should make an effort to attend well baby visits is not putting the child first.
A Nanny (AKA asshat)
Asshat nanny,
ReplyDeleteyou are being ridiculous. I know SAHMs who dont take their children to the doctor's appointments for well visits or sick visits. I know sahms who never volunteer at dd's school and miss performances and presentations. SAHMS with nannies!
Take you anger up with them. Try to understand that working mothers do the very best that they can but they cannot control who they work for- they can try and most do to find employers who work with the schedules of mothers. But to think that every working mother can make it for ever well child visit is purely idiotic. The dr's office is only opened M-F! There are no late night or early morning hours. I hate for the nanny to have to take the child to the dr for me. I hate that I have to ask nanny what the dr said or what dc weighed at the dr or if she cried when she got her shot. It hurts my heart that I cannot be there for my child 100 percent of the time.
In my absence, my children have the sort of nanny that is followed home from parks and has even been sent flower arrangements from potential poachers. She has been with us for 7 years and is like a member of our family. We work as a unit, my husband, the nanny and I to make sure that we can give our children the very best of everything. And I am quite tired of hearing people attack working mothers.
Are not some of these professional nannies working mothers themselves? It isn't easy being a working mother. We do the best we can.
The "SAHM Vs. Working Mom Vs. Top Professional Nanny" debate is just plain silly. Any of the above three should be able to take a child to the doctor and update the one who could not make it to the doctor's office that day. Simply have the doctor update the vaccinations chart, and print out a copy of the child's growth/development chart. Don't forget to bring lots of fruit roll ups.
ReplyDeleteI get a lot of crap about being a SAHM, I even got booted out of a Moms' Group because its bylaws suddenly changed to exclude SAHMs. Meanwhile Working moms get criticized for doing what they can to pay the mortgage and other expenses.
The bottom line is all three are productive members of society and do very important things, so quit comparing and competing. :)
Wow Kelly, I wouldn't mind hearing more about that mom's group drama. What politics went on there?
ReplyDelete"Don't forget to bring lots of fruit roll ups."?
ReplyDeleteWhy? So we can open up the debate to who should be in the waiting room while the kids get their cavities filled?
Yes! Fruit Roll Ups!
ReplyDeleteNow quit critisizing me for suggesting that frull roll ups accompany some kids to the doctor's office. Are you one of those Know-It-All moms who go around judging others. Jeez, I am sorry I don't have a freaking organic food garden in my kitchen. Go find something else to judge about. It is people like you who make themselves feel better about the crap you do by critisizing others. What is wrong with your sense of self worth?
To Jmt:
ReplyDeleteThe group organizer is a working mom, and may have felt short changed. I actually still like the group organizer even though the changed the bylaws that excluded me and my toddler.
I have joined other groups that have SAHMs & Working moms that appreciate each other's efforts.
Have a beautiful day!
Vaccinations and well-child visits are once every 3-6 months, if that as they get older. Jeez. Not exactly countless visits requiring tons of time.
ReplyDeletesick child visits, well child visits, school plays, school presentations, school interviews, (older children),
ReplyDeleteStop ragging on working mothers.
Who would possibly do that except a childless (bitch) nanny! Or a bitter SAHM with no help.
Hmmm. If you are referring to 9:42, 9:44, I am neither a nanny or a SAHM. I am indeed a working mother--full-time, outside the home. I guess I was ragging on myself.
ReplyDelete