tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post4385163915001926877..comments2024-03-19T03:27:24.068-04:00Comments on I SAW YOUR NANNY: Honor my commitment or get out now?Leigh Raymerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18210572527823459842noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-70264099509973468112008-06-29T15:57:00.000-04:002008-06-29T15:57:00.000-04:00Are they going away for thre months, because that ...Are they going away for thre months, because that is how long it may take you to rearrange the entire house?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-32688842352124254452008-06-28T22:07:00.000-04:002008-06-28T22:07:00.000-04:00This comment has been removed by the author.Princes Rajahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16753515718163247281noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-83106418800384213782008-06-28T21:30:00.000-04:002008-06-28T21:30:00.000-04:00Hey there it's Julia. Thanks for all the advice. T...Hey there it's Julia. <BR/><BR/>Thanks for all the advice. They are still on vacation. <BR/><BR/>Thanks, Sarah and Mitch and all the others who gave input. This is very interesting. I will definitely have a contract - I already have a list of things I require for next time. This will not happen again. <BR/><BR/>Regarding quitting, you're right - I will have to find the ideal job first. I don't know if I can or not right now. I just found out yesterday there is a very good chance I can't have kids one day. I had no idea. It makes it harder for me to say goodbye to these kids. I don't think this makes any sense to anyone but for some reason it affected me this way.<BR/><BR/>To the Anonomyous person at 12:48, 60 bucks a week for gas! all I can say is LUCKY!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-71933020626066810392008-06-28T12:48:00.000-04:002008-06-28T12:48:00.000-04:00I get paid 52 weeks a year regardless of how many ...I get paid 52 weeks a year regardless of how many days each week I work. My family has been taking mini vacations every week for 6 weeks now. I still get my standard salary.<BR/><BR/>I was sick one day earlier this year and she paid me for it, which I wasn't expecting but it sure came in handy. She also didn't get upset with me for being sick and even sent me a text message asking how I was feeling later in the day.<BR/><BR/>The only thing that she doesn't pay me for when they go on vacation is gas, which I have no problem with. Because the gas prices are so high and I transport their children daily to activities they usually give me an extra 60 bucks a week, but since I only watch the kids about 3 days a week now because of all the mini vacations she doesn't give me the extra gas money.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-29914467235573291512008-06-27T21:28:00.000-04:002008-06-27T21:28:00.000-04:00You need to insist that she pay you for the time t...You need to insist that she pay you for the time that they are away. Also, if you are expected to come to the house every single day she needs to reimburse you for gas costs on those days... since you normally would not be driving to her house on those "days off." <BR/><BR/>In that time she is gone, look for a new job, to start as soon as you possibly can. This person sounds like someone who would tell you not to bother showing up the next day if you give 2-4 weeks notice. I still think you should give 2 weeks notice, but definitely have something lined up.<BR/><BR/>Also, now you have these problems to consider for the futre. Start typing an employment-agreement plan for yourself and have it be understood by the next family what you expect, in addition to what they expect/ask of you. This lady does not anybody's interest in mind but her own, and it is obvious she is very much taking advantage of you. Which is a shame, because you obviously care about the kids a lot. <BR/><BR/>Also, you need to decide what is reasonable for her to ask of you while they are gone. Spring cleaning is not your job. Reorganizing closets is NOT your job. Certainly, arranging the cabninets is absolutely not your job. If you will be spending more than 46 hours at their house in the week they are gone, you need to negotiate over time pay especially because you will be doing MUCH more work than you normally do in watching two children. Sitting and supervising the painters does count as time on the clock, since she is asking you to do it.<BR/><BR/><BR/>Get out of there. Don't let her walk all over you anymore. I understand the fear of not having a paycheck, but really, you need to make sure you have a backbone and can insist on what is fair. Good luck! I hope you can update and let us know how it went.Sarahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15815542349245090209noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-34799108286708332792008-06-27T07:14:00.000-04:002008-06-27T07:14:00.000-04:00To the 3 weeks nanny: That's just odd. I don't t...To the 3 weeks nanny: That's just odd. I don't think you could plan a family vacation in 3 weeks, so it sounds as if your family didn't clue you in as early as they could. I would ask for a meeting to 'touch base', go over various things (if you've got any other positive/negative things to talk about--and don't we all usually?). In the meeting bring up the fact that you only got 3 weeks to plan your vacation. Point out that you didn't have time to do whatever it is that you would have liked. Ask to ammend the contract for the future so that you receive at least 2 months (or how ever much time you think you'd need) notice. <BR/><BR/>Unfortunately, I think the boat has sailed for you on this years vacation time. I can't imagine they're going to give you a third week, but if you're calm about explaining your feelings to them (and you're dealing with reasonable people) then perhaps they'll find another way to compensate for their mistake. But, if they don't , at least you know it won't happen again b/c you've ammended your contract.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-3803560468086021102008-06-27T00:31:00.000-04:002008-06-27T00:31:00.000-04:00One Fabulous Nanny.."come to Jesus" meeting That's...One Fabulous Nanny..<BR/><BR/>"come to Jesus" meeting <BR/><BR/>That's the funniest thing I've read all day. Thanks for the chuckle!<BR/><BR/>OP <BR/><BR/>Sounds like your employer is unfamiliar with how to treat a nanny. This is one of the reasons I went through the agency I went through. They have rules families need to follow regarding pay, time off, health insurance etc.. Maybe you should consider going through one next time.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-49847055006666953692008-06-27T00:28:00.000-04:002008-06-27T00:28:00.000-04:00Whoever was asking earlier about the three weeks t...Whoever was asking earlier about the three weeks thing... absolutely not, in my opinion. I would never be able to plan a week-long vacation in three weeks. I am going to Florida in two weeks, and that has been planned for about 2 months. I am also going to NYC in October and that planning has been going on since April. The NYC trip is kind of an outlier since it's so far away from me, but I think I probably need 6 weeks MINIMUM to plan a weeklong trip (not to mention come up with the cash to fund it).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-5004748038691870832008-06-27T00:16:00.000-04:002008-06-27T00:16:00.000-04:00If you are going to compare nanny jobs to other in...If you are going to compare nanny jobs to other industries, fortune 500 Cos. etc. There are differences. Some businesses have retirement plans. Some provide health insurance. Some have stock options. In some there is the possibility of advancement if you do a good job. Why don't you mention some of those things. Oh, don't nannies get those things?<BR/><BR/>Nannies get paid 52 weeks a year. If the employer chooses to take more than two weeks vacation, that is THEIR choice. <BR/>In your next contract, make sure that is clear. Also the number of sick days, holidays, and gas reimbursement. In writing!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-13594382529139009582008-06-26T23:37:00.000-04:002008-06-26T23:37:00.000-04:00calif nanny here...When a family takes a vacation ...calif nanny here...When a family takes a vacation the nanny should be paid, full pay without having to worry about "other" work. The nanny is available and ready to work, I worked for a banker who had accrued 6 weeks vacation.. well guess what..I cant afford a 6 week vacation. I cant afford a 2 day vacation, so I dont take vacations. They paid me whenever they were gone. When kids go to private school or daycare they pay whether they are in or out...no deductions for sick days or whatever. Why would a nanny be different? And you arent the handy man or maid...that list is ridiculous. I dont get sick days or vacation days but I get enough time off with their vacations and the 9 paid holidays I get. I never asked for sick days. I have been out sick (gall bladder surgery) and was paid anyway though. Let this lady get someone else to run around. Next time write up a contract spelling all this out. I did...2 yrs INTO working with a family (its never too late) cause things started to come up that I wanted in writing.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-73839346799645842692008-06-26T21:38:00.000-04:002008-06-26T21:38:00.000-04:00Cali mom, I know Juilia wasn't asking about legali...Cali mom, I know Juilia wasn't asking about legality, I was addressing your attitude toward her breaking her 'contract' (which, as I suspected, she doesn't have).Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-22884517538178817912008-06-26T21:26:00.000-04:002008-06-26T21:26:00.000-04:00Emily, Julia's question was not does she have a le...Emily, Julia's question was not does she have a legal right to leave her job. Of course she does. Her question was, would she be unreasonable to do so and my opinion was yes.<BR/><BR/>Julia, thanks for the details. I think pay per week qualifies as salary, since it is not hourly. That *should* mean however, that if you miss a few hours in a week, you get the same salary as you would for a full week, which it sounds like you don't. Also, I just threw in the example of health insurance because it is mentioned frequently here, but it doesn't apply here, so sorry to confuse the issue.<BR/><BR/>I'd say you would be reasonable to propose that instead of her making up the difference between whatever pay you miss when they travel and what you are able to bring in elsewhere, she just pay you for a set amount of vacation time (say 2 weeks) whether it's time THEY travel, or time YOU choose to go somewhere. Or alternately that they pay you a percentage (at LEAST half) your regular pay when THEY decide to take off. Either of those options would be much more predictable and I think more fair than just what she has proposed. After all, if you worked and earned much MORE money for some other family when she was gone, of course you wouldn't be obligated to pay HER the difference! It just seems a bit of a wishy washy plan, subject to too many variables. 4 sick days a year would be reasonable, and gas mileage reimbursement or budget is essentioal. I don't understand how they can feel it's not fair to give you that, or why that was never insisted upon before. And I do agree that it seems a bit uneven that you watch another girl for that long in exchange for not much of the other mom's time.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, I can see not accepting a job with these terms (essentially, the lack of pay when THEY go on vacation is the main issue?) but to stay in one for this long and then decide AFTER they have offered what they may think are fair compromises, is somewhat unreasonable. But if they won't pony up a bit better and one of the other families you've filled in for needs you FT and can meet your needs, that may be better for you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-69557028963427698332008-06-26T20:33:00.000-04:002008-06-26T20:33:00.000-04:00I could never work for your employer, Julia. The l...I could never work for your employer, Julia. The lack of respect for how hard you work and that you have a life to support would drive me crazy. <BR/><BR/>My job isn't always perfect, but my employer respects me and I respect her. I've never taken a sick day off, but she gave me a day off when I was feeling sick at the last minute. The family took ten day's holiday in the States and paid me to stay home and sleep in, and they've done in again now that they're taking two weeks in France. I offered to buy in some food for them to come home to but she wouldn't here of it, and I'm taking a Monday off for my own holiday in August but still getting paid for it. <BR/><BR/>The point I'm trying to make is, good childcare is hard to find and there are families out there that are in such need of a good nanny that they'll be willing to treat you with the respect you deserve. <BR/><BR/>The parents you work for now should be ashamed of themselves.Sheeplehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08351283288678239749noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-48672279155694316012008-06-26T19:53:00.000-04:002008-06-26T19:53:00.000-04:00Oh, two more things...We don't have a contract, it...Oh, two more things...<BR/><BR/>We don't have a contract, it's a verbal agreement.<BR/><BR/>Also, Calimom, you said:<BR/>"... I think it's unreasonable for their employee to expect insurance paid 100%, 6 sick days and 3 weeks paid vacation."<BR/><BR/>I actually don't have health insurance, or expect it from them. I don't expect 6 sick days, it was actually 4. (But 5 would be good). And I don't expect 3 weeks paid vacation either. I actually don't get vacation days. I just want to be covered when the family takes off to go have fun. If they left for three weeks I would seek work and I would want them to pay the difference.<BR/><BR/>I just got done empyting all the kitchen cabinets not long ago. They have TOO MUCH JUNK! I hope they have fun putting it all back because I am not going to do that. See, I am putting my foot down a little bit.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-45677484048768999042008-06-26T19:27:00.000-04:002008-06-26T19:27:00.000-04:00Hello, it's Julia the OP. I need to respond first ...Hello, it's Julia the OP. <BR/><BR/>I need to respond first to Calimom because she was the only one who played devil's advocate for me, which I appreciate. <BR/><BR/>To answer your questions, my schedule is not flexible - it's 8:15 to 5:30 MWF, and 8:15 to 6p.m. on Tuesdays and Thursdays. <BR/><BR/>I get paid per week, no salary.<BR/><BR/>Also, I can run into obstacles when trying to take a sick day or personal day. In fact, just to illustrate, during the 2007 October Wildfires, I called to make sure the I wasn't supposed to come to work. Her neighborhood was not too far from an evacuating area, and she informed the family had been up all night packing to evacuate as a precaution. She told me they had been counting on me to come up to work for a couple hours so the parents could nap before they evactuate. I told her I was hesitant to leave my neighborhood which was in the safe zone. I was afraid of getting stuck in bad traffic in the event her area was evacuated. She told me that she was disappointed and would not pay me for that day.<BR/><BR/>Just an example.<BR/><BR/>As far as our negotiations for the new contract, you are right. I got a raise and the promise of being covered while the family takes vacation. I said I would seek other work and she would cover the difference so I didn't have to worry. We did not discuss chores. <BR/><BR/>But I do want to say that before any of this, I already offered to take on more and more for the family. In addition to offering to drop off and pick up the oldest daughter, I was also watching her friend's child for three hours every Thursday. (The friend's mom would drop off "my" oldest girl two days a week in exchange) I don't know how to explain but I would try to do extra things to make life easier, try to teach a little more to the kids, and give them little treats here and there. For instance, I really try hard to help the four year old with her reading. These things came from the heart.<BR/><BR/>So you are right, Calimom. She may and probably will think I am unreasonable. Maybe I am. All I really wanted was for her to want to give me something, and want to show me generosity. <BR/><BR/>Tell me, how can she show me she appreciates me?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-49343008340639116872008-06-26T18:26:00.000-04:002008-06-26T18:26:00.000-04:009:29 -- Did you read the post? She did articulate ...9:29 -- Did you read the post? She did articulate her concerns to her boss several times. The boss is not giving her what she needs. How am I being negative? I'm telling her what I think needs to happen for her life to improve.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05095975261958113452noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-2378489436948360012008-06-26T17:36:00.000-04:002008-06-26T17:36:00.000-04:00The family I work for frequently takes "mini trips...The family I work for frequently takes "mini trips" and has taken 2 vacations since I've been with them (just over 10 months) one of which I went on, and one of which I didn't. I am paid the same whether they are in town or not. The way my bosses view it, it's not like I have a choice of whether or not to work those days that they are out of town. During their week long ski trip, the mother asked me to purge and organize the play room, which I honestly didn't have a problem doing. As for the list you were given, I, personally, would expect double the pay conisdering it's not a nanny job, but a much more labor intensive (peeling stickers off of cabinets, are you JOKING? It's nearly impossible and takes hours!) job and not your normal duties. <BR/><BR/>As for the sick days, I am the pot calling the kettle because I don't have sick days, but EVERY job should afford them. 5 per year is standard. Look up your states laws, and see if they can give you any guidelines.<BR/><BR/>I would have a "come to Jesus" meeting with the woman as soon as possible and state exactly what you MUST have, and if she can't meet those expectations, tell her she'll need to start looking for a replacement nanny. I know you are crazy about the children, as I am about mine (usually lol), but in order for you to give them your best care, YOU must be taken care of first.<BR/><BR/>I haven't taken the time to read everyone else's responses, so I apologize if this is just a repeat! Best of luck, and keep us updated!One Fabulous Nannyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08871164176122326111noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-60595652890428136922008-06-26T17:09:00.000-04:002008-06-26T17:09:00.000-04:00Sweetie quite now and don't you dare do their hous...Sweetie quite now and don't you dare do their house work!Marissa M.https://www.blogger.com/profile/09670316761454871953noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-42094443981560486262008-06-26T16:48:00.000-04:002008-06-26T16:48:00.000-04:00The OP hasn't weighed in, but it doesn't sound lik...The OP hasn't weighed in, but it doesn't sound like she's got a contract, more like a verbal agreement (OP, please correct me if I'm wrong).<BR/><BR/>Even if she does have a contract, being a household employee is an at-will position, Cali Mom. That means that she can give notice at any time & the parents can fire her at any time w/o having to buy her out of her contract (if she has one).<BR/><BR/>The market really determines 'reasonableness' in the workplace, and, as I and many others have assured the OP, she can easily get a new job that offers the bare standards of a secure full-time job. You, or her employer in this case, can be annoyed all you like, but you could also be w/o a nanny.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-73774719686360000452008-06-26T16:44:00.000-04:002008-06-26T16:44:00.000-04:00How do crappy employers even get away with this?! ...How do crappy employers even get away with this?! Two weeks paid vacation is standard in the industry. If they choose to leave, you should still get your paycheck. Do they give up their paychecks when they are out of the office?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-9469573979231666122008-06-26T16:14:00.002-04:002008-06-26T16:14:00.002-04:00Quick question to the other nannies on this blog.....Quick question to the other nannies on this blog...<BR/><BR/>Let's say in your contract it states you get two vacation weeks a year (plus holiday and sick days etc..). One of the Vacation weeks you choose yourself and the other one is a week off when the family is on vacation. You're told 3 weeks in advance before their vacation so you can plan your own vaca, <BR/><BR/>Fair??Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-19769784914391310332008-06-26T16:14:00.001-04:002008-06-26T16:14:00.001-04:00Quick question to the other nannies on this blog.....Quick question to the other nannies on this blog...<BR/><BR/>Let's say in your contract it states you get two vacation weeks a year (plus holiday and sick days etc..). One of the Vacation weeks you choose yourself and the other one is a week off when the family is on vacation. You're told 3 weeks in advance before their vacation so you can plan your own vaca, <BR/><BR/>Fair??Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-16289455482532922242008-06-26T16:14:00.000-04:002008-06-26T16:14:00.000-04:00OMG.That list has nothing to do with Nanny'ing.RUN...OMG.<BR/><BR/>That list has nothing to do with Nanny'ing.<BR/><BR/>RUN.<BR/><BR/>But darlin' if you're willing to work that hard run to my house, I don't need a Nanny but I sure could use a wife.<BR/><BR/>xoxo<BR/>SueAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-39530796953219658302008-06-26T15:43:00.000-04:002008-06-26T15:43:00.000-04:00Hmm, that was me. Again, I thought my name was the...Hmm, that was me. Again, I thought my name was there.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32916951.post-40431976651225237382008-06-26T15:41:00.000-04:002008-06-26T15:41:00.000-04:00Emily, it was a publishing company that shut down ...Emily, it was a publishing company that shut down for 2 weeks and hourly employees did NOT get paid. Most of my jobs since then have been salaried, which as I said, makes an important distinction. That's something to consider when deciding whether or not to accept a job.<BR/><BR/>Of course the nanny is free to abandon her agreement, but it sounds as if the employer is NOT breaking any contracts - just offering some terms that OP would be unhappy with. So IMO, the nanny is being unreasonable in feeling that she is being cheated or abused, and as her employer, I would be annoyed at what I'd percieve as her reneging on her end of a deal. <BR/><BR/>And IMO, it IS relevant what her employers get. If they pay 100% of their own medical insurance (most companies DON'T pay 100% of employee's health insurance) and get 4 sick days and 1 week paid vacation, I think it's unreasonable for their employee to expect insurance paid 100%, 6 sick days and 3 weeks paid vacation.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com